I Don't Wike It: The Cliches and Sterotypes of Wattpad

"The Bad Boy Has My Nudes!"

Honestly, I don't know why she's so worried, because obviously she's hot. She's Mary Sue.

The shortest "nudes" story ever:

I woke up with a terrible hangover. As I rushed to the bathroom to spew the contents of my stomach into the toilet, I swore to never drink again. I mean, it was fun, I guess. Well, actually, I don't remember last night very much, so I'm not sure if it was fun or not.

I finished emptying myself and stood to wash my hands and mouth at the sink. And that's when I got a good look at the bathroom. No bathtub, but a shower instead. This wasn't my bathroom.

I took a few steps and peered into the bedroom. It was gray, and the walls weren't  covered with posters, and there were no teddies to be seen. This wasn't my bedroom.

I looked at the bed. Black comforter. And someone under it. Well, mostly under it. I could see enough of him to know it was a him and he was....naked.

Oh holy crap what happened last night?

"Morning, sweetheart," the him said, shifting into a sitting position. Fortunately, I didn't get a peek at the...thing.

"Where am I, how did I get here, and why am I here?" I demanded, crossing my arms. I looked down at my body, suddenly realizing I was wearing nothing but a large t shirt.

"You're in my room, I brought you here, and..." he smirked, "I'm sure you know why you're here."

"Oh, don't be so smug," I said, glaring at him. He was handsome, despite the God awful smirk on his face. Messy blonde hair, mischievous brown eyes, muscular shoulders, muscular everything else. "Whatever happened last night doesn't count because I was drunk. The alcohol did it, not me. End of discussion."

He shrugged, still smirking. "Fine, whatever you need to tell yourself, sweetheart."

"I believe the name you're looking for is 'Miranda'," I said, seething. I was nobody's sweetheart.

"Whatever, sweetheart," he said, "just tell me this." He leaned over and picked his cellphone up off the floor. He pulled something up on it, then continued, "did the alcohol or you do-" he whipped the screen around to face me "-this?"

My eyes widened in shock as I looked at the picture on the screen. It was me. Drunk. Laughing. Naked. Completely and utterly naked.

"What? How?" I sputtered, lunging across the room in an attempt to snatch the phone from his hand, but he pulled it back, too quick for me.

"So, sweetheart, I have the power to blackmail you," he smirked, "so now you have to do whatever I say."

I glared at him for a moment, weighing my options. I could become his, well, slave, or, I could let him show that picture of me naked to...anyone and everyone he wanted.

It was simple.

"No. I don't have to do whatever you say," I told him, watching in satisfaction as the smirk slowly slipped from his face, "you can show that picture to as many people as you want, I don't care. Because the only thing I'm hiding under my clothes is a bunch of bare skin and an incredibly sexy body. Show it to everyone at school on a giant screen in assembly, I don't care. I'll just stand up and yell, 'yeah, that's right bitches, I look good naked!' Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to find my clothes and go home."

He looked completely and utterly shocked, and I couldn't help smiling a little when my back was turned to him.

It took less than a minute to locate my clothes, put them on and leave. And then my life returned to normal. He never showed the pictures to anyone that I know of. He was probably too embarrassed that his little blackmail plan fell through. Poor boy, haha.

All I can say is, these kinds of stories kind of annoy me, and I wrote this chapter just for the one shot. 😇

Maybe people should start writing it where MC has Mr. Bad Boy Sex God Hot Stuff's nudes and threatens him with them instead of the other way around. It would be more plausible he'd be naked than her, because he's reckless, and MC is usually modest and shy and...anyway. 

But I guess if he's so reckless he wouldn't care if she showed his nudes to everyone...so maybe not nudes, maybe him doing/wearing something that would ruin his annoying macho reputation.

Another alternate would be if MC takes karate or something and beats up Mr. Bad Boy Sex God Hot Stuff and steals his phone, deletes the picture and goes home, leaving him to think about what he did wrong. Or not, violence is wrong.

Don't get naked, folks!