How to Survive South Park

A New Kind of Game

Several hours have passed since the battle with the Time Patrollers. I escaped to another timeline alongside Red once I grabbed Zenon and my weapon in the works along with all the stuff I'm using to upgrade them with.

The time portal she made for us led us to a castle in hell or 'Citadel of Doom' as she calls it where she seems to be the big boss around here. At least the tour was decent enough despite all the self praise littered throughout getting old after the first tenth of it.

I was also mentally tearing T.K. a new one for not getting rid of a certain design flaw that fucked it over in canon and nearly fucked us over here.

'RULE #25, T.K: NO MATTER HOW WELL IT WOULD PERFORM, NEVER CONSTRUCT ANY SORT OF MACHINERY WHICH IS COMPLETELY INDESTRUCTIBLE EXCEPT FOR ONE SMALL AND VIRTUALLY INACCESSIBLE VULNERABLE SPOT!!!'

(("Taking inspiration from the 'Things I'll do if I ever become an Evil Overlord' list sounds a little hypocritical, host."))

'WE FUCKING DIED BACK THERE, T.K! DIED! AND WHO KNOWS HOW MUCH WORSE THINGS COULD'VE GOTTEN IF IT WASN'T FOR RED RESURRECTING US RIGHT AFTER!'

I figured that his robot pride would need a mouth to mouth after the complete embarrassment that was the first part of our last fight, but from the looks of things, my A.I. partner is now more sarcastic than ever before.

Perhaps the dark angel's spell didn't completely fix the damage done.

(("It did; I triple checked to make sure that spell holds no influence over us. I am also currently working on fixing that originally built-in design flaw by integrating the main CPU with-")) Don't care. Just get it done, please.

She also seemed to have hundreds of her 'shadows' around the castle though most were pretty weak (at least compared to us) and just keeping things neat and tidy.

Looks like she doesn't keep all of them on herself... literally.

We chatted for a while as I continued working on Zenon and Dragonsbane through T.K. and Red got her massage which I may have gotten a little jealous over and got one of as well once my new 'partner' was finished.

It looked really comfortable and I was a giant ball of stress after almost dying again, okay?

(("Do you want me to alter the part of your brain that-")) No, T.K. No.

Turns out she is one of the Time Patrollers top 10 most dangerous enemies in their eyes which have been dubbed 'Time Terrors' by that organization and she has been fighting against them for ages now while slowly building her own army up in the process like she's in some kind of tycoon game.

The main reason she's such a big threat is obviously her ability in Phone Destroyer that has a few more special functions then what's shown in the game, making it insanely OP.

Whoever she uses it on has to be very close to death, but not when they are dead or it won't work. That person then gets quickly killed and resurrected which fully heals their body, stamina, and soul and even gets any tools or weapons they had when they first started out in that state (like in Phone Destroyer) regardless of the state they were in when the spell was used.

As for differences, the people Red does this too kind of become like the Shadows in Solo Leveling which this Red seems to be a huge fan of. They become fiercely loyal to the spell caster and the stronger one is, the more of a personality they develop.

That along with the small boost in power they get and the personality shift towards the evil side of the DND alignment chart (while also becoming fanatically loyal) reminds me of the Majin boost from Dragon Ball. Not exactly the perfect power-up to get, all things considered. Thank fuck for T.K, or I would've been a slave to her whim after getting hit with that spell; telepathy and cleansing powers be damned!