The Unforgivable (Book #1)

Chapter 54: Worse

Enzo left about 10 minutes ago to take care of everything, since then Luca has been a mess he yelled at everyone and we got kicked out. I took him back to a hotel where he ordered a bottle of whiskey for himself. He's been drinking it ever since and I'm here watching him. I've never seen him cry not since little kids but he has always put up this wall not even for mom's funeral he cried. 

"She didn't deserve to die like this" he says looking at his empty glass while his tears keep falling. "She had been tortured for days! She didn't deserve this! She suffered her whole life just for her to die suffering! How am I going to live without her" he cries more. He goes for the bottle again but I step in "Hey I think that's enough you've had two bottles and as much as you want to drown yourself in alcohol it won't bring her back" I tell him but he shakes his head "No I don't care! For fucking hell give me the damn bottle! You won't fucking tell me how to feel about my dead wife!" he yells at me and grabs the bottle. I decide to just give him the space he clearly needs. I wish there was something I could say to make him feel better. I go to my room and call our pilot that we would leave tomorrow at 7am. I change and fall asleep it's been a long day.

I wake up and shower to go check on Luca. He passed out there on the couch with the empty bottle on his hand and I look at the coffee table where the envelope Enzo gave him is untouched. I move him to wake him up and told him to go shower that we would leave to Spain to give her family the news. He doesn't say anything, he just stands up and goes to his room. 

We arrived to Spain 30 minutes ago, we are outside Victoria's family house and it seems that Luca doesn't want to go. "I can't" he tells me shaking his head looking down "how do I tell her father that the promise I made him when we married of protecting her, I failed that she's dead" his voice breaks at the end and he runs his fingers through his hair frustrated  "How do I tell them that I'm also dying, that without her it feels like there is no more fucking air, tell me how!" he says loudly. I look at him "They are the only ones who will understand your pain and will understand" I tell him and he takes a breath and gets out the car. 

I've been waiting in the living room, he went into Lorenzo's office with him to tell him. I feel awkward here with her family knowing that the minute Lorenzo comes out and tells them she's dead. The longer they take in there the more anxious I get with everything, it almost feels like this isn't real. I feel like at any moment I'll wake up and this will just be a terrible dream. I'm put out of my thoughts by the door of the office opening and Luca comes out first but Lorenzo doesn't "Let's go Dom" he says with bloodshot eyes, I'm guessing this was hard for both of them. 

We are now in the car on our way to the airport to go back to Italy. Bianca still doesn't know, she'll be devastated, her and Victoria had become pretty good friend over the months she was with us. I even grew to love her already not in the mornings she was always moody. As I sit here thinking about her, I look at my brother who is lost in his own world. Probably wishing the same as me, that this was just a bad dream. I'm walking upstairs when I see Bianca coming out of here room "Hey you guys are back, how was the trip? What did Enzo want this time?" she said with a smile on her face. "It was okay, tomorrow I'll tell you about it I'm tired" I tell her, unable to tell her the truth or to wipe her smile off.  "Okay I'm going to go check up on Luca" she goes on but I stop her "Oh he said that he didn't want any distractions that he had a lot of work to do and you know how he is." She says okay and goes back to her room. 

I finally lay down but I can't stop thinking about how Luca was panicked in the car on our way to the hospital. I remember he was drenched in her blood, so much blood all over the place. I remember hearing her whizzing for air, she wanted to say goodbye but Luca didn't let her. I wonder what's in the letter Enzo gave Luca, I wonder if he has read it yet, I wonder how it must feel to lose the one person who brought you back to life. She slowly changed him into that big brother I loved when we were little. The one who protects his loved ones above anything, the one who started to smile and laugh more around people. God even our men started to love Victoria by how she changed the "Boss". 

I wonder now that she isn't here will he go back to the man he was before her or worse?