You *Kellic*

[23] Kellin speaks up

This morning when I walked into first period late, I saw Vic sitting inbetween Hayley and Taylor just like he did on the first day of school. Miss.Blue doesnt even comment on me being late. I took the last open seat next to Jack and Oliver.. I gave Oliver the death glare before zoning out and then regreating it once I hear the words 'test tomorrow'..after class Oliver grabed me by my arm which had me slappping him for touching me, he didnt react at all he just apoligized said it needed to be done and asked if things could go back to the day before my plan started, I said no but the he said he'd do whatever I wanted him to do, so of course I said yes and now its lunch and one of those things hes going to help me with starts now, hes going to get everyone to pay attention to me, its easy for me but I dont want to yell in this situation. I make sure Vic, Mike, Tony and Jaime are at their table before tapping Oliver's shoulder to say it was time..

I take a deep breath before getting up, teachers hate me enough for leaving chip bags on the floor I'm pretty sure I wont get in too much shit for this, I stand up on the table and Oliver yells at everyone to calm down and before I know it everyones eyes are on me.

"I have to admit somthing" I say loudly and everyone goes dead silent

"You see, I'm not one to regret things, obviously I'm Kellin Quinn, but all you pesants know that" I roll my eyes and I hear some people sigh "Shut up" I say sternly then I realize I might be acting like a dick

"Sorry, anyways, I recently hurt someone, I hurt this person emotionaly, I wasnt prepared for this, I didnt realize, that all this person's life, well I mean as long as this person has known me, all they wanted, all he wanted was to get to know me, and well I didnt even give him that, I gave him friendship that he wanted but, I used him, and I made him feel really bad and I have to admit, I fucked up. I really fucked up, he even told me, 'people said you were a dick and used people but I never believed that,It was obvious you didn't like everyone so I wasn't surprised that you had so called, Victims, but then I became one of your own, I was and am another one of your victims' and the pain on his face is somthing I cant take out of my mind. They way.....The way he looked at me....He told me he thought I was different and now that I think about it, I wish I was different, but I cant change.. I guess I'll do this...I'll try not to hurt people as much as I do... I'll try being nicer, but obviously I'll still be high on my chair, or well this table..Until I have to sit back down because in about five minutes I bet I'll get in trouble so I might as well hurry up this speech, If I've caused you any harm I'm really sorry, and to the person I hurt, I really do want to get to know you and maybe you'll get to know me, maybe I'll be like I was in your thoughts? No big promisses, I know now how much of a dick I can be and I'm sorry.It's funny how much you realize things after damage is done, the way you cared for me I've never been cared by anyone, and I'm actually starting to miss that comfort and maybe in the end I actually need you,wether I'm in love with you or not,you are ignoring me and trust me I would ignore me too" I say looking at Vic for the last part. I hop of the table and everyone is left there in shock.

"Did Kellin Quinn just apoligize to someone?" I hear a voice ask

"Did Kellin Quinn just apoligize to Vic?" Someone close to me asks and I just look around, people are looking at me in shock, some people look sorry for me. I just sit back down at my table, after ten minutes of just sitting there I couldn't stay,everyones eyes are on me and I cant take this, I love attention but not when it wont go away, I dont want everyone looking at me while I try talking to someone. I grab my bag and rush down the hall. I pass the class rooms, I pass the teenagers making out in the hallway, I pass the teachers who are bound to yell at me about 'running' but at this point I hear nothing, all I hear is the Vic yelling at me to leave his house, all I see is faint images of Vic sitting in the pouring rain. I rush out of the school and down the streets, I picture Vic standing next to me and removing his hands from my eyes to reveal what was his place to go when he needed to just go and sit out from the world, I hear him saying 'This can be our spot'

I get down on my knees as I look around at the empty field a head of me, I dont deserve to even sit near a tree like Vic would, like he did on Saturday when I found him in the pouring rain. I lay down on the grass and close my eyes.

--

"and here we are again" I open my eyes to see Vic sitting next to me, "did you come to think?" He adds and I nod

"What about you? What are you thinking?" I ask

"I was just thinking about this dick who pretended to love me, and how he stood on a table just to apologize,I really wanted him to fall down. After he left that room everyone was like, 'shit Vic, you got him to apologize', they acted like I was some kind of god. I dont feel like a god, I feel played, But yet, the sad part is, I actually want to give this dick another chance because, I cant get over him. On Saturday, I couldnt stop thinking of how much I missed how that guy smiles and the stupid grin he gets on his face and I have to admit his name used to make me smile then it made me mad and now his name just gives me mixed emotions" He says slowly and then he looks over at me as I sit up so I'm not laying down.

"Hey I'm Vic, I've always wanted to talk to you but I've never had a chance" He says putting his hand out, I put my hand out and shake it.

"Hi I'm Kellin, we should hang out sometime"

"Too fast Quinn, too fast" Vic says as he shakes his head

"I just said we should hang out!" I state

"one step at a time, I'm still not fully okay with you and what happened"

"I understand" I say softly as I look down at the grass

"I know apologizing isnt your thing" Vic says softly

"it really isnt...You know I cant change, but I can try for you" I say and I can see a small blush go onto his face, and for once I think I feel my face heat up and like my stomach is in knots.

"You're such a romantic dick, Kellin, you know that?"

"Eh I hear that sometimes"

"I hate you Kellin, I really do" Vic says "But I just,dont think I cant stay mad at you forever" he adds and I look back up to face him.

"I'm sorry about everything, I know how much you must really hate me"

"I'm sorry I left your jacket in the rain" Vic says and I watch as Vic looks behind us confused. During lunch Jack told me Vic's guitar was ready and at my house, how could I forget.

"I know you want to start completely over and friends don't just like take friends to their house like this but, I need you to come with me" I say really fast as I get up.

"Kellin, you arent taking me into your house right now"

"But I have a surprise for you"

"we just became friends like five minutes ago, you've crossed the line" Vic says as he puts his hands up defensivly and I take that as my chance, I grab his arm pulling him up and I put my arm around him making him follow me to my house.

"Kellin let me go"

"Make me"

When we get to my house, I open the door and push Vic inside.

"well so whats my surprise?" Vic asks confused as he straightens out his shirt

"Its in the kitchen"

"It better not be a cake, I feel like you will lie saying its vanilla cake when really it has cyanide in it and I'd die instantly"

"Stop being dramatic" I say as I walk to the kitchen with him following behind me

"You didnt, why would you?" He says in shock as he picks up his guitar

"I feel like it was my fault it was broken in the first place" I shrug

"I still hate you" He says sternly "But I really could use a hug right now" He adds as he puts the guitar down and I put my arms around him.

"when will you not hate me?" I ask

"when I know this friendship is real and not something to make Justin happy"

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A/N: I could, have one final chapter then a epoligue...OR I can just continue writing...basically, are you sick of this story yet? Or do you want me to continue :)