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Darcy was in no mood to rejoice in his arriving home, for what was the point? He was to leave again in a few days.
He had sent no word of his arrival and so there was no one to greet him. It was not until he was removing his coat in the hall that Georgiana appeared. He gave no reaction to her arrival; he was to tired and drained.
Georgiana approached him hesitantly, uncertainty in her posture; nevertheless, when she spoke her voice was calm and controlled.
"Are you alright?"
He sighed, still determined not to burden her with his troubles.
"Well enough."
"Is your business in London completed?"
"No, I shall be returning in a few days."
Georgiana looked sad, but smiled.
"Then come, we must make the most of your time here with us."
She gently but firmly took his arm and lad him to the drawing room.
Bingley and his family were sitting in the drawing room, quietly talking and did not notice the Darcys' entrance until Darcy sat down.
"Darcy!" said Bingley in pleasant surprise. "You are back. Hopefully, this time for some duration?"
"No, only for a few days. I need to be back in London by Monday."
His guests were disheartened; Miss Bignley most of all.
"I hope this business of yours can be concluded quickly so that you are free to spend more time with your friends," said she.
"As do I," replied he, thinking of one particular aquaintance of his.
"What a lot of business you must have to do during the course of the year, Mr Darcy. How dreadfully dull I would think it; I admire your perseverance."
"Thank you."
"After all, I believe there are few who can manage such a large estate, as well as so many tenants, large fortune and more without any assistance whatsoever."
Darcy made no answer.
"Such duty reflects a character of strength, one who should be proud of their situation in life. Though someI believe it is something that everyone should have. One cannot have too much of pride, after all."
Darcy closed his eyes for a brief minute, reminded of one incident when he had realised that pride was his worst fault.
He was forever indebted to Elizabeth for opening his eyes. If it had not been for her, he would never have known. As painful as the incident at Hunsford had been, it was a test of Darcy's self, and if his meeting with Elizabeth had been any indication, he was well on his way to becoming a better man.
Maybe this trial was another test and though it may be better for him, the price for it was that Elizabeth would never be a part fo his future.
Bingley, seeing his friend was tiring of his sister's conversation, said, "I hope your journey was - "
"It would be such a pity if men such as yourself, Mr Darcy, were to change their ways," interrupted Miss Bingley. "Heaven forbid such an action! think of the impact on society!"
"I may have believed that once in the past, Miss Bingley, but now I believe that perhaps it would be a boon for society if everyone were to humble themselves," said Darcy coldly, not at all attracted by Miss Bingley's opinion on the subject. "And I also believe that society would benefit still more if people concentrated more on improving themselves instead of belittling others."
Miss Bingley was stunned into silence.
"And on the subject of pride," continued Darcy, rising from his seat, "I have learnt through experience that too much pride can be one of the greatest faults of a man - or woman. Miss Elizabeth Bennet was kind enough to point that out to me some time ago and though it was a hard lesson to learn, I now believe that she was perfectly correct."
He knew he was being rude to his friend's sister, but his dealings with Wickham and Lydia had given him a short temper.
Darcy paused before exiting the room.
"If you will excuse me, I have some work to complete."
He left and headed for his study.
It was some time later when all the paper work regarding the future of George Wickham and Lydia Bennet was completed. When all had been done, Darcy leaned his head back, tempted to just fall asleep where he sat.
A quiet knock on the door prevented him from sinking into slumber.
"Enter."
Georgiana walked through the door. Darcy shook himself into a semblence of conciousness and said,
"Good evening. Have our guests retired for the night?"
"Yes." She came and stood just in front of him. "I understand that Miss Bingley has been less than pleasing to you lately, brother. I believe that perhaps she may deign to add some civility in her tone now when she speaks of Miss Elizabeth Bennet."
Darcy smiled tiredly.
"That itself is a blessing."
"But you cannot blame her for her behaviour, brother," continued she. "I think ever since she has been aware of your attraction to Miss Bennet she has been jealous and felt challenged by her. She has tried to gain your affections for so long, and now to have all her efforts rendered worthless by a lady who has not even tried to make you love her must make her feel quite angry."
"It does not excuse her from insulting Miss Bennet in our own house," replied Darcy. "I hope you were not shaken by her mentioning Wickham."
"I was surprised," admitted Georgiana, "But I managed to regain myself not dwell on the matter. Miss Bennet was most kind. Fitzwilliam," asked Georgiana, "does she know about our involvement with him? I got that impression when she had been speaking to Miss Bingley."
"Georgiana, I hope you do not mind, but yes, i have told her. Do not worry, I trust her with my life and she will not reveal what happened that summer."
"I am of your opinion."
Darcy did not answer. Elizabeth had not told anyone of his dealings with Wickham, but if she had then Lydia would not have gone to Brighton and Wickham would not have eloped with her and . . .
Stop that. No more 'ifs'; it has happened and you cannot change the past, only affect the future.
Georgiana looked at her brother questioningly.
"What is your business, that had you hurrying to London? Is it something to do with Miss Bennet? The business only arose when you returned from visiting her in Lambton, and she left half an hour later."
"Georgiana, I do not wish to trouble you with my burdens," said Darcy, beginning the old argument again.
"Fitzwilliam, I am no longer a child, though you still see me as one. I would like to know."
"Georgiana . . . "
"You have protected me and cared for me for so long, but you cannot do that forever; there are others you must do that for. I am growing up; I have a right to know."
Darcy looked at his sister. Though little more than sixteen, her figure was well-formed, her air dignified and her appearance womanly and graceful. She was very similar to their mother, both in form and spirit.
She is growing-up - and soon she will marry and leave me here. All alone . . .
"If you put it that way, I shall tell you."
Georgiana sat in a nearby chair while Darcy related to her the whole of his activities since he had seen Elizabeth in Lambton. He told her of how he finally bribed Mrs Younge, Georgiana's former companion, how he found the fugitives and arranged Lydia's marrige to Wickham.
"The wedding is on Monday, and I must attend," said he, carefully gauging his sister's reaction.
Georgiana was sitting still, her eyes wide. She said nothing for some minutes, while Darcy began to dread that he had done the wrong thing.
"Why are you doing all of this for him?" she asked finally.
Darcy breathed a sigh of relief.
"I am certainly not doing this for him, dearest," he replied. "It is more for Lydia and her family."
"All of the Bennet family?" said Georgiana with one raised eyebrow.
"Yes, all of them," said he smiling.
"I believe you," she said in a tone that implied the opposite."
Darcy shook his head.
"You are doing all of this for no other reason than your love for Miss Elizabeth."
He smiled at her.
"Yes, my clever little sister, you are quite correct. But it is late, and I think we should both sleep."
When he went to bed, Darcy found that he was calmer and happier than he would have been had he stayed in London. He could almost forget the past week, almost forget Wickham, Lydia, Wickham's fear of him, Lydia's defiance, Elizabeth . . .
There is no more need for tears, my dearest Elizabeth, he said silently. I have secured the security and reputation of your family and there will be no more need for tears.
No tears, except for his, for his own happiness that now could never be.
Georgiana will find someone, Bingley has Jane, (here he swore to bring his friend happiness by reuniting him with Jane Bennet) And I have no one.
On Monday I am attending a wedding - the unification of a couple that do not truly care for each other, but a wedding all the same.
Yet another reminder that while men and women around him were finding people whom they could share their lives with, he had no one.
Elizabeth will also find someone to care for her, protect her, love her.
I just wish that it was me.