Moment of Silence

Chapter 20.

Songs for this chapter are:

Stay - Miley Cyrus

All Too Well - Taylor Swift

Beneath Your Beautiful - Labrinth

The Lonely - Christina Perri

Chapter 20.

"That's all a girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool."

"Good book?" Zayn's voice snaps me back into reality.

I nod my head and glance back to where the soccer game is. Everyone is so happy.

And then there's me.

"Cool," Zayn sits down next to me and takes a box of cigarettes from his pocket. He places one in between his lips and folds his hands in his lap. I give him a strange look. Why have a cigarette but no lighter?

He chuckles. "Haven't you ever read that book? You put the death stick in your mouth but you don't light it."

I smile. Yes, I've read it. It was a great book. I nod my head as I recognize what he's quoting from.

"You're chill Maybel," he states and takes the cigarette out of his mouth. I smile and try to go back to my book but he just keeps on talking. It's strange because Zayn doesn't seem like a guy who likes to talk. He seems like the quiet one.

"I can tell something's wrong," he hints. My eyes flit to his and for a second I'm mesmerized by his chocolate eyes and long lashes. "I've gone through things too you know," he looks down at his hands and I can see the pain in his eyes.

I want to know what happened. He must see my curiosity. "I'll tell you something I've never told anyone if you tell me what's wrong."

"Come on," he frowns when I don't respond immediately. "You can tell me anything. I promise I won't tell if you don't want me to." He crosses his heart and I smile but instantly frown. My father would always cross his heart to make promises.

Zayn notices my mood swing. "Maybel," he says seriously. "You have something inside that's bugging you. You need to get it out and move on."

I blink. He's exactly right.

He smiles and hands me a notebook. "I got this for you. I thought it might help you express yourself."

I give him a small smile and he hands me a pen. "Let it go, Maybel," he whispers to me before standing up and striding over to Diamond, Michael, and Ashton. I continue to watch him as he takes the same cigarette and sticks it back into his mouth. He glances at me and the corners of his mouth go up the slightest bit.

I sigh and look at the cover of the notebook. It's pure black and I'm sure it reflects what's inside of me.

I close my eyes and lean back. A small tear escapes but I take a deep breath and wipe it away.

I can do this.

---------

Two hours later I'm practically holding my life story in my hands.

I roll my wrist around, trying to get out the kinks. Writing about a whole life takes a lot of work.

The soccer players are wrapping it up on the field and soon they come trotting off.

"Thanks for playing with us Maybel," Niall says as he nears me and wipes his face with his shirt.

I smile a fake smile.

Payton can obviously see I'm faking because she gives me a look. When she gets near me, she whispers, "what's wrong?"

I quickly flip through the filled notebook pages and her eyes widen.

"I'm so proud of you," she whispers and pats my back before leaving with Diamond, Calum, Louis, Michael, Niall, Zayn, and Luke.

The sky is a brilliant orange and I can feel the breeze blowing through my hair, gently rustling the notebook pages.

"Hey Belle," a soft voice says. I turn to see Liam. I give him a genuine smile. He sits next to me and leans back, looking at the sky with me.

"Is Luke good to you?" Liam suddenly asks. I nod in reply.

"Good," Liam says.

We sit in silence for a few minutes, neither of us wanting to ruin the stillness of the brilliant sunset.

"So what's your favorite color?" Liam asks randomly and I nearly jump out of my seat at his randomness.

After I compose myself, I point to the sky. The orange is my favorite color.

"It's gorgeous," he says and looks at me. "Just like you."

I can feel my cheeks heat up.

---------

When the sky gets dark and my eyes lose their shine, I stand up.

I can't take the silence anymore.

I carry my book, notebook, and pen to the elevator, ignoring Liam's protests.

Once I'm in our suite, I look for Zayn. I find him in his room, lying on his bed with his stupid cigarette hanging lazily out of his mouth.

"Did you finish?" He sits up and places his "death stick" on the bedside table.

I nod and sit on the end of his bed. I carefully hand him my notebook.

He immediately opens it and starts to read.

I smile at his hunger.

"You know, when I was eight, they told me I had the reading level of an eighteen year old," he chuckles and continues to read as my eyes go wide.

Soon my eyes grow tired and I drift off, my brain traveling to a place where words come out of my mouth and love pours from my heart.

----------

A/N

Sorry. I'm in kind of a depressing mood.

So there's this guy in my school who is like the biggest douche on Earth.

Our formal dance is coming up and I really want some guy to ask me to it. Knowing the people at my school, I'm pretty sure no one will cause everyone hates me.

Anyone thanks for almost 700!

That's incredible!

Thanks for reading,

-Julia xx

(Ps.

At my funeral,

Don't cry.

I've been dead inside for a long time.)