Mekakucity Actors (メカクシティアクターズ) One-Shots

Kano's Stories

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Kano: You want to hear my stories?

1. When I was a kid, old people at weddings always poke me and say .. "You're next." I was very annoyed. I mean, daaaaamn. I was still a kid! Old people gotta learn! I mean I was still young and they were already old so, I started doing the same thing to them at funerals. I just told them the horrible truth.

2. I'm also quite irritated with the employees at restaurants. They all be like "Would you like a table?" It's as if I don't need one eh? So I once said "No. Not at all. I came here to eat on the floor. Carpet for five please."

3. I got into detention because our principal thought I was cheating! So I said to my seatmate at detention, "Our principal is so stupid. He thought I was cheating when I really wasn't! Old man's gotta fix his rusty brain!" I laughed very hard while my seatmate didn't even give any reaction. "Don't you know who I am?" He glared at me. "Uhm.. No?" . "I'm his son." . "How come you're here then, if you're the principal's son?!" He chuckled. "A teacher sent me to detention. My father is probably teaching him a lesson now." I gulped. "Do you know who I am?" I asked. And he replied, "No." I looked at him and said "Good." I ran away from detention. Although the next day, I had three hours detention. Good thing that the son of a principal (you see what I did here?) wasn't there anymore.

4. There was this one time when I couldn't sleep at night. So I asked my heart. Heart replied, "Because you slept in the afternoon. Don't act like you're in love all the time." I rolled my eyes and replied, "Right.."

5. Big sis told me this. When I was seven years old... I walked over to a pregnant woman while we were in the hospital. Dad was having a check up that time. I asked why the pregnant woman's stomach was big. She said "I'm having a baby." I then asked the woman again, "Is the baby in your stomach?" The pregnant woman replied "Yes it is." I was quite confused so I asked again, "Is it a good baby?" The pregnant woman nodded and said "Yes. A really good baby." I was shocked and surprised so I had to ask, "Then why did you eat him?"

I don't really know what's going on with my mind right now. XD