"I'm not ready." I said with wide eyes, looking at Colby. "Yes, you are. I promise you can do this." Colby encouraged as Dr. Moore came in.
"Okay, Briana. The moment we've waited for. Are you ready to do this?" She asked with a warm smile.
"I don't think I really have a choice." I said and took Colby's hand, squeezing it for dear life.
"Nope, unfortunately not." She said as the nurse and the midwife set me up in my stirrups.
"We're gonna try and do this nice and quick. However, if you need a break you just tell us okay?" She asked as I nodded.
"Okay." I said shakily. "I'll be right here, darling. I'm not going anywhere." Colby hummed as I teared up.
"Okay, Briana. We're gonna start nice and slow, give me a big push." Dr. Moore said as I gritted my teeth and pushed as hard as I could.
"Good! Wow. Good." The doctor said before I collapsed into the bed shakily.
"Take a breather for me, then we'll do another big push just like that one." She instructed as Colby kissed my head, gently caressed my hand.
I took a deep breath then pushed again, the pain hitting me like a truck.
"Oh fuck!!" I screamed, collapsing onto the bed. I tried to move my legs so they could close, but the nurse and midwife were holding them securely.
"Let me go!!! God damnit!" I cried out as Colby gasped, taking my face with one hand and pulling my face to look at him.
"I'm right here, baby. Look at me." He said as I started to panic. "You're okay." He reminded, looking into my eyes.
"It hurts so bad." I cried out, hoping he could help me. "I know, sweetheart. Only for a little while longer." He said gently.
"Okay, Bri. I need you to trust me. We're gonna get through this together." Dr. Moore said as I nodded.
"Okay." I whispered then closed my eyes. "Big push." She said as I gritted my teeth and pushed until there was an extreme amount of burning.
"No!! Oh fuck! Something's wrong!" I cried out in a panic. "What are you feeling?" Amanda asked as I whimpered in pain. "Burning. Fuck it's burning!" I cried out.
"We call that the ring of fire. That means you're close to crowning." She explained as I started to hyperventilate from the pain.
"Hey." Colby said gently. "You're so strong, you can do this." He said as I clenched my jaw. "Fuck you!" I yelled angrily.
It was easy to say that I was strong and could do this when you didn't feel what I was feeling.
I didn't know if I could actually do this.
"Give me one more big push." Dr. Moore said as I shook my head. "I can't! Fuck I can't!" I cried out, wiggling my legs.
"Don't give up on me now. You are so close to meeting your daughter." She encouraged. I nodded then gritted my teeth before pushing as hard as I could.
Doing this caused the burning to intensify by a million.
"Oh god!!! No no no!" I cried then grabbed Colby's shirt, pulling him closer.
"I want to cut your fucking dick off." I growled lowly causing him to breathe a laugh. "Don't fucking laugh you fucking idiot!!" I screamed as his face fell.
"Sorry. I didn't mean to laugh. You're doing amazing, my love. So fucking good. Put that energy of anger and put it into your next push." He said and brushed my hair from my sweating forehead.
