Whatever It Takes

Chapter 97

So give me something to believe, cause I am living just to breathe.
And I need something more, to keep on breathing for.. so give me something to believe.
--The Bravery





It had been a long stressful day from the start to the finish for Derek Shepherd. He hadn't seen so much as a glimpse of his wife all day since they arrived at work, but didn't expect to and was doing his hardest to try and heed the advice of his councilor.

He was still smoldering a little from the argument they'd had that morning and stepped on the elevator, briefcase in tow just wanting to get back to his hotel room and try to attempt sleep.

He sighed trying to get Meredith off his mind and the disappointment in how things were going. He knew that he was supposed to give her space but he also knew that she needed to open up, to give him something to go on.. Right now he felt utterly helpless.. He didn't know if he could go on with things like this.

The elevator stopped one floor down and the doors open. Their eyes clashed instantly and he felt a jump in his chest and excitement in his nerves.. she looked caught off guard and surprised and started to turn around avoiding the elevator.. he sighed defeated, realizing his hopes starting to fade.

She stopped herself and turned around quickly sliding through the doors of the elevator feeling childish for stalling but looked over at his beaten down look.

"You going back to your hotel?" she asked after a brief uncomfortable silence.

"Yeah." He mumbled out as he leaned away from her against the wall of the elevator and closed his eyes as he brought his hand up starting to rub his tired features.. "You going home?"

"Not yet." She replied shortly.. almost forced..

"Oh."

"Yeah." She nodded trying to make an effort "There's a case coming in."

"That's nice." He replied feeling drained...

Feeling the conversation forced as they stood once again in silence.. he let out a sigh and felt her tiny hand cup around his and squeeze it three times... he held his breath a moment and then slowly looked down at their hands woven together, noticing also the platinum and diamond rings on her finger as well, he lifted his eyes to meet her soft sincere ones... he swallowed down the knot in his throat and felt his heart leap in his chest as he softly cracked a smile and whispered out..

"I love you too."

She smiled back at him hoping that her gesture would be enough for now, and it was.. the elevator doors opened to the bottom floor and they both stepped off still holding hands.. they kept each other's gaze as they slowly walked out into the hallway knowing that they needed to break away due to having to go down different paths...

She stopped first, him as well.. she then leaned into him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders and held him closely.. he felt a wash of relief as his arms found their place around her waist and he rested his cheek against her head and closed his eyes as he breathed her in...

She felt a warmth in her chest for the first time in weeks and a flutter in her stomach as she felt her body against his and for the first time in a long time almost felt a sense of safety... she felt tears burn her eyes as she finally pulled away from him and gave him a soft smile.

"Have a good night Derek." She said softly..

"Good night Meredith." He smiled, wishing that they would be going home together and wanting to take her in his arms forever but knowing that at least this was a step... and in the right direction. He turned starting to walk off reluctantly when he saw a nurse rush up..

"Dr. Grey, your patient is here, in trauma room 2, they need you there STAT." she said..

"Ok." She said taking the chart, "And its Dr. Shepherd."

Derek felt the hair stand up on his arms as he turned to look at her, in disbelief.. needing more clarity.

"What?" the nurse asked confused..

"My name... its not Dr. Grey anymore." Meredith replied shutting the chart "Its Dr. Shepherd."

The nurse gave her a confused shrug and hurried off towards the ER.. Meredith turned and gave Derek a wink and half a smile as she rushed off behind the nurse..

Derek stood there watching her feeling the weight on his shoulders lift and smiled as he breathed a little easier, knowing that she was trying.. and that she did love him.