Twisted Love | James Potter

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Queue 'Sleep On The Floor' by The Lumineers:

Finally reaching the top of the stairs to the Astronomy Tower I stumbled into the open room and sank down the wall near the entrance door, lifting the bottle to my lips. I took a sip, accidentally letting the bottle linger there for a moment too long and the liquid began to seep down my chin.

Quietly cursing I set down the bottle and wiped my chin with my sleeve, not that many people knew, or really cared, but I had an odd obsession with Astronomy, it was one of my main regrets not choosing the class this year but with me being a Perfect and the new Quidditch captain I guess it was for the best.

Letting my eyes roam across the sky I leaned my head back as I brought the bottle back to my mouth.

Most people thought that my infatuation with Lily was a joke, and it kind of was, I would over exaggerate the flirting or be overly obnoxious sometimes just to annoy her but I have always liked her, love was a strong word, the word had always scared the shit out of me, it brought way too many complications into your life and one of those being heartbreak which I never wanted to deal with, so I never chose to admit I was in love with her, but that was also the hard truth for me, I loved Lily Evans and I had always loved Lily Evans since the moment I saw her and Snivellous on the Hogwarts Express.

The thing that truly hurt the worst was the fact that near the end of fifth year her and I had actually began to get close, over summer break when Sirius and I decided to throw the Before School party at our house I had persuaded Lily to join, her and I ended up on the loveseat in the corner drunkenly professing random secrets until she finally got annoyed with me falling over my words and shut me up, Lily kissed me that night, and then boom, the next morning it was like nothing happened and I have somehow learned to live with it, she acts so unaffected yet every night before I slept that memory would reply over and over, except for last night, for some reason instead of aubron hair and green eyes I saw platinum blonde and silver.

The pathetic part was that I actually thought I had a chance with her, I genuinely believed that Lily Evans would finally say yes to me, but then reality hit me like a damn train, Lily Evans was just drunk that night, Lily Evans doesn't give two shits about me, and Lily Evans is with fucking Amos Diggory, I really hoped that I read the situation wrong, that, that wasn't what Marlene was telling me, but hope has truly been my worst enemy here lately.

Choosing to get up I grabbed the almost empty bottle and walked around the rails, letting my hand glide across the rusted metal as I observed my surroundings, looking up I let my eyes fall over all the stars, finding the Equuleus constellation I let my gaze wander a little lower until my breath hitched ever so slightly, looking straight at the Delphinus constellation I began to remember that the Northern constellation of Delphinus was best viewed in Fall during the month of September, meaning I had a perfect view of it from where I was.

Beginning to think of the blonde I leant my elbows on the not so sturdy rusted metal railings, I genuinely didn't know what was going on with me, I just felt the random need to know her, just the small details like her favorite color, favorite Quidditch team, favorite class, just the dumb little facts, basically anything that would help get me a step closer on getting to know her.

Unknowingly I began to lean more into the railing until my full body weight was relying on the thin metal, and before I knew it I heard that noise that made my heart drop and face pale, not having enough time to look down at the railing to identify the loud snapping sound I felt the metal jerk forward.

Before I could even think to push off of the railing I felt someone grip the back of my buttoned school shirt and yank me back, since I wasn't exactly sober or stable I fell back easily leading my bottle to drop and land into the courtyard under the tower.