#18 Something that reminds them of you

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Annie couldn't know that everything would just get worse after your death.

She lets out a quiet but heavy sigh, as she makes her way straight towards the mess hall after a long day of training. The usually focused soldier couldn't think straight all those hours. Her whole body longed to see you between the familiar faces, hoping to get one of your typical smirks. But you weren't there anymore, and you wouldn't never again.

Suddenly Annie stops mid-step. There is a corner right in front of her. Nothing special, huh? For her this corner means the world. After training you did hide behind it to scare the living hell out of your friend. You were very successful, but you had to pay a high price the next day in hand-to-hand combat. And still you didn't learn your lesson, and kept scaring her now and then.

She can almost feel how the broken pieces of her heart start to heal due to the memory. A slight smile tugs at the corners of her mouth, and at the same time tears well in her clear blue eyes. Her life isn't the same without you anymore. Unfortunately, Annie realizes that fact way too late.

The blond soldier catches herself listening up as someone tells a funny joke a few meters away. Hope takes over her grief, while she throws a brief glance over her shoulder. But it isn't you, who is trying to keep the good mood going. Annie can't help herself but see you in everything wherever she goes. She might be cold towards you, but you kept sticking around like a good friend, and she loved every single second of it. Now Annie understands what you meant to her. The place you have in her heart.

"Hey, Annie!", one of the cadets makes his way towards her. Not waiting at all she walks in a straight line towards the mess hall. Her coldness got even worse since you left her. No one could get past her shell like you did, they just can't achieve that anymore. You were something special, and she will keep the memories she made with you close to her heart.


The shy boy stays strong, just like he has promised you.

Against his will Armin's hand shots up to reach for the tiny book in his shirt pocket. He needs to make sure it is still in its place near to his heart. A relieved sigh leaves his mouth as Armin looks up into the clear blue sky. He does hope to see you somewhere on a cloud looking down at him with that sweet smile of yours.

Those pages of this special book are everything he has left from you. It was one of your biggest treasures, so it's now his task to bear this legacy. Armin catches himself taking out said book to look at the tiny pictures of the outer world. Next to them are scribbled single words and quotes.

His fingers travel over them softly like the pages could rip under his touch. Every time Armin slowly loses himself in his grief he takes out the book. For hours he could drown in the memories he made with you. Sometimes the shy boy wishes you would have left him more.

A single tear falls onto the paper of one of the pages. "No, no, no", Armin mumbles over and over again, while he tries to dry the spot with his sleeve. The color of your words gets washed away a little bit, but he still can read everything. He doesn't even notice that tears start to run down his cheeks. They feel natural, when the shy boy thinks about you.

The wound of your loss didn't have enough time to heal up yet. Just like the gigantic hole you left in his heart. Nothing could fill up this space. That special spot was yours. Only yours.

"I'm sorry. I try to be strong, but it really hard sometimes", he mumbles under his tears. "We miss [Y/N], too", Eren puts his hand on the blonde's shoulder. "You are not alone with your grief", Mikasa adds to his statement with a soft smile on her lips.

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