I lied," I say still looking at his lips, he opens his eyes and gazes over at me.
"Uh oh," he whispers, not breaking eye contact. I am suddenly aware of his lingering stare. He looks at me everywhere, every inch, there was no hiding from it. His ga...
I WISHED THAT IT WOULD SNOW AGAIN. The streets were left wet from the melted mushy black snow. The winter sun was melting it fast, buildings dripped and dropped from the melting snow. Some landed on my head and slipped down my coat, making me shiver.
I wish that it would snow again, I liked the way it looked outside with snow. Without it, the busy streets were grey and colorless. The snow at least made it pretty. Never mind the snow Ezra, focus.
I have not been right since Friday. It was so incredibly fucked up that I had the best kiss of my life and I would never get to do it again, and I didn't even know why. Nora had put up a tight defense wall, and would not let me in.
Nora was resisting me, she couldn't just kiss me like that and then tell me we were friends. I don't want to be friends with her, I can't. I see her as way more than a friend, I was being selfish. I knew I was, but she was driving me fucking insane.
The hot and cold, the yes and no. She said we can be a thing, she was teasing me, playing with. She said I was her favorite pastime. Hearing that out of her mouth after a kiss like that was a punch in the gut. It shouldn't have hurt my feelings, but it did.
Pastime, huh?
I felt the way her body responded to me, the way she leaned into me and pined for me, the way her body melted into mine, my name on her lips. If that's what a pastime meant to her, maybe it wasn't so bad. I needed to know if she wanted me the same way I want her.
Even still I didn't know what to do, didn't know my next move or how to look at her without longing. I hadn't texted her because I assumed she wanted her space, I was secretly hoping she'd text me, but she was as stubborn as a tick.
That left me with her friend, Danielle. I may have lurked through Nora's social media to find her friend, but I was desperate. I wanted to ask Nora to the winter ball, but I wanted to make it special, I really didn't know that much about Nora, I hated to admit it. I would change that, I wanted to know everything and then some.
Danielle helped me plan, I spoke to her on the phone to try and get some ideas. I was scared Nora would say no, even after all the planning. She'd tell me she doesn't like high school dances or that she didn't like me that way. If she said no, I promised i'd stop pursuing her, if only to spare myself the heartache.
I spent all week gathering everything I would need to ask her, I would make the night special, I wouldn't ask her until the very end of the night, maybe even seal the deal with a kiss.
My stomach twisted and turned in knots just thinking about it. I never was this romantic with any girl, never tried this hard, I didn't know if that was a good thing or bad thing.
