I posted an announcement on my profile that this chapter was going to be late — posted around 9am EST — because it wasn't ready at midnight. For those of you who didn't see that, I apologize but it's still update day! So I hope you enjoy chapter 81 :)
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Where Aiden took her wasn't what she was expecting at all. When he walked them to the beach with all the certainty in the world, the two of them settling beneath a tree Marley was overwhelmed with how well her boyfriend understood her.
She was assuming they'd go for a drive somewhere. Aiden isn't exactly the kind to choose such a calm surrounding, preferring activity and excitement. But he seemed more then content when he pulled her into a straddle on his lap and she nestled into the crook of his neck, her arms wrapped around his torso from beneath his jacket.
The sound of the waves crashing, spare forest noises and distant voices of other campers passing by was all that filled the air between them for a while. It was a lovely consolation that everything was going to be alright.
"Elena called me. The girl that Trish was bullying." Marley elaborated her identity for Aiden's sake.
She left the solace of his shoulder to be face-to-face. He raised a questioning eyebrow, brushing his thumbs along her hips from outside her jacket. "What did she have to say?"
Marley took a deep breath, "She's putting the baby up for adoption. That she was sending Jordan updates and he didn't seem to care. That Trish — Jordan's girlfriend — called her and they talked."
"Wow," Aiden muttered, "The last part...I can't imagine those two talking about anything."
"Me either," Marley admitted, "But it was nice closure. And what else was she going to do about the baby? It would...have no father." She played with the lapels of his jacket, staring down at her hands. "No decent one, anyway. Apparently the new family are amazing and ultimately, it gives the child a better life."
"Family doesn't have to be blood," Aiden said.
"Speaking of, have you spoken to Ian lately? I haven't had the chance to call him."
"Today," he responded, "He was hanging out with Dylan and the Texan girl. Apparently they all get along really well."
Marley felt a small smile lift her lips. Aiden's words felt like a sun through the cloudiness of her day. Not only was his brother and someone Marley loved free to be himself at an accepting school, with a boy who was good to him and that he was in love with, but he also found a friend outside of his relationship. Vanessa — someone spunky and badass who Marley was looking forward to meeting in person.
"It feels like so long ago that you were worried about Ian finding friends."
"I was worried — before I knew about Dylan."
Marley studied his expression carefully, watching his eyes flicker towards the waves, distant. After another minute of perception, she traced his jaw with her thumb. "It still bothers you. That he kept it a secret."
His eyes flickered to hers again, his hands tightening around her waist, "I should've been the person he went to when he came back from the park after meeting Dylan that first night and not months later. I should've been more of his brother than a parent."
"You're the best brother anyone could ask for," Marley said firmly, her eyes remaining locked into his to establish more seriousness behind her words. "And anyone you love always feels safe and open and cared for. Don't take it personally. Coming out can be hard for someone no matter who it is they're breaking the news to."
He leaned his head back against the tree, "That's what Ian told me."
"You've gone above and beyond in being his family. He loves you and it was something he needed to come to terms with alone. In this society being straight is so mainstream and broadcasted that anyone realizing they're gay is a confusing time. It shouldn't be like that but it is and that's not something you can singlehandedly fix."
Aiden exhaled a long breath, pulling her tighter against him and nodding, "I just want to be good for him."
"You are. You always have been, and you always will be."
If only he could see it. The way Ian looks at him. The way Ian holds him and gravitates around him. The way he speaks so highly of his older brother.
The way Marley does. The way Leo was desperate to get his best friend back after they had a fight.
If only he could see how the people who get to see underneath, who are important to him wouldn't know what to do if they weren't anymore.
Those thoughts brought Marley back to her dark place. The place Tristan's video brought her to. She found herself staring at his face silently, knowing she wasn't doing a good enough job of hiding her feelings.
It's easy to feel dejected seeing girls more beautiful, more confident, and more experienced all over Aiden. Girls who can give him things she isn't comfortable with yet. It's easy to feel insignificant in comparison to them.
Marley played with his hair while Aiden pursed his lips, sliding his hands beneath her jacket and pressing his palms against her bare back. When she jolted at the cold on the surface of his skin, he smiled lightly, but it faded quickly.
"Say I didn't get into Brown. Hypothetically."
It took Marley a few seconds to digest his words as she was caught up in her own head. Even when she did process them, she was confused.
"But you did get into Brown."
"Yes. But pretend I didn't," Aiden corrected quickly. "Say I had to go to Notre Dame no matter what."
Marley wondered why he was making her imagine that. Hundreds of miles apart for four years. It made her fingers and legs tighten around him instantly. It made her heart ache. She inhaled shakily, "I don't like that hypothetical."
Aiden lifted a hand to tuck her hair behind her ear, "Me either. But if we pretend it was real for a second, a lot would change but one thing. Do you know what I'm going to say that one thing is?"
She sighed, staring at his neck, "Us, right?"
Aiden tilted her chin up with his hand, holding it there so their eyes could stay locked. His were piercing through her own, the blue reflecting the waves and the overcast sky beautifully.
"It's you for me, Marley."
"Aiden-"
"Any distance between us doesn't change that. Other girls coming onto me don't change that. Our relationship is no one else's business but ours and if anyone else in the future decides to make it their business they will always have to answer to me. But most importantly of all is this."
He cupped her cheeks and brushed his thumbs gently beneath her eyes as he scanned over her face with a firm, sincere expression, "That will not happen between us until you are one hundred percent ready for it to, until you tell me you want it to. However long that takes doesn't change the fact that it is now only you for me. Okay?"
"Okay," she whispered resting a hand over his heart. Racing. It was a successful distraction. "Why is your heart beating so fast?"
"Because you're kind of feeling me up right now."
Marley blushed lightly, realizing her other hand was resting on his hip and not around his torso. She settled both back around his neck while he grinned, sliding a hand outside her shirt and along her hip, tracing along her thigh. Marley inhaled sharply while he blinked at her innocently.
"A-Aid-"
"Shh," he murmured, leaning in to press his lips right against her soft spot. She jumped. Two fingers of his free hand not massaging her thigh pressed against a vein on the side of her neck.
"Racing." He smiled into her skin.
"Shut up," is all she could manage to say.
Aiden laughed, "You tease me enough to have to even the score between us. Being friends with you was torture."
Marley rolled her eyes with a scoff, "You're Aiden Matthews so yes, I'm aware you can't keep it in your pants."
He grinned and it was sheepish, "The day we met...well...I kind of wanted to..."
Marley's mouth fell open. She smacked his arm, "Hook up with me?!?!"
He raised his hands in surrender at her expression — offended and flustered, "Until I realized that you had been through a lot and weren't interested. So I never came onto you like that or made you uncomfortable."
"Cut to every innuendo."
"Touché." He chuckled, his arms relaxing around her torso again, "But they're just jokes that I won't stop making anytime soon. I love teasing you."
Marley scowled at him, "You just admitted you wanted me to be your next booty call and you're still going. Bury your hole even deeper why don't you."
Aiden smirked, tilting to see behind her back, "You do have a great booty-OW! I get pinched for that?"
"You get pinched for wanting to hook up with me as soon as you saw me."
He tilted his head with a small smile, "I did. Realizing that you didn't was weird. I wanted to spend time with you but if we weren't going to...I-I didn't..."
"You didn't know how," she whispered. It made sense. Aiden's used to girls that throw themselves at him. He never has to make an effort and his best friend has known him forever.
With those thoughts in mind came a startling realization. Marley's eyes widened.
"Oh. My. Gods."
"What?"
"You..." Marley felt a wide teasing grin stretch across her cheeks, "You wanted to be friends with me and you didn't know how! So you-"
"Marley-"
"-buy Wuthering Heights for something in common. Get Leo to move us up the Tims line. Force me to move back to your bus-"
"Stop-"
"-so you can get to know me. Freak out when I want to sit with Jason because you thought you would be replaced. Handing me your stuff in the football field. Dragging me by my shirt to our table for trivia! Inviting me to the beach! You wanted to be my friend and had no idea how because you're so used to people falling at your feet. You never had to win Leo. You've almost never initiated friendships before. So you were the equivalent to a kid who never learned his table manners."
By this point, Aiden was scratching the back of his neck, shrunk in on himself and sheepish. "Shut up," he mumbled.
Oh how the 'tables' have turned.
Marley's smile widened further. She was beyond flattered, "It's so...cute."
"Do not call me cute," Aiden growled at her.
Marley slid her fingers through his hair, deciding to put the guy out of his misery, and stifle her smile. "I'm not making fun of you. Making a friend was a first for me too because Gabby and I connected when we were young. It made me feel really special," she admitted quietly, "that you stayed."
"I don't usually talk about myself, my brother, or my life. Even to Leo. But with you...I've never been able to talk to someone the way I talk to you," Aiden told her softly. "It's always been so...easy."
"I know," Marley agreed. Thinking about her night in the closet. Telling him about her family. Her doubts and her sadness and her pain. Leaning on him in times of need. Being vulnerable. "I know exactly how that feels. That night with you in-in the closet it...I trusted you. Blindly. It wasn't something I've ever done before."
"The four wheelers," he said with a thoughtful smile. "Talking about Ian. The advice you gave me. You're always honest and I was surrounded by 'yes men' jocks. I knew you were the only one who could tell me the truth and understand. And after everything was better with Ian I knew I needed you. I knew you meant something to me." Aiden kissed her forehead while she hummed, closing her eyes.
When she opened them, she stared at him with a childlike curiosity.
"Why do you hide this?" She asked, gripping the collar of his jacket.
Aiden frowned, tucking her flyaways behind her right ear, "Hide what?"
She scanned over his face, studying carefully for his initial reaction. "The best parts of you. Your kindness. How you love. You're not cold-hearted. You sat in front of me and told me you didn't want to be that anymore but you never were. Telling me that was proof. You just hide who you are as a person. Why?"
His expression blanked for a moment. He looked away from her, his eyes melting from emotionless to thoughtful. He took a deep breath, still staring at the waves as he responded.
"I guess I never knew what trust meant until you. I never knew what being vulnerable meant..." he trailed off, his eyes locking on hers again. "Until you. It was never...growing up was..." he sighed.
A few seconds of silence later, he was focused on Marley again, cupping her cheeks and bending to level their gazes. "You have my heart, Hoover. Take care of it for me?" He whispered with a gentle smile.
Marley wiggled herself as close as she could, resting her forehead against his. In an instinctual, entirely innocent action, she took his hand, sliding it along the bare skin of her chest, pressing it over her heart. Racing. "Ditto," she whispered, her eyes boring into his.
His hand suddenly felt so warm, so intimate. When he held it there, brushing his thumb in gentle circles over more sensitive skin, Marley squeezed her eyes shut and took shaky breaths. His exhale was warm against her mouth, his nose brushing against hers. He didn't move his hand. She didn't ask him to.
"Marley," he hummed gently.
"Y-yes?"
He exhaled again. Her lips ached for contact with his.
"Kiss me."
She opened her eyes. Already so wound up inside. "You never-you never ask to kiss me," she whispered.
He tilted his head sideways, smiling, "And I didn't. I asked you."
His eyes lowered to her lips. He took his lower one in his mouth, still watching hers with an intense gaze. She froze in surprise and apprehension, her cheeks burning red in humiliation and shyness. "Aiden..."
"You made the first move on Christmas Day no problem," He pointed out.
Marley's fingers squeezed around his hair when he brushed his fingers gently along her collarbone from beneath her shirt. Teasing. "You...those were-Super Bowl tickets. To the freaking Super Bowl," she managed to say breathlessly. "It's...the Super Bowl."
"Yeah," he murmured absentmindedly, his hand lifting to brush his thumb along the seam of her lips, leaving warmth and tingles behind. She swore she fainted for one tenth of a millisecond.
"Will you? Kiss me? I will bite," he said throatily, locking eyes with her briefly to wink while her neck turned scarlet.
The fact that Aiden can still render her a mute, dumb, desperate mess is unnerving. Nevertheless, she had enough of her intact to lean in, her arms wrapping around his neck properly. She wasn't sure the place in her mind that Aiden Matthews brought her to existed until he did.
He bumped his nose with hers. Marley took a deep breath. "Why are you being shy, spitfire?" He asked softly. A humorous, dark smile dancing on his lips, "Is the only sober exception to that Super Bowl tickets? Because it's sadly a once a year kind of tradeoff. However, if you're open to negotiation with many other great offers on the table-"
"Shut up, Matthews," she told him, before her lips were pressing against his own.
When Aiden tilted her jaw fractionally, his mouth moving slowly, languidly with her own, Marley knew it wasn't just emotionally that they were so compatible. Not even close.
Physically is the kind of sparks that aren't supposed to exist outside of the books or movies. But they do.
They were in a public space and it was a stupid idea for many reasons to continue —something more heated than ever — right here and now, but Marley found herself forgetting them all when Aiden tugged her lower lip between his teeth.
Her mouth parted without Aiden needing to ask. She felt when he finally decided not to kiss her slow, so in tune to him by now. Her fingers tugged on his hair. It elicited a groan from him, one Marley was expecting. It was one of his weaknesses. Another was sliding her hand into the collar of his shirt on the back of his neck. Her fingers brushed along his spine, the way he tightened his hands around her hips acted as approval.
She personified fire with every passing second of this beautiful torture, between two people who have more chemistry than either know what to do with. Chemistry that would never dilute, never fade away. It would burn as brightly as their love into wherever their lives took them next.
Everything Aiden was doing to her sent Marley's heart in overdrive. When she ran out of air he never relented and now was no exception, his lips moving down her neck and always leaving her as frazzled as the first time.
She was losing more and more of her mind, her hands sliding beneath the hemline of his shirt and acting on their own accord. They caressed the chiseled muscles of his abdomen, causing Aiden to suck in a harsh breath, and nip at her collarbone.
His mouth was hungrily lowering beyond her throat and leaving her a flustered mess. He had easy access with her v-neck. Maybe in another circumstance she would've mentioned something, but they both lost all control.
His right hand found her shoulder, inching into her ponytail. The elastic was gone, slid effortlessly around his wrist.
His fingers gripped at her freed hair as he spoke throatily against her mouth. "I'm burning all of your elastics one of these days," he murmured. "They're so goddamn annoying."
Marley couldn't even reply to his comment, too out of it right now, pushing herself closer to his kisses and he met her halfway, the sounds outside of the waves crashing their loud, heavy breathing. Her fingers found his hair again, gripping tighter when he squeezed her thighs, holding their bodies as close together as was physically possible.
His lips were chaste and quick back up her neck, pressing against hers and kissing her again. And again. And again. It was endless desire, it was pulling away for a handful of seconds to scan along her face, her mouth, before he was back to kissing her again.
When Marley ran out of air. Aiden returned his assault lower while she struggled to breathe. Her hands slid around his torso from under his shirt, finding his shoulders. "Cristo. You're killing me, Marley," he growled.
Marley's stomach flipped in on itself at the Italian that left his mouth. That's when she knows he's gone for her beyond sanity and she found it irresistible.
"Discussing murder during a make-out, really, dude? What a mood killer."
No.
No.
No.
For once in she and Aiden's relationship Marley was as annoyed as he was at being interrupted. Right now, the desire to drive Leo somewhere blindfolded and leave him there was so strong.
Mostly because he'd never, ever be able to find his way back.
They stilled, but Aiden didn't reveal his face and it was humiliating given it was inside the front of her shirt by now. Marley kept her eyes closed, trying to breathe properly. Make sense of what she was just doing. On a public beach. During the freaking day.
"Fuck off Kahn.
"But-"
"Walk away. Now."
Marley shivered at his icy tone.
"I'm here to visit my local public beach is all. Enjoy the terrible cloudy weather, walk through the sticky damp sand. Watch the mating of local wildlife. I mean what a letdown. Who knew the process involved so much clothing, groping and chitchat? Don't the animals usually get into it doggy style with no further adieu? Thank blondie and Words with Friends for that new term. I thought it was some sex thing so she had to clear that up-"
Aiden's head lifted. He stared at the place behind her body to where she assumed Leo was standing. "Stop. Talking."
Marley knew it would be impossible to quantify the embarrassment that was flooding through her at the fact that Leo Kahn once again caught she and her boyfriend all over each other like bunnies in heat.
She had no clue what transpired between them as the silence stretched on because she was too focused on how her body was burning and her breathing was ragged and she wasn't sure if she wanted to run away full speed or slap herself silly.
"There's a big group following a few paces behind me. You're welcome asshole. Feel free to take this back to the guys cabin, though I just took a huge dump so our whole room smells like shit-"
Aiden's expression must've been terrifying for Leo to cut himself off and leave in silence. Marley didn't blame him one bit. With how intimidating Aiden's glares can be, she would've left too.
Her hands left the taut, warm skin of his chest to grip his shirt, trying to stop her head from spinning.
"Fuck," Aiden whispered, leaning his head back against the tree. His eyes squeezed shut. "I'm sorry about him. Are you okay?"
"Yes," Marley replied quietly, still beyond overwhelmed.
"Bad place. Bad idea. My fault. I know it's-I didn't mean to-I just...I can't...think, with you."
"Ditto," Marley said softly, hiding in his shoulder. Her entire skin was beyond hot. It wasn't exactly like her to start a heated make-out session in a public place, let alone one as intense as that.
He held her close, their position under a tree mostly out of view and not raising any suspicions as Marley heard the group Leo was referring to, pass by. They both remained quiet, Marley's hand finding his heart again and feeling it threaten to burst from his chest.
After another minute, the voices faded as whoever decided to go to the beach made their way to the shoreline. The heat in Marley's body was subsiding as her breathing evened in tune with Aiden's.
She wondered if this was what Sarah meant when she spoke about so-called 'Lady Boners.'
"You bought it."
"I bought it?" She questioned, confused.
Aiden's arms tightened around her torso, "You bought the red bra. From Victoria's Secret in the mall."
Marley's face burned once she put together that she was definitely wearing said infamous bra right now. When they went to the mall as friends, she and the girls branched off to VS while the guys busied themselves around the rest of the mall. Aiden texted her a couple suggestions that she never asked for, mentioning a red bra on a display mannequin.
"I-I bought it first! Before you ever texted!" She squeaked, embarrassed beyond belief.
"Either way it looks really good on you," Aiden told her absentmindedly. "Not that anything wouldn't look good on you, but I like the red."
"Aiden," she whined, praying he would stop while he was ahead. Also praying that she would forget all about the fact that she took a mental note of his words.
"Let's move on for both our sakes, hm. Talk to me about something."
Half of Marley's brain cells were scattered beyond saving. Everything was still humming. She squeezed his shirt tighter.
Until the most ridiculous thing that could have happened, happened.
Pouring rain. Drenching, heavy rain.
In seconds the entire beach was soaked, hard pelts sending a mist into the air. The tree they were under was thin and provided almost no protection, so they were quickly scrambling from the ground.
The laughter followed, Marley barely able to run as she lost it at how drenched they both were, dashing for cover from the mess hall with their jackets over their heads to protect themselves as best as they could given the circumstances.
Their shoes squeaking on the front porch wood, their clothes dripping and damp, Marley and Aiden were full on laughing as they stared at themselves.
"Nature's cold shower." Aiden winked while Marley cupped her hands beneath a drain pipe.
Once she had enough water she tossed it at his face when he was too busy running his fingers through his hair, manically giggling at his stupefied expression.
Hugging herself from the cold, Aiden chose to hold her instead of getting even like he normally would. She welcomed his warmth eagerly, but he was quickly tilting up her chin, his other hand tucking her hair behind her ear to be face-to-face.
Marley's hazel eyes scanned over him, momentarily speechless at how Aiden's shirt and leather jacket clung to his chest. At how his dark brown hair fell damp over his forehead. At how blue his eyes always are — electric and stunning. How sharp his jaw, accentuating stubble that she felt when they kissed. And his lips, parted. Soft and still swollen.
The rain poured, their soppy clothes and drenched shoes becoming more unbearable by the minute — but she was far more invested in how effortlessly breathtaking the person in front of her truly was, to care about anything else.
Before this very moment, Marley had no idea that it was possible to fall in love with the same person more than once, while still actively loving them. But now she was certain one could, because she had just fallen in love with Aiden Matthews — all over again.
His eyes were scanning over her face, too. It was the same look from yesterday and last week and two months ago. Unchanged. Always as if seeing her for both the first and last time simultaneously.
"I asked you to take care of my heart, but it's also yours to break," he said, speaking with more volume to be heard over the torrential downpour. "And right now is how I know it's worth giving to you anyway."
Marley parted her lips to speak. They opened and closed. Trying to find the right words and failing miserably. Sometimes what Aiden said made her throat ball up like yarn and three words never enough.
He pressed a damp finger to her mouth before she could speak gibberish, shaking his head with a soft, lopsided smile she would cherish all her life.
"Let's get out of this rain."
***
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