Sofía

Group home

May 20th, 2010. Thursday. New York City, NY.

Sofía's pov:
Today is not going to be a good day, I just know it.

First, Elliot did nothing for a good two weeks so I actually enjoyed school during that time, kinda; but then the principal and teachers stop caring about it cause well nothing was happening, so he started saying and doing stuff again, except the gum in the hair part cause that could've been very noticeable now. He does keep pushing me to the floor during lunch time sometimes, but I usually have pants on so you can't see the slight bruises on my knees.
I don't want to tell anyone about it, what if the same thing happens? They just pretend to care about it but they do nothing. I haven't even told Mama, I know I should but I don't know if I want to. School is over in a month, I bet I can take it until then, it's ust one month more.

Then, the other thing is today, after school, I'm moving somewhere else.

Mama explained everything to me while on the phone two days ago, and the Ms. Edith explained it as well, but part of me still doesn't understand why it has to happen.
This what Mama said:

~Okay Sofí, I need you to listen very carefuly so you understand. Remember I told you we had to send a looot of papers and documents as part of the process of adopting you?~

~Yes Mama~

~Well, most of the documents were accepted, except for one that keeps getting send back cause there is something wrong with my official ID, like there's a letter more or a letter less or something, but we are already fixing it and hopefully the accept it this time. Anyways, now the actual process, as I was told, is going to start, and for that you need to start getting out of the foster care system, so, baby, you are gonna move to a group home on thursday, you will no longer be living in that apparment with that foster parent, instead you are gonna live in a house type bulding not far away from where you are living now , with a lot of other kids, way more then now, okay?~

~No! Why do I have to? I wanna be wich you~ I scream starting to cry.

~I know you do Sofí, I want you to live with me as well, but this is just for a little while and then we can see each other again, I promise you~

~I-I can't see you?~

~Oh sweetie... Not this weekend, no, I'm sorry. But next week we can go to get lunch, someone has to be with us, but we'll be able to see each other, I know you don't like it, to be honest me neither but it's what we have to do so this happens~

~I don't wa-want to move so-somewhere is n-not home, I-I want my room~ I say low but crying.

On Mama's apparment I have my own room, we even went once to the store and bought a lot of different things to decorate it, like a lamp and toys and little animal figurines, I also got to pick new blankets and covers, one with starts, like the space, and the other one purple; we had plans of painting the walls as well and maybe draw something on them. I want to do that, not move somewhere I don't know out of nowhere.

~I know it sucks wormy, I know, but you'll be fine, I promise. And I promise I'll do everything I can to make this process as fast as it can be. Do you trust me?~

~I do Mama, I love you~

~I love you too, to the moon and beyond~

And now I'm walking back to the apparment for the last time, not really that I'll miss the place but I don't know, it's weird. I finished packing last night, ot that I have that many things because I like to keep the new things at Mama's, those are safer there.
Ms. Edith is going to pick me up in 30 minutes, then she is taking me first to the library to return some books and then to the group home.

May 25th, 2010. Tuesday. New York City, NY.

The group home sucks!

I've been here basically 6 days now, and I want to get out of here. First, there are way too many kids, in total we are 15 kids, and I'm the youngest, everybody else is above 13 years old, they are all in highschool, almost everybody. Also I'm not allowed to go out, which in part I get it cause I'm 6 years old, but I miss going to the library whenever I wanted, it's not like I don't know how to cross the street or how to differentiate a green light from a red one. The only new thing I've been able to read is this book thing about group homes that i found on the main office. What I learned is that usually this homes are for an specific group of kids, like pregnant teenagers or kids with mental health disorders or simply troubled kids, and the one I'm in has some of the last one. I heard some teens here where close to going to... juve I think is what they call it.
For all of this, we have a time for everything, a schedule for everything. We wake up at 6:30 (because the highschoolers start classes at 7:30), we have breakfast, I leave for school at 7:40, I have to be back before 3, do homework from 3-4:30 pm, then we have to do chores, then we have dinner at 6:30 (very early) and then I have to be at bed by 8 pm. 
The problem is not what I have to do, cause I already did all of it, but the times is what bothers me, I can't do anything that's not scheduled, if I finish homework early I have to remain sitted and wait for the time to finish, so I get booored. I don't even have new books and I can't borrow from the others cause theirs are too difficult for me, I'm advanced at reading but not highschool advanced.

I've been spending my free time just drawing and crying or talking with Mama and crying. I want to see her, I miss her. We are getting lunch on thursday but a person from foster care or the adoption, I don't remember, is going to be there, so it's not going to be the same.

Hello!!!

The amount of reaserch I've done for this book hahaha, I just want to try to make it as accurate as possible to the real world.

The drama is starting to happen and there's more to come! I just hope I can properly write what I have in mind.

Hope you are having, or had, and amazing day <3