𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥

31; pancakes

"Abigail, you need to wake up." I lifted my head gently of the black leather turning bug eyed, where am I? Feeling it all crash in I groan sitting up remembering the white plastered walls, the detoxified environment, the waterfall of tears, the blood smeared over his face  and the warmth of...

"Where's Zach?"

"He had to go for a meeting he couldn't miss it, he promised he'd be back in a few hours" we'd been dating for only a few days and I feel like one of the worst girlfriends anyone could have, we haven't done anything special and I think both of us were looking forward to being curled up in bed without the boys adding comments every 2 minutes which happened to destroy the intimacy we had in the moment except here I was sleeping on a sofa in a hospital without him. I'd dragged him down this dumb path of the lonely chick who can hardly face her problems and breaks down every day for usually no apparent reason. I'm a shitty girlfriend what was I even thinking when he asked me. What was he thinking when he asked me.?

"Hey what's wrong?" Mabel said sitting down next to me on the black sofa I'd been sleeping for since 11pm last night, the sun beaming in through the little windows across the coffee table.

"I'm a shitty girlfriend Mabs, I don't even know why I am his girlfriend! He's a freaking pop sensation and I'm a nobody!" I sighed a single tear streaming down my face. She shook her head at me,

"Are you serious, you are everything that he's every wants, sure he might have the money, the girls in a sense, the so called high life but you are the the thing he needs now. I've seen you two together, not much, but together and you are probably the first example of soulmates which I didn't believe till now, I'd ever seen. Don't doubt him or yourself darling." Cracking a smile I tug her tighter into a hug. I wanted to run around L.A with her right now, I wanted to go swimming with the boys, I wanted to take pictures for Instagram but I couldn't and it was slowly shredding my insides but she always fixed everything in my head, my outlet on things and spending time on tour without her made me notice it too.

"I looked up shops before, there is a pancake parlour just around the corner, wanna go get some for half an hour?" She asked eying me on the side, I sniffed a little before standing on my tired legs dragging her out of the waiting room the air hitting me like a brick, my soul being revived slowly. The breeze was so cold but the feeling of fresh air on my sticky skin made me feel alive as the past 24 hours I've felt like a ghost, useless, watching, was this how mother has been feeling?

"We will be back as soon as possible" Mabel said skipping up to me, she'd organised time of school for Pa and Me which was ridiculous but I was really grateful as we walked, a little toothless grin on my face away from the hospital to a small cafe which was amazingly close. I could smell the fresh grind of coffee beans, maple syrup and the colours of the quirky people made my vibes and hope grow higher. Pa was strong he could make it, of course he would... I hope.

"It smells amazing in here, wow" I nodded agreeing sitting on a small table by the window, the street was constantly moving cars flying each direction majority without a care for other people. If everyone cared about each other we'd be getting somewhere in society but we don't, we shame each other, don't lend a hand, Why was I going all wisdom on myself, tired? I smiled as the waitress bought us our drinks setting them perfectly down. Staring back out the window I wished for life to be good and stay good for a little while maybe.

"That's was so cute even though you look stressed"

"Huh?" I whisper turning my gaze back to my blonde haired friend, who was passing over her phone. I smiled quickly airdropping it before handing her phone back. Today was the day my instagram would actually see my face on my page, I edited the photo frowning at how blonde my hair looked but continued writing a caption before posting my heart racing, would Zach's fans hate on me? Surely not...