Shawn Mendes Imagines

73 - Royal Pain In The Ass? AU (part 2)

"You. Did. Not. Just. Do. That." He said, pausing in between the words to jokingly make his voice sound angry.

Before I knew it, he has gotten off the bed in order to get me. I ran away from him, practically going in circles in my gigantic room just to avoid it. But me being me, when it comes to running, I'm either not fast enough or can easily trip over nothing. In this case, he almost caught me which made me trip over my own feet in shock, causing me to fall down onto the light gray carpet with him falling on top of me. He quickly recovered and trapped me in his arms. His fingers soon brushed my sides, causing me to squirm and erupt into a fit of laughter. After several attempts to stop him from tickling me, he finally halted but still hovered over me.

"You have no idea how many times I have imagined being in this scenario with you." He muttered, his deep brown eyes looking at me, from my face to my feet.

"You have imagined me under you in this scandalous position? You perv." I replied, smirking as I tried to ignore the presence of heat rushing from my ears to my cheeks.

"That too. But I prefer the idea of being this close to you."

"Charming. Is that how you got those girls to sleep with you?"

He looked away, not before I saw the pained look in his eyes, and got off me. I shouldn't have said that. God, I'm an idiot! I didn't mean to say it out loud. It's just that I have the tendency of blurting stupid things out when I'm in an uncomfortable position. He bit his lower lip as he sat across from me, against the foot of the bed. His eyebrows were furrowed and one could tell that he was mad and hurt just by how tense his posture was. I pushed myself off the floor and sat up as well, my back against the dresser.

"Is that really all you know me for? Hasn't the past few days been enough to change how you see me as?" He asked, his jaw clenched tight. "Am I seriously just a royal fuckboy to you? I thought you would have seen past that by now! Fuck, I like you, y/n! I was trying to show you that earlier but you keep bringing my past up!"

I just remained silent, guilty for even bringing it up.

"Do you want to know why I did that? I mean, it's obvious that it interests you so much. To make things short, I was a wreck. I felt as if I wasn't good enough, that I shouldn't be alive. I heard that alcohol helps you forget the shit happening around you so I got wasted. Then I thought that maybe taking someone home would also be a good idea since if I do so, pleasure will replace the emptiness inside. None of those fucking worked. I then tried to end my life by taking a dangerous amount of pills but I stopped myself just before it could reach my mouth. I'm a broken piece of shit."

He brought his knees up to his chest and placed his elbows on them as he sobbed into his hands. I slowly moved towards him, my heart aching for him more and more with every second that passes. I placed my hand on his shoulder and took a deep breath as a few tears escaped my eyes.

"Shawn... I-I'm sorry." I said, shakily. "I shouldn't have said that. I'm an idiot. I tend to say things I don't mean when I am placed in a situation I don't know how to respond to. God, I hate myself so much right now."

"I just thought that maybe I erased that idea from your mind by now."

"I'm really sorry. But hey, the past doesn't define who you are now, right? And Shawn, I'm glad you're alive because I can't imagine my life without you. You literally just came in here and turned my bland, black and white life into a colorful mess."

He lifted his head off of his hands, his puffy, red eyes met mine. I gave him a weak smile and moved closer to him. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and brought me to his side. I rested my head against his shoulder as his rested on mine. We sat there in silence as our tears stopped streaming down our cheeks. At this moment, nothing mattered. It was just me and him.