Revelations an adaption of Pride and Prejudice

Chapter 13

Asthey drive away from London towards Derbyshire, usually a three daytrip, but Fitzwilliam has proposed to take four days to really enjoytheir time together, Elizabeth finds herself a bit downhearted. Shewill never go back home, except as a guest, and every league theytravel now takes her further away from her father and from Jane. Fora moment her throat feels as if it is too narrow, and her eyes sting,but she is not going to break down crying for her old life.

Shehas married a man who loves her for her strength of mind, not for herdependent nature, it may upset his image of her to see her cry.During their engagement she felt so connected to him, but seeing histown-house and meeting his family and connections she has started torealise how much their circumstances differ, and how little theyactually know one another.

Itwas easy to be madly in love with her handsome husband while livingwith her parents, in the house she grew up in, everything around herfamiliar, her future secured from want and having to live amongpeople with inferior minds.

Butnow she feels totally at the mercy of the man she married, they aredriving in his carriage, from his exquisite London home to hismagnificent estate, Elizabeth of course knows the road, she hastravelled it with her aunt and uncle after all and they checked theirprogress regularly with the help of a detailed road map. ButFitzwilliam arranged everything, he consulted her, but he did everypractical thing himself, arranging the marriage, having theinvitations sent, deciding what dinner was to be served, the innswhere they will stay during the trip.

Willshe ever be allowed to make a decision of her own?

Despitespending months thinking of the role she wanted Fitzwilliam to havein her life, having seen his estate, having gained quite a realisticinsight in his character, finally deciding she did love him andwanted him part of her life, she really doesn't have a clue how hepictures her as his wife. Will he expect her to spend her daysdressed up as a pretty ornament for his sitting-room? Will she haveto visit poor families? Will he be out hunting all day, leaving herbehind with his sister and a piece of needle-work? What will her lifebe like?

EvenElizabeth's strong, positive character has some difficulty with somuch insecurity, and she suddenly remembers Charlotte's opinion, thatone might as well get married without knowing the other party toowell, since happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance.That is not a comfortable thought at all, and she opposes it bythinking of last night, didn't she see a totally differentFitzwilliam then, who let her explore his body at her leisure, nottaking control at all? And isn't he madly in love with her, just lookat the adoring expression with which he watches her even now. Hedoesn't want to rule her, or he wouldn't have insisted on her notpromising to obey him.

Darcyhas been watching Elizabeth for some time, feasting his eyes on hisbeloved, and much of her feeling can be read from her face. She isnot as deliriously happy as he is, she seems close to tears even,until she forcibly represses that, but her thoughts are clearly notvery cheerful. Whatever can be the matter? She's exchanginginsecurity for wealth, a tiny room in a country house for an entireestate, and her noisy family for a doting husband.

Hiswealth. His estate. And she loves her family.

Adeep, sedate voice breaks the silence and says gently: 'You miss themalready, don't you? Your family, your little room, your favouritewalks?'

Andsure enough, her expressive face shows her anxiety clearly now, andhe gathers her to himself, sets her light shape on his lap, rests herhead against his chest. 'Better let it out love, you'll feel muchbetter after a good cry. There you go, I'm here with you, I love youso much, if you're sad I want to share it with you.'