Loving the Fighter

121

Trigger warnings for child abuse, blood, and mentions of rape.

Jax's POV

Ryder and I lay in the same position, the only difference is I had pants on now.

My hand plays with his hair as he lay tensely on top. His fingers traced a few of my scars but I keep myself from looking down at his back.

I was surprised when I took off his shirt earlier. I thought he would have scars everywhere but there wasn't anything. His body language these past few months definitely said that he was hiding them somewhere though, and considering I just saw every part of him except his back, that must be where they were.

I didn't want to just take a cheap look while we were lying like this though. I wanted him to show me because he wanted to, not because I saw them after we fooled around.

"Where did this one come from," he asked as he traced over one of the older scars on my chest. I didn't have to look down to know which one he was talking about.

"That one was actually my own stupid fault," I admit with a small chuckle as I shift his body closer to the other side where my tattoo was. If he was on top of it, he couldn't see what it covered. "Kyle convinced me to hang out with him at some old timey cemetery on Halloween when we were younger, before fighting got too intense. It had one of those spiky gates and we got scared and ended up jumping the fence instead of running through the gate. I didn't jump high enough so I kind of body rolled over it and my shoulder got snagged."

"What ever it was must have been pretty scary if it scared both of you," he said seriously.

"Oh yea. It was terrifying. The grounds keeper is a scary dude." His seriousness was gone in a second as his laughs rang through the room.

"I can just see you and Kyle being all badass, fence jumping only turn around to see you were scared by some old man." I only roll my eyes. We had been teased enough by Kellan and Bod the night after, I didn't need anyone else making fun of it.

My hand tightens, gripping his hair in the process as I leaned down to met his air; his breath already coming out in pants.

"Unless you're ready for round two I suggest you cool it with the teasing," I say lowly before returning his head back to my chest while my hand soothes his hair where I pulled it.

"Well what about this one?" A long gash on my inner forearm.

"My dad was drunk at a fight. He pushed me and I couldn't keep my balance. I tripped and scrapped my arm on something in an alley. I still don't know exactly what it's from."

He hummed as he shifted to the side he was just playing with, exposing the tattoo. I knew by the way he was acting, he knew what was under it, and he was going to ask about it.

"Can I ask about this one," he asked hesitantly, his fingers just barely grazing it.

"That's just a tattoo," I say, hoping I could try to play it off. Ryder frowned up at me.

"It's fine if you don't want to talk about it but don't lie to me. We saw it a while ago when you were taking a nap."

It's hard to tell from back here, Carter's voice said but it was weirder than normal. Almost like I could tell he was far away from the front room. Do I need to come up there?

'No. I'm fine.'

"My dad had a few of his friends over one night," I say after a while. "I always tried to stay in my room whenever they were there but just because I never went outside didn't mean they couldn't come it since my door didn't have a lock. They barged in on me drawing," I force myself to take a deep breath as I try to keep the tears at bay.