Monster One-Shots

Fishing for Compliments

    "Of course I'm fishing for compliments. The real question is: why aren't you hooked yet?" she huffed.

    The black, smooth-skinned creature chirped in amusement.

    She’d come into the living room wearing a fancy, revealing dress and a full face of makeup. Even her breasts were elevated and contoured. He was just confused as to why. They’d just gotten back from dinner where she’d only worn a crop top and ripped jeans, and as far as he knew, they didn’t have any more plans for tonight.

    “I don’t understand the occasion,” he said.

    “The occasion is that I look good,” she huffed.

    “Yes, but why did you dress up? Did you make plans?” he asked.

    “No! I just-” she snapped, “I hate you.”

    “Now I am confused as to why you hate me,” he murmured.

    “Because I look nice, and even after my fishing for compliments comment, you didn’t compliment me,” she complained.

    “Would you like me to?” he inquired.

    She pulled out a squishy pad from her breast and threw it at him. He was caught off guard and didn’t react to the sticky silicon smacking him in his face. As it flopped down his pentagon-shaped face and into his lap, he carefully plucked it back up with his scrawny fingers and held it up.

    "Did you throw your boob at me?” he questioned.

    “God, sometimes you’re so infuriating,” she snarled, “I got all dressed up because I just wanted you to call me pretty for once! You never do when I’m just normal, and apparently, I’m not even pretty now.”

    “Even if I don’t say it, I still find you beautiful,” he argued.

    She sighed before lazily stumbling to the couch he sat on and plopping down beside him. “No, you don’t.”

    “Rosemary, I really-” 

    “No,” Rosemary said. “You really don’t. I know I’m your favorite person and you think I’m sexually attractive, but I know you don’t find me pretty.”

    “Rosie…” he trailed off.

    “It’s okay, Atticus. I understand that you’re not human, so you process things differently. Sometimes it gets to me, but I shouldn’t have snapped at you and I’m sorry.” She smiled wryly.

“I’m sorry too, Rosie. I wish I could give you everything you desire. If it is any consolation, I do find you very sexy and arousing. And considering how often others flirt with you, I’m confident that you are very beautiful too.”

That was another thing. She didn’t particularly want him to be a jealous boyfriend, but he didn’t even care if other guys came onto her. Another person could have intercourse with her in front of him, and he wouldn’t even react. She felt replaceable. If he didn't care enough to fight for her, did he ever want her? After all, can you love someone yet be totally fine without them?

She mustered a fake smile. “Thanks.”

“Of course, Rosie.” He purred. “Now…” He held up the piece of silicon. “What is this, and why did it come from your boob?”