Insecurities V2.

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Insecurities V2.

Calum: Weight. || I watched Y/N push away yet another meal and to say I was worried was an understatement. She's noticeably eating less, though I can tell that she tries to hide it from me. She's lost a lot of weight too. I loved her how she was before. Don't get me wrong, I still love her now, but she's getting to the stage where she's almost 'too skinny'. I don't know when all of this began or why, but I've been taking careful watch of her eating habits the last few weeks and it's gotten to the point where I'm worrying that she's starving herself. I walked up behind her quietly and wrapped my arms around her waist, causing a squeal to escape her lips. I placed a kiss to the side of her neck and she leaned into my touch. "Come with me." I whispered to her, letting go of her and reaching my hand out for her to take. "Where are we going?" She asked as she took hold of my hand, locking our fingers together. "I just want to show you something." I answered her, pulling her behind me as I led her up to our bathroom. I stopped her in front of me and turned her around to face the full length mirror, her eyes not looking at her reflection for too long. "Look." I told her, staring back at her in the mirror. She seemed slightly anxious, panicky for a moment too. I moved my hands up and slowly pulled her cardigan off her shoulders and placed it on the towel rack beside me. She tried to cover herself up a little by crossing her arms, almost as if she felt exposed. "Why are you hiding from me?" I asked her. "Because I'm disgusting." She whispered in reply. I felt at loss of words for a few seconds, and I struggled to hear her say that to me. "No. No you're not. You're far from that, Y/N." I assured her, looking at her in the mirror. "Your hair is so soft and I love to run my fingers through it." I told her, gathering up her hair in my hands and resting on her left shoulder. "Your eyes are beautiful and your nose and your lips." I told her, placing a delicate kiss to her jaw. "I love your skin, no matter what you think. And I love your figure." I told her, my eyes drifting back up to her reflection. I wrapped my arms securely around her waist and rested my chin on her right shoulder, still looking at her. "I love your stomach and your thighs and your legs. I love everything about you." I told her. She hiccuped a little as a few tears left her eyes and turned herself away from her reflection and wrapped her arms around me, hiding her face against my chest. "But what I don't like is you starving yourself." I spoke in a low tone, rubbing my hand on her lower back to ease her crying. "And I don't want you feeling like you're going through this alone, because you're not." I tilted her chin up and her glossy eyes met mine. I gently raised my hand and tucked some of her hair back behind her ear. "You're so beautiful to me. I want you to see that. I'm gonna help you get better, I love you."

Ashton: Not being good enough. || You quickly wiped under your eyes, removing your mascara which had ran as you heard Ashton pull up outside. Your eyes were red and bloodshot and a little puffy but you were only hoping that he wouldn't notice. You put on your best fake smile you could manage and sat down quietly on the bed, reopening your computer again and logging onto Facebook. Ashton's footsteps echoed throughout the house until they were right outside your door. He smiled at you quickly as he came in, dropping his stuff by the dresser and instantly heading into the wardrobe to get changed. He came out shortly after in his trackies and one of his old T-shirts, smiling at you as he plopped down on the bed next to you. "Hey baby." He mumbled, closing his eyes as he lay on his back, his arm reaching over to you. "Hello Ashy." You cooed in response, finding that your voice was a little shaky. He peaked his eyes open, still in his position and looked over to you suspiciously. You didn't meet his gaze, afraid that he would realise and you began to scroll through your Facebook. "You ok?" He asked you slightly cautious, to which you bit down on your lip and nodded vigorously, mumbling a soft 'mmhm' not trusting your voice again. "Hey." He cooed sensing something was wrong, sitting himself upwards. "What's up?" He asked you as he tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear. It was then that you couldn't help but let a small sob escape your lips, tears quickly falling from your eyes afterwards. "Baby." He sighed, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his side. You leaned against him and his your face, your tears dampening his shirt. "Sweetie talk to me." He spoke softly to you. "I'm not good enough." You stuttered out, hiccuping slightly as your breathing began to pick up. A lump formed in your throat and you worked yourself into a panic, trying your hardest to calm yourself and take in a few deep breaths. "Calm down, baby. You're ok." Ashton tried to soothe you, pulling you away from him a little bit so you could sit up right. You began having a panic attack and you gripped onto Ashton's hands so securely that it was as if he would disappear if you let go of him. He tried whispering you sweet nothing's and consoling you but when he realised that it wasn't helping you much he pulled you onto his lap and placed your head against his heart, knowing this soon your breathing would turn to match I his. "Deep breaths baby girl. In, out." He whispered to you, holding you tightly. Several minutes later, you seemed to have caught your breath, though still hiccuping lightly. He placed one hand to the side of your head, keeping you close to him and the other around your waist. "You're ok." He whispered to you before placing a gentle kiss to your forehead. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asked you in concern, looking down at your distraught figure. You didn't respond, unsure what you wanted to do as your body continued to tremble every now and then. "I'm right here." He promised you. You inhaled a shaky breath and found to courage to speak with your voice slightly quavering. "Sometimes, it all gets a little too much for me." You admitted softly. "What does baby?" He asked you. He shuffled back slightly on the mattress and leaned against the headboard, pulling you back carefully so you were lying down next to him, your arm draped over his stomach. "The hate. Your job. Everything. It all makes me feel like I'm not enough." You laid in silence for a few seconds awaiting his response. "Why didn't you tell me about it?" He questioned you as he began tracing circles on your forearm. "I was worried that you would get annoyed at me or think some of it was true." You felt him tighten his grip on you as the words left your mouth. He brushed your hair from your forehead before leaning down and placing a kiss to it. "I could never think that. You mean so much more to me than you know." He told you. "You're so perfect for me and anything anyone else says doesn't matter. I love you, you are worth so much and I'm right here for you whenever you need me." He promised you. You let out a breath of comfort and cuddled yourself closer to Ash, entwining your legs with his. "Thank you."

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