29

43 2 3
                                    

Arizona Robbins sat down hard into her office chair after watching her girlfriend and ex-girlfriend excitedly head down the hallway. Although Callie was off for the weekend, she happily came in for a few hours so Kate could show her an idea she had.

Callie had created successful artificial cartilage from scratch and currently her and Kate were looking into 3D printing. Kate had an idea for a hip transplant she was scheduled to do next week. The orthopedic surgeons were off to the lab to annoy the bioengineers.

Taking a long drink from her water bottle, Arizona took a deep breath and relaxed. She still had a bit of a lingering headache from last night. Herself, Kate, Callie, Jada, and Jada's friends had gone out to the bar last night. It wasn't a late night for Arizona's standards but everyone else had at least gotten a little tipsy before they left.

Overall, Arizona enjoyed going out with her girlfriend and friends last night. She had met Rachel, Becca, and Lexi before, but they were just something last night. The three of them had the whole group laughing the entire night.

It would be coming up on year since Callie indirectly broke her heart. As Arizona sat at her desk, she realized that it wasn't even fair to think that it was Callie who broke her heart. She had broken her own heart in so many ways. And in a few months, would be Callie and Jada's first anniversary as a married couple, and the painful reminder of everything Arizona let walk away from her.

Arizona was stuck. She loved being around Callie even if they were only friends. She just needed to be around Callie. But on the other hand, being around Callie meant watching Callie with another woman. And as much as she didn't want to feel this way, Arizona Robbins was jealous.

Turning her chair, Arizona kicked her good leg up onto the chair in front of the opposite wall. She then picked up the prosthetic and placed it beside her other foot.

Having her leg amputated was something Arizona wished she could have in a do over. It wasn't even the losing her leg part she wanted to change, she could live with an amputated leg, but how she treated her fiancée at the time. Callie Torres was absolutely wonderful to her. She didn't know going into the surgery that Arizona had an infection. Arizona knew that. But she still allowed herself to take her anger out on Callie when Callie went through with the amputation to save her life.

She had spent the months following until Callie decided to end their relationship that one day during counseling, berating Callie, taking all of her anger out on Callie. Arizona was a horrible fiancée and something inside her decided to try sleeping with another woman.

And then Callie found out.

Callie had been nothing but loving, loyal, supportive, and caring throughout the entirety of their relationship until Arizona slept with someone else. Arizona would often cry when she replayed the entire thing in her head again. The power was out and Callie had come to find her. When the lights came back on, Callie noticed Arizona's engagement ring pinned to the other woman's scrubs.

She would never be able to shake the look on Callie's face when she found out. Sitting at her desk by herself, Arizona began to cry.

And Callie had never looked at her the same again.

When Arizona looked into Callie's eyes, they would be full of want, lust, adoration, and love. And after that night, she never saw the same thing in Callie's eyes again until there was another woman standing in her place.

Arizona had nothing against Callie's wife. In fact, Arizona was glad Jada had come into Callie's life. Because the woman taking her place was worthy of doing so. Jada had done what Arizona didn't, she let Callie in and let Callie be at her side and help her through the rough times. She loved Callie wholeheartedly and it was obvious to onlookers how in love she was with Callie.

But as much as she didn't want to be, Arizona Robbins was jealous.

She couldn't be mad at anyone but herself. Because she put the strain on her and Callie's relationship, she treated Callie absolutely horribly, and she had been the one to absolutely devastate Callie.

Arizona was surprised Jada was even interested in being friends with her. At the beginning, Arizona had been a little hostile with Jada and she had been unintentionally taking her anger at herself on Jada. And then Jada had told her off that one day. As much as she didn't like being showed up by Callie's new girlfriend, Arizona was thankful that the woman Callie was with defended and protected her like that.

On top of that, Arizona mentally kicked herself for all the times she had turned Callie down. Because Callie was where she wanted to be now, with a woman who shared her want, and it wasn't Arizona at Callie's side.

She had turned down Callie at the very beginning after kissing her in the bathroom of that one bar. Callie had told Arizona that she was bisexual and Arizona wanted nothing to do with that. Callie had then played hard to get when she made Arizona realize that she was missing out.

Arizona had turned Callie down over kids. She had been adamant about not wanting children. Callie had wanted kids and didn't hold back from letting Arizona know that it was something she wanted in her future. Callie had a beautiful baby girl with her wife.

Callie had gotten turned down once again after Arizona decided to move to Africa. She had put Callie in a tough situation. Callie was faced with staying in Los Angeles by herself or going to Africa with her girlfriend for three years and leaving behind all of her research. It was an amazing career opportunity for Arizona but Arizona was also an incredible surgeon who didn't need that to back up her skills. So Arizona had chosen her work and dumped Callie at the airport.

And then again, Callie had let Arizona back into her life after she returned from Africa early. They had gotten engaged, made it through the car accident, were thinking about having a child. Then the plane crash happened and Arizona wasn't the same Arizona before. She had changed and she had taken out all of her anger and frustration out on Callie. Callie had lost Mark not long before Arizona's plane crash and she wasn't going to let Arizona die.

As much as she didn't want to think this way or feel this way, Arizona was still madly in love with Callie. She resented even thinking this way when Callie and Jada were going through a little bit of a rough time after New Year's, but Arizona hoped they would divorce. She wanted to try and shoot her shot with Callie again. Arizona went in hopeful, but knew the intimacy she shared with Callie was Callie releasing her frustration. And she was okay with that because she got to sleep with Callie and kiss Callie at least one last time.

Kate was an amazing girlfriend and Arizona loved her. No matter how hard she tried, Arizona couldn't love Kate the way she loved Callie.

And it broke her. She was the reason her and Callie had split. She blew the many chances Callie had given her. Jada had given Callie the love she deserved and had been the partner she deserved. She had given Callie what Arizona didn't want to, a beautiful baby girl.

Arizona took a deep breath and attempted to focus her thoughts back on her work and not the unavailable woman she desired.

Lynx Book 2: A Callie Torres StoryWhere stories live. Discover now