Deeper Meaning

We're Brothers Head Ass

Devante's POV cont.

I woke up and the sun was hitting my face early in the morning. The sun in my face made me remember something. oh my fucking god today is the day. Gotdamn. I can't believe I finna write today. I'm praying that someone out them three will respond and write back to me. Maybe they won't write back because of how I was in '01. Let's just pray on it. "Wassup nigga.", Dalvin said. "Good morning to you too, nigga.", I said. Yall don't worry about me and Dalvin. We gone always talk to each other like this no matter what part of this story. Oh damn. my bad I forgot I'm not suppose to breaking the 4th wall with yall lol. Anyways....I walked towards my fridge and grabbed some milk and cereal even though Dalvin was cooking some food. "NIgga I know you see my cooking some shit for us.", Dalvin said. "Naw nigga., you cooked some shit for yourself. I'm not eating no more breakfast shit from you anymore. The last time I did was when...", I stopped myself. "When Yvette and Fu were over here faithfully for brunches.", Dalvin finished my sentence. There was a silence between me and Dalvin. I closed the fridge and started eating in the kitchen table. Dalvin finished cooking and also started eating in the kitchen table. We ate in silence.

Minutes passed by us. I had so much shit on my mind that I stopped eating for awhile. "De..you good?", Dalvin said. "Yeah, I'm straight. It's just that I'm real nervous about what's about to happen. I mean...come now..18 years is a long ass time to not speak to somebody.", I said. "Yeah, you right about that. But at least you'll know they'll always help us out. Remember back in '92?", Dalvin asked. "Hell yeah I remember '92. That was when Yvette and Fu let us stay in they house until Diary Of A Mad Band was completely finished.", I said. "But this time things are different.", I added. "Well you got make a difference today, Devante. You already said you were gonna write to them today, must well get it over with.", Dalvin said. Damn he serious. Only time this nigga call me Devante is when Jodeci gets interviewed without me or when he's deadass serious. I sighed and looked at this nigga. "Alright. Gone head and give some paper and a pencil while you at it.",  I said. "Nigga I'm not no motherfucking slave to you. You can get yo own shit.", Dalvin said. "Bitch just get the stuff so I can get this shit done.", I said. "I'm not a bitch I'm a real ass nigga.", Dalvin said. "A real ass nigga who finna get knocked the fuck out in real life.", I said. "We not little no more nigga. We grown nigga. I can drop yo ass like change.", Dalvin said. "And I can drop yo ass right now.", I said getting up from the table. "Do some nigga. Run the fuck up.", Dalvin said while getting up as well. We were both looking at each other. Dalvin started laughing and so did I. I'm sorry but I can't take Dalvin seriously when he get aggressive and I know he can't do the same when I get aggressive. "Man..let me get you some pencil and paper.", Dalvin said while he was still laughing.  Dalvin gave me some sheets of paper and two pencils. "Damn. I almost forgot?", Dalvin said. "What?", I said. "I forgot to tell where Yvette and Fu lives at now.", Dalvin said. "Well...where the fuck do they live at?", I asked. "I think they live in Tennessee or Missouri?", he said. "I thought they lived on the West Coast.", I said. "Naw, they don't., he said. "Wait. Do you know where Zhen lives at then? I know she gotta be grown at this point.  I at least want to say I'm sorry for never speaking to her and letting my problems with her parents  go so long.", I said. "I think she lives in Oregon or Texas.", Dalvin said. "Nigga do you think or do you know?", I asked. "Okay nigga damn. I KNOW for a fact that she lives in Oregon..... she's in Eugene, Oregon. It's just that the last time I seen Zhen was when we had that tour in Texas.", Dalvin said. "What year?", I asked. "Uhh...I think it was in 2012.", Dalvin said. "Nigga I didn't go on that tour cuz Dyana was in that car accident pregnant.", I said. "Oh yeah. I forgot all about that shit.", he said. "Nigga shut the fuck up. I'm tryna to start writing.", I said. "Who the fuck you think you talking to?", Dalvin said. "That motherfucking owl nigga. Now shut the fuck up so I can write.", I said while grabbing the pencil. "Bitch fuck you, that skinny ass pencil, and them bulky ass sheets of papers you got.", Dalvin said while smiling. "Hoe I'm trying to write. Can you please give the person who wrote ALL of our songs some space? I gotta get my creative juices flowing.", I said with a funny accent. "Nigga I wrote some songs for us.", he said. "Nigga you wrote the fucking remix of Feenin', Get On Up, and half of Every Moment.", I said while chuckling. "Nigga you know damn well I worte more songs than them three.", he said. "I know I know.", I said. After our little dialogue ended, I actually started to write.

Dear Zhen, Princess, or whatever you like being called,

     I know it's been a really been a long time since we've seen each other. And I also realize that you're probably grown now so I shouldn't write to you like you're eight years old. I just want to tell you that I apologize for being so careless, aloof, and detached from you and your family. I was being consumed by the very thing that was supposed to help me and....it was pills. I thought I was helping myself with those pills but in reality...I just wanted to feel the ultimate high. They made me feel cozy but lazy and being lazy is something I never really liked being. So I stopped and realized that I wasn't the person that I know I am or can be. I also want to apologize...to your parents. Yvette, you were right. You were right about everything that night. And Fu, I'm sorry that I wasn't acting like the brother I normally act and that I still have that picture you gave to me. I miss everything. I missed playing cards with yall and always winning. Yall constantly thought that I was cheating when simply yall just couldn't play the game right. Yvette, I missed your cooking. Your cooking always had a nigga on his knees begging for more. I missed letting yall listen to all of the unreleased music me and Dalvin did. I miss seeing yall, hearing yall, and being around yall. Yall was and still are like family to me. I know times have changed but I just want yall to know that...I changed too. Sorry I had to do it old school on yall but I don't know yall numbers but hopeful we can all get each others numbers whenever we met.

Love, Peace & Hair Grease

 From Devante

"You done?", Dalvin asked. "Yup. I'm done. Now all I have to do is just send it off to Zhen.", I said. "Finally nigga. You been writing for two hours. Damn.", Dalvin said. "Nigga just give the fucking address to Zhen's place.", I said. "Alright hoe ass nigga. Her address is 112 Douglass Lane, Eugene, Oregon 97408.", Dalvin said. "Wait a fucking minute. How the fuck do you know her address and I don't?", I asked. "Nigga cuz unlike you, I'm still connected and keep in touch with them.", Dalvin said. "Man fuck you.", I said while writing the address down with mines. After I did that I ,because Dalvin bodyguard bulit ass didn't want to, sent the letter out. I'm hoping and praying that I do get a response and for the response to be welcoming and positive like mines.