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Being a L

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Being a L.A. with Tom has been so fun. Getting to act like a couple without having to worry about my daughter coming in for some reason. I also got to actually feel young. I've been around Everleigh everyday for the past 3 and a half years and had to be her mom, but now I can be just a 21 year old thinking of my daughter in the back of my mind because I am across the country from her.

Obviously with being in L.A. and my boyfriend being an actor in a marvel, comes with paparazzi. Pictures from us arriving in the airport holding hands have circulated. Other pictures of us walking around the city have been all over social media. People figuring out i'm the girl he was spotted with a couple months ago with my daughter and now people are trying to figure out if we're dating or trying to get us to say we are.

It's out last day here before I fly back to New Hampshire and Tom goes to Europe for the rest of the press tour before coming back to the U.S. We are in our hotel room laying in bed. Tom's scrolling through instagram and twitter. All of his tags are pictures of us.

"Lilah?" He says looking over at me.

"Yeah?" I ask and I turn to face him.

"How do you feel about going public with our relationship? We don't have too, i'm just wondering."

"I mean, i'm okay with it. Just... I don't want pictures of Everleigh going around without me, you or family and close friends have posted."

"Well hopefully no one will find out where you live so that shouldn't be a worry for when you're home."

"She's three. I don't want her face all over the internet. People somehow already found my instagram. Thankfully it's private."

"I can post a picture on instagram say we're dating and talking about how you have a daughter and you don't want pictures of her going around that have been taken without your consent."

I sigh. "Won't the paparazzi still take pictures?"

Tom grabs my hands. "Sadly yes. But only when you're around me in public in a big city. When we're on New Hampshire we should be fine. Maybe fans or something taking pictures but most of them are pretty respectful."

"Most of them. Not all."

Tom grabs my face with his hands gently. "We don't have to say anything if you don't want to. It's up to you. If you're too worried about Everleigh's safety and everything we don't say anything. It's okay."

"I want to be able to hold your hand in public though."

"Me too love. Tell me to say something and i'll make a post. Tell me not too and I won't. Either way i'm okay with."

"Can I think about it?"

"Of course."

Tom smiles and kisses my forehead. I cuddle into his side. His arms going around my shoulders. His chin on the top of my head. We stay like that till he gets a text saying he has a whole meeting to get to before p he flys back to London for a couple weeks. He tells me that and goes to get dress. Kisses me goodbye and walks out of our hotel room. I decide it's a good idea to call my parents and Everleigh. My mom picks up the phone pretty quick with a big smile.

"Hi sweetie! How are things?" She beams at me.

"Good, good. Tom has to run to a meeting really quick but everything is good." I tell her playing with the edge of the blanket.

"Okay, Do you want to talk to Everleigh?"

"Yeah. I miss her."

"She misses you too." My mom sets up the phone so I can see Everleigh while she's eating.

"Hi baby girl!" I say with the biggest smile on my face.

"Hi mommy!" Everleigh smiles back. "When you come home? I miss you."

"I miss you too sweetie. I'll be home tomorrow but you might be asleep. But i'll give you kisses while you sleep and you can cuddle me all morning. Okay?"

"Okay mommy. Is Tommy coming too?"

"Only for a couple days. He has to go back home to see his mom and dad."

"Can we go with him?"

"No honey we can't. I'm sorry. But I promise soon we can."

"Okay mommy."

"I love you sweetie. Can you give the phone back too grandma? I need too talk too her."

"Okay. Love you mommy."

"Love you too sweetie."

"Grandma!" Everleigh shouts and she comes over. "Mommy wants to talk to you."

"Thank you sweetie." My mom says taking her phone back and going to the living room. "What's up honey?"

"Tom wants to go public with our relationship." I tell her. "I do too, but I don't want people taking pictures of Everleigh without my consent."

"Honey, Tom's a celebrity. You knew that when you got into the relationship with him. Eventually you'll have to go public. You can be public to the world but still have your relationship private. You can keep your social media private and that will help keeping Everleigh safe. Tom doesn't have too. If you want him too he can. But you're her mom it's up to you."

"I just want Ev safe. That's all I want."

"I know he does too. He loves Everleigh, probably like his own kid. He will do anything for the two of you."

"Thanks mom. I needed that."

"Of course sweetie. Now, i'll see you tomorrow night. Spend time with Tom before there's a kid again in your life. Just don't make another one."

"Mom!"

"I love you honey."

"Love you too. Bye."

We hang up and put my phone down and hop into the shower. Washing my hair, face and body and hoping out and going to grab clothes. Meaning just a pair of leggings and one of Tom's sweatshirt. I grab a hair tie once i'm done getting dresses and throw my hair up in a messy bun. I then sit on the bed waiting for Tom to get back.

He gets back and looks extremely tired. He takes off his jackets and shoes and lays down onto the bed. I move and lean over him.

"Is everything alright?" I ask.

He sighs. "Yeah. Just don't think i'll see you until the premiere. If you want to go with me." He sits up next to me.

"Of course i'll go. I have been think though. I'm okay with going public. Just want to make sure people know it's not okay to take pictures of Everleigh without my consent or post pictures of Everleigh that I didn't take."

"Of course. Everleigh's safety is the number one thing. And your too."

"I know that. So you can make whatever social media post you want and Ev can be in it to explain what I want and my social media will stay private."

"If that's what you want."

"It is." I smile at Tom and hug him. "Thank you for being you."

"is that a good thing?"

"I said thank you didn't I?"

"True."

Tom hugs me just as tight. Soon he pulls out his phone and picks the picture that happens to be his lockscreen as well of me him and Ev. We are all smiling and Ev is in between the two of us.

In the post he says we are dating and that I do have a 3 year old daughter and how we both want to keep her safe and don't want pictures being taken with out our consent and picture being posted that aren't from us.

All the comments are good things. Some saying i'm just using Tom for his money to take care of my child but obviously that isn't true. We both turn our phones off for the rest of the day and just spend time with each other and the next couple days following because we won't see each other till the premiere.

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