(A/N) Y'all getting tickets to AJR's OKO tour?
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Ryan: Dead and came back as a cowboy. I call that "reintarnation".
Adam: I'm getting a restraining order.
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(Street Performing)
Jack: I walk a lonely road. In my bag, I have a giant toad. Don't know where it goes, but it's only me and this giant toad.
The guy that requested "Boulevard of Broken Dreams": 👁️👁️
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Jack: *Dials 911*
Jack: Hey, I hate to be "that guy", but I glued myself to the ceiling again.
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Ryan: I am literally going through hell. Do you even care?
Adam: I care about the fact that you've forgotten the meaning of the word "literally".
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Jack: Hey, Adam?
Adam, trying to do schoolwork: Hm?
Jack: Can someone breathe inside the washing machine?
Adam:
Adam: Where's Ryan?
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(Adam talking about his plan to deal with climate change)
Adam: That's the plan! Alright, any questions?
AJR fans: *Raises hand*
Adam: Yes, you raised your hand?
AJR fans: Your hair looks pretty.
Adam:
Adam: Ah, well, that's not a question-
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(Struggling to finish making a song)
Ryan: Well, Rome wasn't built in a day!
Jack, frustrated and pulling out a lighter: No, but it was burned in one.
Ryan: *Snatches the sheet music away from him*
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AJR simps, gazing lovingly at Adam: You know when you see someone and your heart skips a beat?
Adam, concerned: That's called arrhythmia. You can die from that.
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Interviewer: In your opinion, is it possible for someone to hate music and still be a good person?
Ryan: *Smiles*
Ryan: Absolutely the f*ck not.
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Jack: If you're going to talk sh*t about me behind my back, at least invite me.
Jack: I hate that b*tch, too.
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Ryan: *Curled up on the floor and crying uncontrollably*
Jack, trying to comfort him: Don't cry, bro. Your ass is so fat.
Ryan: I know! I'm thicc as f*ck.
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Interviewer: What are you thinking?
Jack: I'm not.
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Jack: Pregnancy is a hoax. The baby sprouts out of the ground. I've seen it happen.
Jack: People pretend to be pregnant for clout! It started with one woman named Eve and people have been chasing the same high ever since.
Jack: It's an outrage. If you're gonna make something up, at least have all genders be able to get pregnant!!
Jack: It doesn't make sense that supposedly Alba can have a baby in her tummy, but why can't I?!
Jack: WHY CAN'T I HAVE A BABY IN MY TUMMY?!!?
Adam: First of all, what? Second of all, the f*ck??
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Adam: It's fine, they'll move on. They'll get over me eventually.
Ryan: None of your exes have ever gotten over you, though.
Adam: You're damn right they didn't.
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Ryan: A pet rock is a fun pet until you realize that's it's essentially immortal and you've cursed it to an eternity of watching its loved ones die.....
Adam: Why? Why do you do this to me?
Jack: Bold of you to assume you'd be considered a loved one by your pet rock.
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Jack, smirking: On the outside, I'm a baddie.
Jack, immediately trying not to cry: But on the inside, I'm a saddie.
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Adam, holding up his bass: It's time to make papa proud.
Jack and Ryan: Yes, sir!
Adam: I could not have more clearly been talking to my bass.
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Critics: I'm not gonna stand and watch you torture people with your music!
Jack: You can sit if you want.
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Adam: If I have to clean one more blood stain from this carpet, I swear I'm going to kill someone.
Ryan: ....... That sounds a little counterproductive, don't you think?....
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AJR: You know who we are.
Literally everyone: No we don't.
AJR: You know what we do.
Everyone: We're still unclear on who you three are.
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Ryan, texting Adam: There's a moth on the outside of the bathroom door, can you get rid of it?
Ryan: Please hurry, I'm going to cry.
Ryan: Adam?
Ryan: ADAM???
Adam, texting back: Adam is dead. You're next. Love, Moth.
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Thanks for liking my story. Bye.
YOU ARE READING
AJR Incorrect Quotes
HumorY'all probably already know what Incorrect Quotes are, so just read the book. This is completely random, but idrc.