Playing With Fire

62

After a long pause she said "I'm not sure..."

"About what? The kids? About 'home'? Us?" he asked hurt.

"About everything." she sighed and added "What if my nightmares keep them up? What if I do something wrong? What if...?"

"There's lots of 'what ifs'." Eric said calm "These are all fears. Face them." She looked at him seeing he was calm and understanding.

"What if I'm there for you? What if they understand? What if we take it slow?" he asked and she nodded.

"I have a proposition to you." he said with a new energy. She looked at him "Lets hear it."

"What if..." he looked at her close "... we go and have lunch together at the Cafeteria? I promise it's not a date." She let out a chuckle and nodded, looking in his eyes.

"Awesome!" he said and looked at his watch "In 10 minutes. We should go." He got up and reached his hand to her. She took it and he pulled her to stand, looking in her eyes, still holding her hand. His stare was reviving all the emotions she had since their kiss on the train. She was ready for a kiss and for a moment it looked like he was about to, but then he started walking, smirking. She followed him down the stairs and through the corridors, him pointing out places for her. They took a moment to hop into the Initiates dorm. He stared her looking at the beds, sliding her hands down to the metal railing when she walked down the steps to go closer. It seemed that she was going through memories. She walked around, went to the bathroom then came back and walked between the beds, carefully looking at each bed. Until she sat on one of them, making Eric surprised. He walked closer seeing her in shock, looking at her hand on the bed, feeling the material under her hand.

"Jamie, are you okay?" he asked worried, crouching in front of her. She nodded, in thoughts.

"This used to be your bed." he said still amazed.

"I know." she said in shock and laid down, feelings washing over her.

"Talk to me, Jamie." he said worried.

"I spent a lot of time here, thinking, licking my wounds." she said sad.

"Hey..." he said and brushed some hair on the side "These were hard times, but you got through these. You were the best!" he said admiring her "Still are." She turned to lay on her back, her arms on both side of her head, looking at him, surrendered, waiting. This was a sign he wasn't gonna ignore. He leaned closer and kissed her, hoping to ease her sadness, to give her reassurance. He pulled away from the kiss with all the willpower he had to look at her. She gave him a little smile and wrapped her arms around him. He let himself limp, resting his head on her chest hearing their breathing.

"We should go." he said eventually. "Reluctantly, she got up, looking around her. This was the place she had cried to sleep, had wondered about Eric, had blushed, had crushed over him, had laughed with her friends.

"Come on." he reached his hand for her "There's more places to see and things to do." reminding him that it's exactly what they should do.

They walked towards the Cafeteria when he remembered that if they'd proceed that route, they'd have to go through Pit. A place that would have way too much negative memories for one day. He took a hold of her hand and pulled her to the side hall.

"Where are you taking me?" she asked unsure.

"It's a shortcut." he said opening a door for her, his eyes on her. They used to make out in there often and he was hoping for the emotions of this place come to her mind just as easy. She looked around "This place seems familiar." making Eric chuckle.

"What?" she asked looking at him over her shoulder. He came close to her and wrapped his arms around her, making her gasp. "It was our make out place." he whispered in her ear and pecked a kiss on her neck. She would have gladly stayed to reminisce but Eric pushed her forward and opened another door to her, smirking, saying close to her "Another time." She felt shivers going down her spine, feeling him walking behind her. They turned around the corner to a more crowded hall. He put his hand on her lower back for a moment.

"You ready?" he asked when they were about toenter the Cafeteria.

She nodded and let herself lead in by his hand on her lower back. As soon as they walked in, people looked at their way and when they realized who it was, people started to cheer and clap, some of them coming to greet them personally. Eric glanced at her, seeing that she didn't have any idea, made him hold his hand up, saying to people "Easy.", "Can we go eat now."

He took two trays, giving one to her and they took some food on their trays.

"Clearly information moves quickly around here." she said chuckling when they were walking towards the leaders table.

"Too quickly." he said rolling his eyes and added "They only know what's necessary." She nodded and felt his hand on her lower back when he lead her up the stairs to their table. She could see he was proud and glad that she was back there with him. And he wasn't the only one. As soon as Four, Tris and the other leaders saw her coming to them, they stood up and gave her a hug, welcoming her there. She felt glad, not overwhelming anymore. They sat down and enjoyed their lunch, talking and joking. He sat close to her, his shoulder against her shoulder blade, his hand behind her back. She could sense his need to be close and in constant contact. She gazed over the crowd, seeing some of them staring at them.

"See this?" he asked quietly, close to her ear. She nodded.

"They are your crowd." he purred "Admiration, honour, respect..." She could see all of that, but she could also see envy and despise in some people faces. He could see it too.

"Don't sweat it." he said and looked at her "Comes with the territory." his stare on her, making her forget about all the people in there. Someone laughing at their table pulled them out of their moment. They turned to listen them talk, him sitting close to her back, sipping some coffee. He saw her having fun with her friends, hoping that in time she could feel herself again.