I woke up to the sound of laughter—Niall’s laughter. Once I’d creaked one eye open, I saw him jump over the fence to come sit next to me. I could smell the beer coming off him, and I wondered exactly how drunk he was. We sat in silence for a while before I leaned my head on his shoulder, silently asking to be held. I’m not usually the one to initiate affection because, still, he makes me weird. I don’t want him to think I’m clingy or anything, but right now I just need some kind of regard.
“Aw,” He mumbled before sliding his arm around me waist. “I’m guessing the dinner didn’t go well?” I shook my head. “You should’ve had a food-fight. That would’ve made everything—” I shook my head again. When he continued his tone was serious, “It was that bad?”
I resisted the urge to nod. “Yeah.”
“What happened?” He whispered, tracing the tip of his nose along my jaw. “Tell Daddy what’s wrong.” I couldn’t help but laugh. Only he could get a chuckle out of me no matter what mood I’m in.How does he do it?
“C.L. were screaming at each other.” I paused and shifted closer to him. “Chip said I…” I stopped short. It suddenly hit me that Chip was right; I did come between Niall and his girlfriend when it comes down to it. But it wasn’t like how Chip was trying to make it sound…there was more behind it than just ‘you were the side-bitch’.
I rephrased. “Do you miss what you had with Eileen?” He stiffed against me.
“Uh…why?”
“Answer,” I begged.
He swallowed before shaking his head, “No, I don’t.” I let out a relieved breath. “Hunter…she and I were just…we were just for sex, yaknow? Even when we were dating, she didn’t talk to me like you do. She doesn’t know stuff about me that you do. I mean, I liked her sometimes, but most of the time…” He trailed off rubbing his free hand through his hair. “And I didn’t like how she talked about you.” He mumbled. “Why are you asking?”
“I just wanted to know.” It wasn’t a complete lie.
“Are you mad at me?” He pulled back to look me in the eye.
I shook my head, “No, no. I’m not mad.” He gave me a small smile before pecking me on the cheek. “Hug?” I whispered. I didn’t get a verbal response, but he wrapped his other arm around me, pulling my body into his lap. For a while we just sat there hugging in silence.
After a couple minutes though, a pending question popped into my head. Sometimes the thoughts are sprinkled into my brain and I just think…he must miss having sex since he used to do it so often. But he’s never said anything to me about it, nor did he try anything. We haven’t even gone past second base—to which we’ve only been to twice. Part of me knew it was because of the Alec thing, and another part of me screamed that it was because I’m just a friend.
There’s only a month and a week left…how do I get out of the friendzone? How can I be more? I’m not trying to fuck and chuck him…but I want to be…that way with him. And I can’t just come out and say it, right? I mean that would be weird.
My thoughts were distracted as he started kissing along my neck, humming a low song I couldn’t recognize. Desire burst inside of me…
“How was your guy time?” I breathed.
He shrugged as he grabbed one of my legs to swing it around so I was straddling him. “Was too many girls there for it to be guy time.” He mumbled against my skin. Girls? “I wished you were there.”
“To be your wingman?” I half joked.
“No,” he shook his head. “So you can kiss me with these soft lips.” I laughed and rolled my eyes as he gave me a peck. “And I just wanted to be with you…like now.” (Aka: we would’ve just talked the whole time) “I’m still a bit buzzed.”
Yes! I like when Niall’s buzzed. He’s funny. But he’s also exactly the same as he usually is only a little more blunt and flirty. I could have a serious conversation with him—like now— or flirt shamelessly without being questioned—like I’m about to do—because he’ll barely remember it anyway. Perfect!
“Hey, Ni?”
“Hmm?”
“I want something…” I tilted my head as I looked into his oblivious eyes.
“Like what?”
I smiled, “Like…” I walked my first two fingers down to the button of his shorts. “This.”
“Really?!” he laughed and I nodded. “It’s yours baby, where do you want it? When?” It’s mine?!
“Hold on there, tiger. I want some info first.”
“You want everything, don’t you?” He smirked. “What info?”
I ran my fingers over the apex of his shorts, skimming over what was underneath. He grunted. “We’re playing your true or not true game.”
“No games, Hunter.” He growled.
“But I know you like games.”
He pouted, “Not during times like this.” I ignored him.
“First question,” I mumbled. I increased the pressure on my hand a little, making him squirm a bit. “You got with someone at that party.”
“No, you weren’t there.” Butterflies.
I smiled, kissing him once. That’s all I really wanted to know. The rest of this is just for my own pleasure. I gave him another, harder, kiss. “You want me to press harder.” I whispered.
I deflated when he shook his head. “Get in the pool with me.” My eyebrows shot up in surprise. Nightly swim? Should I? His hands squeezed at my back side with a cocky smirk. “Or kiss me.”
“Those aren’t even on the same level.” I laughed.
“Not true if I have anything to do with it.” He didn’t give me a chance to smile before he crushed his lips to mine, his tongue already down my throat. I squeaked in surprise, making his chest rumbled with what sounded like a chuckle. He leaned forward until I was on my back underneath him and our breathing picked up. I wrapped my legs around him, my hands fisted his hair, and sounds of crickets and moaning filled the air as we rubbed against each other.
Suddenly he pulled back, gasping as if he just remembered something. “Sleepover after B’s fancy dinner!” I giggled at his random thought. “No, really. I know both your parents will be gone and so will Greg; it’s perfect!”
“Perfect for what, exactly…?” I questioned. Is he talking about just making out, or more? Maybe this is just the beer talking. He did taste heavily of beer…
“For anything.”
I pretended to think about it. “Sure I’ll sleepover.”
“Yes, Hunter.” He laughed before pushing himself off of me. “We’ll finish this then.” Finish?! “You know it’s four in the morning?”
“It is?!”
“Only you would fall asleep outside. You’re so weird.” He started getting to his feet, but I lunged towards him, tackling him to the ground. “Argh!” He grunted as I fell on top of him.
“Sleep with me.” I whispered. His eyes got impossibly wide and I knew exactly what he was thinking for once. “N—no, not like that! Not right now. I mean out here with me…” He was still tense under me. No, Niall. Please don’t get weird. I placed my ear over his heart, snuggling on top of him, to try to get him to relax. His heart was pounding in his chest and I started to get worried. Is he okay? “Ni?”
“Hmm?”
“You okay?”
“Mhm…” His arms wrapped around me, cradling my head to his chest. “You’re very…unpredictable tonight.”
“Am I?”
“You don’t usually……I don’t know.” I assumed it was going on a drunken ramble, so I didn’t think about prying.
I swallowed and tightened my arms around him. “I’m still kind of upset about the dinner.” He kissed the top of my head.
“Did anything get fixed?”
“No. I just…I want Louis and Chip to be close again. I’d rather fight Chip on my own than have them fighting each other.”
He ‘shh’ed me. “They’ll work it out Hunter.”
“I hope.”
——
——
I sprayed toothpaste all over the sink as I read Niall’s text message.
Niall: I may not have said anything when we woke up this mornin I wasn’t THAT buzzed to forget anything that happened last night
I stood there with my mouth wide open. He’s going to think I’m clingy now! What was I thinking?!
Niall: I still want you to sleep over tonight
My hand clapped over my mouth ignoring that I was getting toothpaste all over it. I didn’t think he was being serious about that! I thought it was just a drunken promise. Holy shit!
Niall:I can show you my room
Niall: and guitar
Me: okay
I mean, what was I supposed to say?!
Niall: are you working today?
Me: yup
Niall: scum, maybe I’ll get out of bed to have lunch with you
Me: if you want to…
Niall: do you want me to?
I typed yes, but then deleted it.
Me: maybe
Niall: yes or no
Niall: you weren’t shy about anything last night. Don’t start now.
I was so embarrassed. I should’ve given him a breathalyzer before I said anything to him last night—to make sure he in fact was drunk. With a sigh, I reluctantly pushed away my aloof behavior and just told him I wanted to have lunch with him.
Niall: I’ll be there:)
“Ooh, who are you texting with that smile?” El asked, walking into the bathroom.
I blushed, “My friend Niall.”
“The famous Niall!” She smiled, “Louis’ told me about you two.”
“Has he?” I frowned. “What did he say?”
“Just that you really like him.”
“Oh…well yeah…”
“Well you know what this means, right?” She said crossing her arms. I gave her a confused look. “I have to meet him. No boy talks with you without my approval.”
I laughed, “He’ll be here tonight. We have a double date with my friends Brice and Liam.”
“Lovely, I’ll grill him then.”
“Don’t scare him!”
She waved her hand, “I won’t make any promises.”
We were silent for a while as we both brushed our teeth, making faces at each other and doing stupid dance moves to imaginary music. After a couple minutes we’d finished our morning hygiene routine and the inevitable topic of C.L. was upon us.
“Louis and I were walking upstairs while Chip was walking down. It seemed to be less tension.” She paused, twisting up her mouth as she braided her hair. “They didn’t say anything to each other though.”
“I guess less tension is better than nothing.” I mumbled. “It’s a start.”
“Wise words.”
I smiled and changed the subject, “Will you braid my hair too?” She returned my smile, her face lighting up with freshly brushed teeth.
“Of course.
——
“What about this one?” Mom said holding up a long green flowing dress. I cringed—honestly I only brought that just in case I got invited to a wedding or something. Not that I know many people getting married. Eileen’s sister was getting married—sometime soon actually, but, needless to say that invitation has been flushed down the toilet. I’m not complaining though.
“That’s too dressy.”
She sighed and went back to rummaging through my closet, “Well Darci’s colleagues are going to be there. This is a big deal; you can’t look like you’re going to the club, Hunter.”
“I know that Mother.” I mumbled.
“I really want you to mingle with those people.” She said distractedly. “You said you want a job the makes you travel. It’ll be hard to get a job straight out of college—and it definitely will be when you’re just starting— so you need to start making your connections now. I want to see my little seed turn into a big beautiful tree. Remember that metaphor from A Bug’s Life?” Her smile was contagious. She always has to make a connection to my childhood.
“Tree’s don’t travel though; they stay in one place for their whole life.”
“That’s just where their roots are, honey. Their branches and spread out wherever they want them to—wherever they can get. But their roots stop them from forgetting where they started from. And that’s what I want from you.” Oh god, this is about to get emotional. “No matter where you are I don’t want you to forget about your family. We may have bad moments but…” She trailed off as she started to choke up. This woman and her emotions, I swear to God.
I tried to keep the mood light, “I’ll send you seven postcards from everywhere I go and a picture of me and a friend a made.”
“Why would I want a picture of you surrounded by a bunch of nothing?” She quipped.
“HEY!” I giggled. “I have friends!”
She laughed and pulled a couple dresses out before turning around to face me. “I’ve decided for you, pick one of these.” I looked between them and groaned. “Sexy?” She shook the right one, “Or cute?” She held up the left. Oh god Mom…
“I don’t care! I don’t want to wear anything.”
“Well too bad. I’m not letting you go naked. Take these and ask the family of their opinion. I vote with the blue.”
“Mom, do I really look like I feel like moving right now?” She threw the dresses on me anyway and I grumbled. “Fine.” I rolled lazily off my bed, grabbing the dresses, and walked out of my room. I went into Dad’s office first. Strangely, the door was open; he never keeps the door open when he’s working from home. I knocked anyway, as I peeked in. “Dad?”
He looked up at me from his laptop, “Hunter?” I sighed and held up the dresses. “I have to choose?”
“Yeah, I don’t care which one, so Mom said I should let the house decide.”
“Ah,” He took his glasses off and knit his fingers together to rest his chin on. He had a concentrated look on his face as he glanced back and forth from each other dresses, to me, then back again. My heart was thumping loudly for some reason. I have no idea why I was so nervous but I was. “Is the white one new? I don’t think I’ve seen it before.”
I nodded, “El brought it over for me.” I paused—alright here I go. I’m going to make a joke while talking to Dad. This is it. Now or never. This is my moment. “And it’s cream not white.” He smiled.NAILED IT!
“Well, I go with thecream one then.” He mocked. “I’m sure you’ll…look nice in both.”Oh Daddy…“And Niall’s driving you?”
“No, he’s just coming here so Brice and Liam can get us at the same time.”
“Oh, alright.” I nodded and stood there awkwardly wondering if I should leave or not. “Well, have fun. You mother and I will be back from our own convention in the morning.” I nodded again.
“Okay…” I backed out of the room, letting out a breath once I was a far enough distance away. That was the first time we had a one-on-one conversation since that fiasco of a dinner last night. It went so well it almost brought a tear to my eye. I wouldn’t cry over something like that though—but I did smile to myself as I walked down the stairs, into the kitchen where Louis and El were.
“Ooh, are these the choices for tonight?” El smiled.
“Yeah,” I sighed. “Pick.”
Both she and Louis did the same thing Dad did, glancing between the dresses and me. I fidgeted as I waited for them to answer. “Cream.” El finally chirped. “One hundred percent cream.”
“What? No, definitely the blue.”
El widened her eyes as she slowly turned her head to look at Louis, “The cream one is so much better Louis, are you blind?”
“No, the blue one is sensible for a young lady like Hunter.” Louis said mockingly turning his nose up. I giggled at the way El tried to hide back her smirk.
“The cream one is sexier.”
Lou frowned, “Who does she need to look sexy for? She’s going to be with a bunch of forty year old doctors.”
“Niall…” She said slowly. I covered my face in embarrassment.
“Oh, for God’s sake.” They both looked back at me. “So which dress is winning?”
“They’re tied.” I grumbled.
“Ask Chip.” El said simply…like she wasn’t there last night. I gave her the ‘are you serious’ look. “You have to start the mending somewhere. The boys are already on their way, so now you have to be to your way with Chip too.” I slumped my shoulders and sighed—she’s right…damn it.
“Fine.” I mumbled. Very, very reluctantly I walked out of the kitchen and into the living room. I stopped at the top of the basement stairs and sighed, yet again. “Chip?” I called.
“What?”
I winced away from his voice. He didn’t sound angry (yet), he just sounded like normal Chip. I couldn’t decide if I was mad at him or just hurt that he thought I was a whore. But now that I thought about it, I really did think I was more hurt. My own brother—whether he was a dickhead or not—thought I was nasty like some hooker on the street. I suddenly didn’t want to face him anymore.
“What is it?” He said. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes.
“Are you in a good mood?” I said warily.
“No, but what do you want.”
I swallowed, “I—I need you to—”
“Hunter I can’t hear anything your fucking saying. Come down here.” My skin crawled but I walked down the stairs anyway. He was lounged across the couch in a pair of denim shorts and a t-shirt that I was pretty sure was Louis’. His face was relaxed, thankfully—no scowl.
“Now what is it?” He said.
“I…” I let out a breath, “Which dress?” I held them up for him to see. He seemed surprised that I would ask him such a thing. It’s not like I’ve asked him for my opinion on my outfit before.
“Um…” He frowned a little as he looked at the dresses. “The white I guess.” I thought about making my joke about it being cream, but decided against it.
I nodded, “Okay, thanks.” Before I could turn around to leave he was on his feet. I flinched a little at his sudden movement—but there wasn’t any reason for me to do that. He stared off to the left.
“Um…Listen…” I froze. Oh no. Oh god what’s he going to say? He glanced at me and his face softened when he saw how tense I was. “Actually sit down; you look like you’re about to run away.” He sunk down onto the couch again. I hesitated but did what he said, sitting a little more than arm’s length away from him. A smile crossed his face and I prepared myself for an insult.
“What’s with the distance? Are you scared of me or something?”
No, you just hurt my fucking feelings. “You called me a home-wrecking whore last night.” I said bluntly. His smile shrank in size, but the amusement from a second ago completely vanished from his eyes. He slung his arm over the back of the couch as his sad eyes moved down to his cushion underneath him.
“You…” he stopped to sigh. “I didn’t mean it…I was pissed. I was pissed at everyone and I said stuff I didn’t mean.” He put a foot on the couch, his eyes still locked on the cushion. “I know it’s a shit excuse…but that’s all I’ve got. And I—I’m sorry.
“I know you think I hate you, but Hunter that’s so untrue. You’re my little sister; I couldn’t hate you if someone fucking paid me. I just give you a hard time because you’re fucking annoying,” He smirked and glanced up at me. The smirk fell when he saw I wasn’t laughing with him. I numbly just sat there listening to him. “And I’m your brother—brothers always give their sisters a hard time. More importantly I’m Chip…I won’t be all cuddly like Louis. I’m not going to hug you when I have nothing else to do with my arms, or tell you about every aspect of my day, and I don’t expect you to do that to me either…because I’m Chip.
“Me and you are different from you and Louis and it’s always been that way and it always will be. But I’m not thecomplete opposite. I still…I still love you as much as Louis does. I still care about you and want to keep you safe and away from assholes like Alec.” He looked up at me I guess trying to see if I understood what he was getting at—which I did—so I nodded, ignoring the stinging in my eyes.
“I’m just saying I’m sorry and that I don’t hate you. I told Louis was going to try and be better to you…stop fucking with you so much…control my temper.” He smirked, “But that doesn’t mean you can come in my room and sleep in my bed. Just because I’ll be nicer to you doesn’t mean I’ll tolerate that sappy shit.” I let out a laugh and my tears finally started escaping. “For Fuck’s sake, Hunter. I said no sappy shit. Stop crying.”
I laughed as I wiped my eyes. “I’ve never heard you say so many words at once.”
“I didn’t say them at once. I said them one after the other.” I rolled my eyes. “So? Am I forgiven?” I almost said yes without even thinking about it. Although his speech was without a doubt on a level of sincerity that I didn’t even know Chip knew existed, I still had one question.
“Chip…why did you tell your coach that Louis was faking?”
He sighed and looked towards the TV. “At first I thought he was…because you’re not out that long for just a pulled muscle. But then he was so mad at me that we never really fixed that after we found out about the skin thing. Then I was talking to Coach after practice once and I jokingly said that he was faking to get out of the running. I was joking—I swear—but it went over Coach’s head and he got pissed. Then shit hit the fan and Louis flipped at me without giving me a chance to explain, so after a while I just gave up. And that’s when I started getting pissed at everyone.” He shook his head. “Last night was just all the built up anger spilling out.”
Finally everything is explained.
Now that I know Chip’s side, I feel like shit for not asking earlier. I’ve always been annoyed with Dad for playing favorites, but it seems like I’m guilty of doing the same thing. All of Chip’s trouble was as much my fault as anyone else’s.
“I’m sorry no one listened to you, Chip.” I mumbled. “We should’ve listened to your side too.”
He snorted, “It’s not like I’m very listen-to-able.”
“Well I’m listening to you now, Chipper,” I laughed. “And I’m gonna do it more often.”
“Don’t fucking call me Chipper, Christ.”
I gave him a big smile, “Now that you said that, I’m going to change your name in my phone from Dickhead to Chipper.”
“I’d rather be dickhead.” He grumbled. “Now go away, I’m watching TV.” I pushed his shoulder before getting off the couch and gathering my dresses. “Wear the white one.” He called as I climbed the stairs.
“It’s cream.” I said back.
“Oh, what the fuck ever!”