New perspective (#1)

Chapter 27

Ryan's POV
It's not like I don't like Brendon. I really like him. It's just that if we're in a relationship there won't be a way out unless you break up and if you break up you most likely won't stay friends.

I mean, some people stay friends. But I don't think I could do that. So if he leaves me we're fucked. I can't get too close to him. Rather friends than nothing at all, right?

My phone buzzed and the name on the screen put a smile on my face.

9:57am
Forehead: You're officially no longer my enemy. It doesn't mean you don't annoy me anymore though.

9:58am
Ryan: You're officially no longer my enemy either. I sometimes still dislike you though.

My response was a lie. I would never dislike him. Perhaps dislike that I like him. Be mad at him for existing because if he didn't I wouldn't struggle with this thing people would call 'like in the air'.

Maybe people don't actually say that but whatever. You get my point.

And really I'm only mad at myself but I like to blame him because the last thing I'd do is admit that I'm the problem.

I think I just did. Oh well.

10:03am
Forehead: Friends?

10:03am
Ryan: Friends.

I was still trying to process the fact that Brendon was my friend. Friend. It's a strange word if you think about it.

He's a friend that annoys me because I like him.

I have feelings for my friend which makes it weird to call him my friend. A part of me has this huge need of calling him mine, but he wasn't.

If only Brendon was mine.

I had the chance but I blew it. I did it for both our sakes though. I don't want to get hurt and I don't think Brendon wants to get hurt too.

Processing this is getting better.

Cleaverness in the stupidity.

I had just taken a shower and decided to stay in bed all day listening to music. Spencer and Patrick were probably hanging out with the others or eating breakfast.

After an hour of listening to music I fell asleep. Not that I wanted to, I didn't mind, but I was just so tired, even if it was still morning.

"I'm starting to worry about him again." Someone mumbled far, far away which got me half awake. My eyes were still closed and I was just about to zone out again when someone replied.

"He's fine." Someone said quietly.

"I don't think he is. From my perspective it looks like he's pushing Brendon away, then coming back to him and then pushing him away again. He's scared and confused. I think it's happening again..."

That was what I heard before I fell back to sleep. I didn't think much about it and forgot it almost immediately.

-

"Babyboy, wake up!" Spencer. I groaned in discomfort and snuggled my face into the most beautiful boy laying on my chest. But he seemed really light?