After we left joburg we came straight to Ladysmith and sims came with us too. I was scared that I wasn't going to be accepted but the whole family was excited because my father had told them about me and that I was alive and not dead as they thought. They took me to my mother's grave and it was a better sweet moment being there and I didn't cry as much as thought I was going to because I was thinking about the baby and when I was there listening to my dad and brother tell her about me I felt a sense of belonging and peace. I saw her pictures and yes I looked like her, I have her eyes and smile.
I have an aunt and two uncles, one of the uncles is the one who took over the business after dad and the other one lives in Johanessburg handling the business there. I have 4 male cousins and 2 female cousins who have 2 kids each and married. I have a good relationship with all of them but i'm most close to my aunt another than my dad and brother and she has no kids and she treats me like her own daughter. She's the last born in the family even though she's 40, never married and dad is very protective over her and I call her ma not aunty.
There was a welcoming ceremony for me and the whole Ngcobo family was there including their business assocciates and it was beautiful and I told mbuso about the ceremony and he was happy but wouldn't come because he didn't want to disrespect my father and the whole family while he is still have to pay the damages for me getting pregnant. I was scared to tell dad I was pregnant but he told me he suspected that I was and he was happy and told the rest of the family and I have literally been treated like a baby of the family and I'm loving every moment. My brother well, he had mixed feelings about it and I didn't blame him.
I talk to mbuso everyday and he would send me R20000 every month for my needs and for whatever the baby would want as I'm pregnant. I told him it wasn't necessary because my dad and brother make sure I have evrything I need. Sims left after the welcoming ceremony and I miss her, I told thami a week after I have left what happend he was shocked and broke down and I haven't gotten hold of him since that day and so I decided to give him some space to process everything. My father invited uncle victor but he didn't show up because he still feels I hate him and won't forgive him but I feel like I have forgiven him even though I haven't said it to him but I know I will, I just need to have courage. Yes he did hurt me but he made sure I was always taken care of and honestly if my father can forgive and make peace with him, I can too.
My brother lives in Durban and works there but he has been coming home every weekend since I have been here and we are bonding everytime. Today is thursday and it's my first appointmen with the doctor and mbuso is coming with me to see the doctor. I'm going to be seeing my baby for the first time and I'm excited. I'm almost four months pregnant and starting to show and I haven't seen mbuso since I left. I wake up, make my bed even though we have aunties who help in the house but i like doing things for myself. I do my morning routine and go to the kitchen and find my handsome dad drinking tea and reading a newspaper..." Isolezwe ".
Me:" sawubona baba " (morning daddy ) I hug him on his shoulders and kiss his cheek and he smiles.
Baba:" I'm never going to get enough of hearing those words, morning baby did you sleep well? "
Me:" I did dad. what are we having for breakfast? "
Him:" ask your aunt?, you woke up early today where are you going? "
Me:" baba I told you on sunday that it's my first doctors appointment today, don't you remember ? " my aunt comes to the kitchen singing
Her:" Morning baby "
Me: morning ma. what are we having? "
Dad:" I'm coming with you " I look at mah asking for her help with dad
Mah:" Zakes you know you cant' go, she's going with her babby daddy "
Me:" baby daddy mah? " I say embarrased and dad has stopped reading the newspaper looking at me unimpressed
Her:" Well what do I call him because he's not your boyfriend " she says laughing. She knows the whole story between me and mbuso
Dad:" what exactly is this boy's intentions with you? "
Me:" I don't know dad. We made a decision to break up and so we can both focus on ourselves "
Him:" My daughter will not raise a child alone. He must fix himself, man up and take care of his family "
Mah:" or else we will raise this child and he will not see her or him " i give her aren't you suppose to be on my side look
Me:" Ngiyezwa baba " ( yes dad )
Mah:" Oh I can't wait i'm so excited, I hope it's a girl "
Dad:" me too. I can't wait to spoil her and do all the things I never got the chance to do for you " he says sadly
Me:" I'm here now dad and we have a second chance and I'll always be your little girl " I take his hand
Dad:" that's why I am taking my baby girl to her doctor's appointment and I'm going to see my first grandbaby since your brother won't settle down and get married " mah laughs, I give up . At that exact moment big brother walks to the kitchen looking like he didn't sleep.
Him:" morning family " we greet back, he kisses me and mah on our cheeks and he reakes of alcohol and brushes our dad's head and dad slaps his hand off and we laugh
Dad:" don't touch me with those hands because I don't know where they were and inside of what yesterday " my brother chokes on his water and I flush same time....my dad guys.
Mah:" bhuti?, we have a child here! "
Dad:" She's not a child and she's pregnant and she knows what i'm talking about " but I thought he was happy that I am
Sicelo:" I was only drinking dad, i didn't...."
Mah:" Oh please spare us, we don't want to hear about your sex life "
Me:" mah I'm hungry "
Her:" what would you like to have? "
Me:" can you make me your famous soft porrige, I love it "
Mah:" ok baby "
Sicelo:" you mean the baby likes it "
Me:" when did you get here? "
Him:" late last night, didn't want to wake you up "
Me:" ncoooh you missed me " i say pinching his cheek
Him:" you wish. I came because I want to see my nephew or niece " he says touching my stomach
Mah:" Well since everyone is going, I might aswell go too " I sit there quiet because I can't believe I'm finally receiving the love I have always longed for and sometimes it feels like I'll wake up and all of this would be gone and taken away from me again.
Mah:" baby you okay ? " she asks me
Me:" I'm okay mah "
Dad:" don't you want us to come with you? " he's hurt, I stand up and go sit on his lap
Me:" I want all of you there daddy and I'm happy you want to experience everything with me " I hug him
Sicelo:" then why do you look so sad baby sis? "
Mah:" she's scared " I look at her smile
Me:" I'm happy and scared mah. I feel like I will wake up and find that it was all a dream and just wishful thinking "
Dad:" don't be scared baby. No one is going to take you away from us ever again and all of this is....us, its a reality we never thought we would live but here we are today "
Me:" I'm thankful to have all of you in my life and I love you "
Sicelo:" It's okay to miss thami too and uncle victor "
Me:" thami won't take my calls and I haven't talked to uncle victor but I will " thami wont' take my calls and I'm worried about him
Sicelo:" I'll get somenone to look for him and see if he's safe "
Me:" Thank you " my phone rings and it's mbuso "
Me:" uhmmm excuse me I need to take this " I leave them and go to the sitting room
Me:" Hello? "
Mbuso:"..........."
Me:" mbuso? "
Him:" hey, how are you baby mama? " i giggle
Me:" oh really now?, I'm okay baby daddy and you? "
Him :" I have arrived and can't wait to see you and our baby "
Me:" I can't wait to see you too "
Him:" what time must I pick you up? "
Me:" uhmm about that..."
Him:" what's wrong ? "
Me:" nothing is wrong. It's just that mah, dad and my brother are coming along "
Him:" I knew they would want to and I would have been shocked if they didn't want to come "
Me:" you're okay with it? "
Him:" I am baby, they missed out on your childhood and for them it's their way of making up and catching on everything "
Me:" yeah you're right. I like the new you " i smile
Him:" I want to be the man you'll be proud of. Why don't you join me for breakfast then we'll go together to the doctor. They'll find us there "
Me:" I don't think dad is going to allow that? "
Him:" ask your brother, he won't say no "
Me:" he's worse than dad "
Him:" he loves you and can't say no to you. I'll send you the name of the resturant " he hangs up. Mbuso wants my brother to punch him again. I get up and turn and see my brother standing there with his arms crossed.
Me:" bhut' wami omuhle engimthandayo kakhulu " ( my handsome brother that I love very much )
Him:" no. " he says smiling shaking his head
Me:" but i haven't said anything and you're already saying no? "
Him:" what do you want? "
Me:" can we go and have breakfast somewhere "
Him:" mah made your favourite porrige, the one you wanted "
Me:" I don't want it anymore "
Him:" I know you want to go see mbuso and we'll go only because there's something I need to talk to him about "
Me:" what's wrong? "
Him:" just business stuff "
Me:" brother please don't hit him again "
Him:" I won't, go tell mah and dad we're going out, I'm going to change " I go to the kitchen and mah has dished up for me. I sit down and eat.
Mah:" baby daddy on the phone? "
Me:" mah please " i smile and eat my porrige
Her:" I knew it was him when a smile lit your face up "
Me:" he asked me to go have breakfast with him, can i go? "
Her:" what about your appointment? "
Me:" you will come and we'll meet there "
Sicelo:" huh you're eating? "
Me:" I'm done "
Mah:" go, I'll tell your dad I sent you to the mall " I stand up and kiss her cheek then we go.
Sicelo:" where are you meeting him "
Me:" here " I show him the address and we drive there silently
Me:" are you okay big brother? "
Him:" I'm okay luh. It's just that the Mazibuko's are in hiding. They vanished the same day we came here but I have a friend of mine looking for them and he just sent me a message and said they are in Cape town "
Me:" are we all safe from them? "
Him:" very safe. I don't want you worrying about them and stressing. Promise me "
Me:" I won't I promise "
We get to the resturant and head inside and I don't see him. A pretty young girl comes to us.
Her:" good morning my name is thenjiwe. Mr Ngcobo please go to that door and you'll find someone waiting for you and you Miss Ngcobo please follow me " she says smiling
Sicelo:" you're crazy if you think I'm going to send my sister in there alone. Come Luh, lead the way thenjiwe " he takes my hand and we follow her and she takes us to the back of the resturant and it's so beautiful because there are flowers and water fountain there and some people having breakfast
Me:" wow this place is nice "
Sicelo:" I've never been here before and I like it " she shows us to the table and we sit down
Me:" can you go sit somewhere because you're cramping my style big brother " i say giggling
Him:" i'll leave when I see him coming " I roll my eyes and laugh then my brother stops and looks behind me land I follow his eyes and I can't help it but smile.
Him:" I saw this beautiful lady entering the restuarant looking beautiful but something was missing and I knew what was missing. This resturant is also a flourist shop so I asked them to make flowers for you because I knew you will love them" he gives them to me and kisses my cheek. It's a whole buckee of lillies and then he looks at my brother
Sicelo:" ok fine, I'll be inside but I'm not leaving without you and you better behave Gumede " then he leaves us.
Me:" Thank you for the flowers I love them " I put them on the side
Him:" My name is Mbuso Gumede and you are? "
Me:" Lungile Ngcobo, nice to meet you Mr Gumede "
Him:" mr gumede is my dad. Call me mbuso "
Me:" and you can call me Luh " thenjiwe comes and we order and I order english breakfast without eggs because I can't stand them and he orders the same.
Him:" beautiful name and it suits you because you're very beautiful and glowing "
Me:" Thank you, it must be the pregnancy "
Him:" wow, who's the lucky guy "
Me:" baby daddy is the lucky guy "
Him:" that's his name? " he laughs
Me:" yeah my family calls him that " i smile
Him:" is he in the picture or? "
Me:" We dicided to to break up and work on ourselves "
Him:" what if he misses you and wants things to work out between you two "
Me:" If he has worked on himself and sort out his issues and proved to me that he can be the man I can depend on, trust and worthy of me then we'll talk about getting back together "
Him:" I'm attending therapy luh and I told my family the whole truth and my mother is not talking to me and I don't blame her " the food comes and I dig in.
Me:" she'll come around after she has calmed down. I'm glad you're attending therapy beacuse that's very important "
Him:" I had to face some things about me like my abusive beviour to you and..."
Me:" mbuso it's okay. I forgave you and you need to forgive yourself too and let some issues go ".
Him:" my therapist said the same thing too "
Me:" my dad asked me what are your intensions with us because I won't be raising a baby alone "
Him:" I'm here and I'm not going anywhere " and mumbles something I can't hear
Me:" what was that? "
Him:" nothing baby "
We chat, laugh and talk about many things and I'm starting to see a side of mbuso I never thought I would ever see and I like it. It's 12:30 pm and our appointment is at 13:00 pm.
Me:" I had a wonderful lunch, thank you "
Him:" I enjoyed your company and lunch too "
Me:" lets go it's almost time and I don't want to upset dad "
Him:" yeah or he'll give me trouble next week " huh?
Me:" what's going on next week? "
Him:" I meant next time baby. lets go " I take my flowers with me, he pays the bill and we meet my brother outside his car.
Him:" finally, dad and mah are already on their way lets go "
Mbuso:" I'll meet you there, I want to have a word with your brother " he kisses my cheek and i get in and open the backseat window and hear my brother say
Sicelo:" I found buhle. She's at my house in durban "