Another Door Opens

37 - Since when did you become a sex therapist?

Thankfully, today, there is no one else in yet this morning seeing as we started early for a team meeting over breakfast to discuss the changes that are about to take place with Luna winding back her hours. So early, in fact, that I actually skipped my first boxing class since I started, and on some level in my mind, I know I’m actively refusing to unpack the guilt I’m feeling for it. Primarily because it means I also probably have to acknowledge why I feel a hint of shame about my date last night when I imagine having to next come face to face with Miles, which I know I have no logical reason to be feeling, but which is persisting regardless.

“The vagina was well pleased last night, and that’s all you’ll be hearing on the matter,” I said, dismissing Heath’s protests that I was a tease and needed to provide further details.

“For once---even though it pains me terribly---I agree with the boy,” Luna said, surprising us both in siding with Heath. “I don’t actually want the sex details, but tell us about him. What’s he like? What does he do? How did he treat you? All that side of things.”

“Aren’t we supposed to be meeting now?” I deflected unsuccessfully, realising I had no choice but to give them something. That’s probably why Luna is pushing for it, because for once I’m keeping things quiet instead of loudly lamenting my failures. “I dunno. We went out for drinks. He was nice. Charming. He made me laugh heaps. Super cute. Works in sound production. Fucking fantastic in bed.”

“How thoroughly detailed,” Heath said sarcastically. “Come on, Eden. Give us a little more at least, focussing more so on the fantastical sex skills. You owe us that much for making us listen through all the other losers.”

Fair point.

“Uh… his name is Austin,” I said, knowing I have no choice but to give some more insights into him. “He's a cat person, which is usually a no-no for me. The only cat I like is Nella and Mason's cat Wisp because she is the most chill, sweet, lazy thing that ever existed.” Nella giggled as she got up to unlock the front door and collect the bag of pastries and tray of coffees that one of the waitresses from the café next door just delivered for our breakfast. 

“He's gorgeous. He seems interesting. He has passions, which aren't the same as mine; but the fact he has interests and hobbies in his life is so appealing to me. I like when people get excited about the things they love. Even more so when they want to share that with someone else. Passion is a beautiful and powerful thing, and I want to live both beautifully and powerfully. I need those things in my life nowadays after living so long without them.”

That seemed to shut them all up a bit. For a while at least.

We consumed our breakfast, convened our meeting, and got to work, but it wasn’t long before Luna raised the topic of Austin once again, apparently unable to let it go.

“You seem pretty taken by this guy, Eden,” Luna said while she swept the floor around my seat unnecessarily after I’d finished applying the foils in one of her old/my new clients’ hair. The client was on a brief toilet break, and I haven’t even picked up my scissors for there to have been a reason for Luna to be sweeping the floor around me, so this is a very calculated move on her part.

“I didn’t expect to be, but it was so nice to connect with someone on first meeting them. The whole night was just really effortless and natural. I don’t know how to describe it, but I like him.”

“You’ve been checking your phone at every available opportunity all morning,” she persisted, perhaps wanting to confirm that it was Austin’s texts I was reading.

“And you’ve been uneasy about it all morning, it would seem,” I said, grabbing the broom out of her hand to keep her from sweeping nothingness any longer, and just come out with it instead.

“I don’t want to be,” she said, looking guilty while resting her now idle hands across her stomach.

“Then why are you, honey? I thought you would have been happy that I finally found one I actually like?”

“I am happy for you, babe. I want you to find the happiest partnership imaginable, and I know that whoever that person is when the time comes will never understand just how lucky they are to have you,” Luna said, her voice breaking ever so slightly with what I’m sensing is apprehension and fear of what she’s about to follow that sentence with. “But I want you to go slow with him. I’ve watched you, my sensitive, Piscean queen, give that heart over to people too soon in the past, and I know how much it hurts you when it doesn’t work out the way you want it to.”

“I promise I’m not giving him anything yet, Luna. My heart remains my own and definitely will for a while yet. But I had a really fun time last night. I like him.”

“I know you do, babe. That’s why I’m worried. I remember what happened when you last liked someone so quickly and giggled at your phone as often as you have today, and it makes me nervous… Just please be careful. Good sexual chemistry from the very beginning has a tendency to mask other issues under the guise of high compatibility.”

Despite being banished from making further enquiries regarding the sexual details of my evening earlier in the day, Heath was obviously listening nearby as he collected the wet hand towels from everyone’s stations to put on a new load of washing, and turned around to insert his two cents on the matter.

“Since when did you become a sex therapist? I could have used some of this wisdom when I was still choking on cock, living on the streets and getting into abusive relationships with aggressive, narcissistic tops,” Heath said, looking genuinely stunned at Luna’s guidance.

Luna rolled her eyes at him almost as dramatically as his own statement move, and he didn’t seem to appreciate it. “Firstly, don’t steal my moves,’ he said, shaking his finger at her pointedly while I tried to stifle my own laughter at them. “And secondly, I’m serious. That actually made a lot of sense. Where has this sage wisdom been hiding, and why didn’t you ever tell me that?”

“I did,” Luna growled, terrifyingly and quietly so the others couldn’t hear her. “Many, many fucking times.”

My natural glow after a successful evening was marred by Luna’s apprehension. If Nella felt the same, she hid it much better than Luna did, who’s always been a lot more transparent with her facial expressions. She has less of a poker face than I do.

It got under my skin, making me wonder whether she has a point. After all, only yesterday morning I was lamenting how unfair it was that Miles is Wolfe's friend and therefore off limits. Thinking about him again now, after my date with Austin, I know I'm still undeniably drawn to him, and probably always will be. It's hard not to be.

But I now also have another cute man wanting to take me out for a second night in a row, who didn't hesitate to jump on the opportunity to do so. 

There's been nothing but hesitation with Miles, which, yes, is likely Wolfe related, but still. All he really would have needed was to say the word and I'd probably have forgotten all about Wolfe and just leaned into my attraction to him, consequences be damned.

Maybe we're just not meant to happen. 

And maybe Austin and I are, because when he offers to take me out to dinner the very night after our first date, bringing with him a bouquet of flowers, I'm stunned and humbled, because I can't remember the last time someone brought me flowers that didn't involve someone close to me dying or my birthday, and I don't recall someone ever pulling my seat out or holding the door open for me like he did either. 

It was nice. Weird and wholly unnecessary, for sure. But nice all the same. And it continued over the next couple weeks whenever I saw him again, which I did a fair few times, culminating in a discussion about where we saw this thing between us heading. He said he could easily see something between us long-term, and my heart sang because it felt nice to be wanted again by someone not crazy.

Especially someone out on a mission to make me cum.