>be me
>be 19
>at drug deal
>trading chews for injectors
>guy is really big and has bodyguards
>i hand him my case and he hands me his
>they open mine and see my goods
>they start yelling and tackle me
>i ask what theyre doing
>they throw stuff onto ground and the Shrek vitamins spill everywhere
>he asks what this crap is
>i say theyre the best chewables around
>he tells guards to ruff me up and see if i get serious
>i yell he will be sorry for disgracing the ogrelord
>he turns and puts a knife to my chin
>i look him in the eye and am not scared
>he pulls knife to swipe and i do what i must
>i pray to Shrek
>blade comes down but is blocked by onion
>bodyguards are ripped away from my shoulders
>drug lord screeches and runs a way
>i turn around to see a mangled ball of human parts held by his onioniness
>the ogrelord rolls the ball at leader like a bowling ball
>it hits and crushes him
>leg bone is out of skin after ball rolls over
>Shrek rips bone out of leg and man screams
>his onioniness breaks bone in half and shoves halves into mans noseholes
>man stops screaming as bones break surface of his cranium
>the ogrelord rips off his head and brings it to me
>drops it on the ground and says "shape up laddeh"
>his onioniness breaks through the concrete next to me and im showered with dust
>have i upset the ogrelord
>Shrek is love
>Shrek is life
YOU ARE READING
Shrek is Love Shrek is Life
FanfictionI am blessed to have had Shrek be a part of my life. Shrek has done so many wonderful things in my life that I can't remember them all in a coherent order. These are my fragmented memories of the ogrelord. Shrek is love. Shrek is life.
