The Ex-Wife of Chris Goldman

25 - Days After

Day 1 - Christmas Day

I stay in bed, dragging myself out to put on a smile and watch Sylvianna open her gifts from Santa. Shortly after we eat brunch - that Jackie made, she's amazing and Chris is lucky to have a mom like her - I go back to our room and climb into bed. It's Kimmys birthday today, I cry. I cry for Kimmy, I cry for Emmadette, I cry for Charlie, and I cry for the worst news of all. I may never be able to have another child, the tests they ran yesterday showed me having a hostile uterus and having a baby could harm both of us. I cry all day until Chris comes and gets me for Christmas dinner, I clean myself up and go downstairs once again putting on a happy face for Sylvianna. She plays with me and I struggle through a game of dollies and tea.

Day 5 - Work Struggles (Pediatric Surgeon)

I took off of work as long as possible, but I knew at some point I had to come back in. I pull into my parking spot, unbuckle my seatbelt, and open the car door. My legs freeze, I can't do this, I can't, my memories here are all bad. I close the door, buckle my seatbelt, and pull out of the parking spot. Today is not the day I go back to work, I get back home before Chris leaves for his work. He gives me a solemn look and nods. He'll call my work for me, they know what's wrong and will hopefully understand. I can't put it of forever I have patients.

Day 27 - Sylvianna Moments

I look at the clock, 2:56. I've been in bed all day, I hired a nanny - Meredith - to care for Sylvianna. I hear the door crack open

"Mama." I hear

"I'm sorry Mrs. She wanted to see you and refused to nap without seeing you."

"Thanks Meredith, she can come here."

Meredith sets Sylvianna on the bed and walks out of the room

"Mama sad." She poke my nose with a finger

"Yes, baby. Mama is very sad."

"Why?" She tilts her head slightly and holds her hands by here face.

"Remember Baby? She went to visit my mommy and daddy in heaven with aunt Abby."

"She okay? I share you mama. You can visit her sometimes, play tea and dollies."

I blink back tears, that has to be the sweetest thing I heard from her. She doesn't fully understand, we told her what happened that baby sister went with Abby but it hasn't really seemed real, nothing does for a small child.

"You can share me some other time, for now I'm the cuddle monster and I want lots of hugs and kisses."

I pull her into me holding her close, tickling her, and kissing her head. She tickles me back and I laugh. I realize it's the first time I've laughed since Emmadette. I hear the door open and Chris peers in, he smiles at the sight. I smile back and he nods. I think we both know this means it's time for me to go back to work.

Day 28 - Back to work

Today's the day, the day I finally have to go back to work. I pull into my parking spot, unbuckle my seatbelt, and open the car door. My legs freeze, I can't do this, I can't, my memories here are all bad. I think to myself, geeez this is like a repeat of a few weeks ago. I get out of the car, grab my coffee, and walk slowly into the hospital. I head to my office, oh did I mention that I am the head of the Pediatrics department. I set my stuff down and look around, I look at the files on my desk, grab the first one and walk to the room."

"Hi, Mrs Friel, I'm Dr. Goldman and I will be in charge of your twins case while they are here."

"No, no. They aren't mine, I'm a social worker who's been assigned to them for this process. I'm trying to find an adopting home but it's hard when you have two babies that both need heart transplants. Call me Isabel."

"Oh, Isabel, I'm sorry for the mistake. It's my fault, it's my first day back."

"Welcome back, I've heard great things about you and your work. The heart doctor, umm what's his name..... Oh yeah, Dr. Khi he's been telling me all about you."

"I'm glad to hear he didn't scare you off, now I need to check these guys out and make sure everything's good. Baby A has a heart on its way from New Jersey and it should be here today, and Baby B well we are still searching. Do they have names I call them instead of A and B."

"Yes, the one on the left is Abernathy Leigh and the one on the right is Lisbeth Elaine or that's what I have been calling them."

"I love those names, did you choose them?"

"Yes, but whenever they get adopted the couple can and probably will rename them, it's hard to get them adopted nobody wants minority twins with heart issues."

"How old are they?"

"7 months today, born on June 21st."

I pick up Lisbeth and rock her in my arms, she smiles and let's out a little coo. Isabel smiles

"You know, that's the first time she's looked happy since we arrived."

"She's perfect." I set her back down once she falls asleep, and I give Abernathy a gently pat on the arm. "I'll be back to check in later."

I walk out of the room, check on a few more patients and when it's my break I call Chris.

"Hey, everything okay? Not to stressed are you?"

"No, work is fine. I have a small surgery later but I have something to ask you."

"Go for it."

"Are you willing to consider adoption?"

"What do you mean? Like someone else's baby?"

"Look, I knew it was a long shot. I just wanted to see if you would consider it." From my office I can see into the twins room and I smile "Forget I asked, I'll let you get back to whatever your doing."

"Wait, I'm willing to talk about this. Okay?"

"Okay. Tonight?"

"Or on your lunch break. I don't have anything major the rest of the day and I honestly can't take this stuffy office much more today."

"Okay, I have a 45 minute lunch at 2:30. See you then."

"See you,"

The line goes silent and I put my phone on my desk, I grab my cap and head down the the O.R. after this surgery I can talk to Chris.

----
Please please please comment and give feedback. I want to know what y'all think!