Her Husband (Commit #8)

Chapter Ten:

ARE YOU WITH THE RIGHT PARTNER?

During a seminar, a woman asked," How do I know if I am with the right person?"

The speaker then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, "It depends. Is that your partner?"

In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?"

"Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind" replied the speaker.

Here's the answer.

Every relationship has a cycle... In the beginning; you
fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls,
want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love was not hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You did not have to do anything. That is why it's called "falling" in love.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened to you.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It is a natural cycle of every relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, "Am I with the right person?" And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it is learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does not lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.

I am not saying that you could not fall in love with someone else. You could. And temporarily you would feel better. But you would be in the same situation a few years later.

Because listen carefully to this:

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it is learning to love the person you found.

Sustaining love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You must work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands wisdom. You must know what to do to make it work. Make no mistake about it!

Love is not a mystery. There are specific things you can do with or without your partner. Just as there are physical laws of the universe such as gravity, there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a "decision". Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let GO!

Napatayo pa kaming mga participants matapos ang speech ng speaker, very well said.

Nararamdaman ko ang maiinit niyang mga kamay sa palad ko bago kami muling na-upo. Napabuntong hininga pa ako bago nakinig muli sa speaker.

Married life really sounds scary, habang palapit ng palapit ang araw na itinakda ay mas naghahalo-halo emotions ko buti na lang may mga ganitong ek-ek na seminar bago ang wedding rites and this kind of speech is mostly needed sa mga tulad naming papasok sa buhay may asawa.

"Sino rito sa inyo ang nagli-live-in na?" tanong ng speaker

I wanted to raise my hands but he don't let me, mahigpit ang pagkakahawak sa kamay ko. Oh well, iyan nga ang dahilan kaya kami nandito ngayon. Live-in is not an optioned sa mga tulad kong nanumpa at nagse-served sa bayan.

People always think na kapag public servant lalo na kung teacher ka, you should always act as good example to others but people forgot na 20th century na. People nowdays have different perspective when it comes to relationship at higit sa lahat other people forgot that we are also human being... we commit mistakes, we make bad decisions, and we also pick wrong person.

But I am not getting married just because of what people may think or dahil may sinumpaan akong pangako... I further solemnly swear that at all the times and places I will adhere closely to the ethical standards and professional roles of teachers... I am getting married dahil gusto ko. Sino bang ayaw magpakasal?

But you know what, ang iba sa amin, lantaran na nga kung magloko dahil nga riyan sa conotation ng mga tao na 'teacher ka pa naman!' ee ano ngayon?

Everyone have shit to hide so shut up na lang. well, I am not speaking on behalf of them, I am just stating the fact and I am suggesting that in some ways, regulations should be review and perhaps revised if needed to cope up with the new millennium.

"May isang eksena sa center; sabi ng midwife, 'ma'am wala po ba kayong ibang ginagamit na family planning?'sumagot ang nanay na netibo, since malayo sila sa bayan wala pa sigurong RHU na nakarating sa kanila, 'ma'am wala ba ma'am, totoy lang ba alam namin ma'am'." kwento ng speaker na ikinatawa ng fiance ko kaya nabalik ang diwa ko seminar.

Kasama pa pala ang family planning sa seminar?

"Iyang story na iyan ang isa sa mga dahilan kung kaya naisama ng pahapyaw ang family planning sa seminar bago magpakasal. Most people nowadays are nagmamarunong-marunungan, nag-aalam-alaman but only few are knowledgeable. Sa hirap ng buhay ngayon, mas mahirap kung patanga-tanga. Masakit sa pandinig pero totoo noh?"

Yeah right! Sigaw ng utak ko

FAMILY PLANNING. Big word para sa karamihan pero para sa akin, tss. What family to be plan if I can't have one? Asawa lang ang pwedeng maging akin. ASAWA lang. ASAWA lang sapat na.

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A/N: Kinakabahan ako sa plano mo Laarny!

Enjoy reading committers!

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