Mine (HOOD) [COMPLETED]

34; Always on my mind

Calum's POV

Since the album is out, the band and I have been to malls to do album signings and appearing on shows to talk about the album, not to mention radio shows in different cities. I am so fucking tired but it's so fucking worth it, cause I get to see the 5SOS Fam and personally thank them for supporting us since the start. Without them, honestly I do not know where I'll be right now. Gosh, maybe I would work in Mcdonalds or in a a boutique or some suck-ass job that I would hate. I have tons of love for my fans, but yeah of course I understand that aside of loving our music, they love me and the band as people and that means so much to me. Cause who we are inspires our music, so yeah, do not be surprised if there is a song about being silly assholes cause that's just who we are!

But God, I miss Tommy so much! My pride and joy, Thomas my son. I miss his smile, his laugh and even watching him play with his toys cause he would be so engrossed with it. I always try to call Tommy everyday, but I was so tired a few days ago and ended up calling late at night a day after, and shit, I hate to admit it but talking to Shay makes everything seems okay. I know that she has a lot on her plate right now, and even she can erupt any minute but she always have a way to make me feel that I'm handling everything okay, maybe not great, but I'm alright and that makes me sleep well at night.

The band and I are on our way to this radio show in Dallas, Texas. Gosh, why there is have to be a town named after her last name? A constant reminder that I do not have her is just heartbreaking.

"Cal, this town is named Dallas. Don't you want to call her and how much you are in love with her?", Micheal teased me and he is obviously not helping to make me feel better.

"Shut up, Micheal. You know I can't do that, why do I want to waste my energy on someone that doesn't even want me", I told him but then Luke interfered.

"Dude, she wants you! She told you but she didn't want to want you which is total bullshit. Even I do not know what that means, if you want something then go for it!", then Ashton rolls his eyes at Luke, like always.

"That is why you're still single, Hemmings. She doesn't want to be with Calum cause she doesn't want Calum to break her heart again. She rather has someone else break her heart, but not Calum, not again. It hurts too much", Ashton words just made me not in the mood, but Luke said something that made sense.

"Doesn't that mean Calum is special to her? Why resist? Calum is a great guy, I mean look at him!", he pats my back. "Unique asian looks, but not asian which makes him more unique. Chubby cheeks, how many guys has chubby cheeks?! Great body, look at those biceps! And he's in a band where millions of girls are falling for this motherfucker, but he still wants her, Shay Dallas! That shows he's not just a guy with great looks, he's a fucking gentleman! I just don't quite get why she has to complicate things and push him away when he's the best chance she has to be happy for the rest of her life?"

"She's scared, Luke", I told him softly.

"God! So afraid of her own feelings? That sounds stupid. I love her to bits, but she's stupid", Luke express his disagreement on point.

"Girls are complicated, man. Don't you know that? Rachel is one complicated tart, she can be so fun one second and be such a total bitch the next and when she's expressing her feelings about her work, she would say these stuffs that doesn't even make sense. One thing I learned that when she has a bad day, she would babble about the most stupid things, like how I don't deserve her cause she can't be this laid back and fun girl 24/7 cause she has her job and she actually loves her job, and she feels like she's neglecting me at some times which I find is bogus. She would just talk and talk and talk, until she will lose her ground and I have to pull her back down and snap some sense into her", Ashton explains.