Falling Too Far

Chapter 4- "Do not call me angel."

I rested in the mystery person's arms, one of their strong arms supporting my back that was stillquivering with racks of shudders, and the other arm, resting under my knees, picking me up of the ground. I still had not dared to open my eyes, afraid of what I would see, if the monsters were still outside, haunting me. My panic attack had stopped, but I was still overwhelmed with the after effects as I curled up tighter in the person's arms as they carried me through the school.

Tears stained my cheeks. I hated myself. How could I have let that happen, and that in front of so many people? I would be bullied for weeks now, I would be called weak, worthless, and most of all be hated on for talking to Harper Andrews in such a way. A boy that they had know for barely a few hours, driven to his high level of popularity simply for his looks.

I hated society.

The thought of the whole school hating me, having eyes on me everywhere I went, brought fresh tears to spring in my eyes, as I tried desperately to resist. I dug my face into the material of the person's t-shirt, pushing myself closer to them. Him, I thought as I sniffed the cologne on the shirt. As my tears soaked through the shirt onto his skin, I heard a sharp intake of breath rising from his chest into his mouth, before gently exhaling, his breath ruffling the hair on the top of my head.

Oh gods. I must look like a mess.

Still shuddering, I consciously brought a hand up to smooth the hair on the back of my head, stopping it from getting messier than it really was. What about my face? I wondered. Oh no, my make-up will be all over my face. I pressed my face even harder into his chest, trying to hide my face from him, hoping he wouldn't see it.

My first impression has obviously been pretty bad already.

Who was this person? To be so kind to do this for me?

I could hear his heartbeat, expecting it to be calm and steady, but found it racing. I'm sure mine was too. And not just because of the panic attack.

I heard the sudden creaking of a door, and then the person gently settling me on the ground, the cold floor making me wince. I brought my chin to my knees and wrapped my arms around myself, hugging my legs to my body, trying to get used to not having the warm body embracing me. I slowly opened my eyes, finding myself in the janitor's closet, a broom lying on the nearest shelf filled with cleaning liquids. My eyes finally caught on the feet of someone standing up in front of me. The jeans on the persons legs were dark, and he was wearing plain Converse shoes.

Converse.

I felt a deep sinking in my stomach, my heart falling. My body tensed suddenly, and I knew he sensed it, his feet shifted uncomfortably. My every muscle was screaming as I slowly scanned the body from his Converse shoes, to his dark jeans, to his dark grey Fall Out Boy t-shirt. I took a sharp intake of breath when I saw his face.

Harper freaking Andrews.

I froze. I expected him to be looking down at me in horror, disgust, even. But I only saw concern, concern for me. I stared at him blankly, panic rising in me. 

He was the one who helped me? But he started it all!

I saw his eyes scanning my face, trying to pull my secrets out of me, delving into every nook and cranny, trying to find my secret.

"Angel, are you- " he asked, bending down beside me. My heart fluttered at how close we were.

I cut him off by raising my hand. "No." I said quietly.

"What?" he replied, confused. "No." I repeated, more firmly. He fell quiet.

"No. I will not let you do this. I will not let you push me into another panic attack, and I will not forgive you for doing so. You can't build me up after breaking me down, I will not allow it. I will not." I said looking him straight in the eyes which such an intensity, I felt him squirm under my gaze.

"Angel, I'm sorry, I'm sorry for doing that to you. You should hate me- "

"Please, Andrews. I do hate you." I saw hurt flash across his eyes, so quickly, I wouldn't have noticed if he weren't kneeling down beside me. His eyes widened when he was hurt, I observed, allowing me to see more of his green eyes.

"Look, I'm sorry Angel. I messed up. I just- "

"Wanted to keep your reputation?" I interrupted, spite rushing through my words. "Wanted to stay popular? Wanted to make sure you still had all the girls? By bullying me, cracking me in half so now the whole school hates me? So I can get bullied more? After all, Andrews, shattering one broken girl is okay if you can keep your reputation. How about all those other girls? The ones you toy with and keep for a day, leaving them the next, crushing their hearts? What about them? Not worth stopping if it means you can keep your popularity?" I said, sarcasm thick in my voice. I didn't know what was making me so angry and so courageous to talk to him like that. It was just the way that he treated people that seemed so wrong. "Well guess what Andrews? One day, one girl will show up, and you will fall for her like all those other girls fell for you. And do you know what she's going to do? She will tear your heart out and stomp on it, crushing you, breaking you in half. And believe me, I can't wait for that day." I leaned closer to him, our faces merely inches apart. The only difference was that this time, I felt nothing, nothing but the rage that bursting out of me. "You make me sick." I spat, pushing him away and standing up.

I looked at him in disdain. I could see pain, hurt and surprise flashing in his eyes, tendrils of his hair falling onto his eyelids. He made no move to flick them away, still kneeling on the floor before straightening up, his stiff movements still reflecting shock. I bet no one has ever spoken to him like that.

"Angel, please, wait, I can explai- " he called out desperately, pain shimmering in his eyes, his voice tight and strained.

"Do not call me angel," I hissed, pulling the door open and slamming it behind me.

Hi guys! This chapter is probably really badly written, and I'm so sorry about that... thank you for being so supportive!

I have a question... do any of you actually enjoy my story?

Comment what you think about this chapter, please! :)

-A :)

UPDATE: WHYYY DID I DO THIS EW CRINGE