I opened my eyes.I could feel the light above me burning my skin.I could hear whispering,and i looked over to see what it was.
"Shes awake!" A firmilur voice said as the figure stood up
"W-who is....there?" I asked moaning a bit
"Are you okay?" The voice asked
"I dont know....who are you?"
"Hallie,your sister,do you remember me?"
"A little bit...."
"I have to talk to you"
My head was racing,and i couldnt breath.I started to cry,i just needed to.I hate the pain im feeling....
"Whats wrong?"
"I dont want to...I dont want to...please dont.." I cryed
"Erikia,what the hell are you talking about?"
"I dont want to live anymore! Shoot me right now please?!"
"No Erikia! I cant lose you! I need you!"
"I hate my life,and i hate myself...please just let me go" I begged.I felt a warm liquid on my arm....It was clear.
"I cant do this!" It yelled running out of the room,i didnt think there was anybody in there,i didnt hear anyone else....I hate this so bad right now!!
"Im sorry daddy! I love you! And i miss you so much! Why cant you just tell god i want to die,and i can see you again! Please!? I cant do this without you...Marshall is trying,but it isnt working......I miss your hugs,your kisses,your love....i miss you! Please just come back one last time,i promise i wont be bad anymore!" I cryed.Just crying rather loudly in the bed hitting the railing.I felt a pair of hands on my arm.
"Daddy?!?!" I asked flipping over.I saw Marshall.....Great.
"Oh...."
"Im so sorry Erikia"
"Dont be...."
"No,i am....im sorry for everything,for kissing you,for making you feel weird,for loving you....Im sorry for stressing you out,and im sorry for not being the one to die that night."
"No marshall dont be sorry!"
"It was my fault he died Erikia!"
"But you didnt mean for it to happen"
"But-"
"Marshall.....stop,look.....Ill get over it..i miss him so fucking bad right now,but it aint your fault.Just let me lay here and die..its whats best"
"No Erikia! It aint wats best!"
I rolled my eyes and turned over.He wouldnt know....he never will...I just want to die and see my dad again....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Come on Erikia we are almost there" hallie said helping me to the couch.
"I want to go to my bed Hai"
"My dad said to put you on the couch so we can watch you"
"Why?"
She didnt answer she just layed me down on the couch.She sat at the end of it and looked at me.
"What?"
"I need to tell you something"
"What? is it?"
"My uhh......my dad...its about him"
"What did he do?"
"Hes.....he says he is in love with you...and please dont freak out about that!!"
"He says hes in love with me?"
"yeah.creepy right?"
"Yeah totally creepy!"
"Well,tomorrow i go to my moms so,you want to stay here with him or come with me?"
"Im going with you...i dont want to stay here with him" I lied.I did,but i couldnt,it would be obvious.He entered the room
"Hey Erikia how are you feeling?"
"Dont answer him!" She said
"Hallie go to your room"
"No,im scared to leave her in here with just you"
"Go to your fucking room"
"Fine,be carful Erikia"
She walked up the stairs and slammed her door.Marshall looked at me with a sorry smile.
"I feel like shit,i want to die,simple as that" I coldly said hiding my face under the covers.He reached over and uncovered my face.
"Please dont do this Erikia,i dont want you to think those things"
"Well i am,so dont try and change my mind"
"Erikia.....You know i love you right?"
"No you dont"
"Yes,i do Erikia! The only reason im trying my hardest not to cry right now is because i know if i cry,you will cry.....and i dont want to see you cry.Whenever i see them tears escaping your eyes,i just break.I need you Erikia,and i dont think i can ever live this life without you.I feel like if i lost you,i couldnt bare this life anymore either.We can walk this road together baby,all you have to do is take my hand."
"Look Marshall,we cant keep doing this,I love you too,but hallie found out! If you havent noticed!! And i am not going to lose my best friend.She means everyhting to me....i dont want to lose her."
"But you mean everything to me,and i dont want to lose you either..."
"Then i dont know,but i have to go with Hallie to her moms tomorrow because she will think i feel the same way."
"So you dont feel the same way?"
"I do marshall,,,and its killing me,but i cant let her know that....."
He Just sat on the end of the couch,at my feet.His face was teary,and he was slowched down,moping.His hair was all messy from his hand repetingly going through it.Dull blue filled his eyes as he looked at me.
"Erikia,i cant just do that.....I cant just pretend anymore...I need you.Litterally."
"Well Marshall i dont know what to tell ya,im not losing her"
"Hallie get down here!!" Marshall yelled standing up
"What? Is Erikia okay?? Did you hurt her!:!?"
"Ughh no! Listen,she cant go with you tomorrow to your moms.I have to keep an eye on her to make sure she wont try and do this agian,doctors orders."
"No,you just want me gone so you can rape her! Well that aint happening!!"
"I would never rape someone! And besides,i have too! Unless you want her to slit her wrist again!"
"Fuck that! Ill watch her!"
"You will not talk to me like that Hallie Jade! Now sit down on the couch and let me explain"
"Fuck-
"Hallie just do it please" I said looking at her serious.She did so,but she sat next to me.
"Okay...look....you dont understand.Me and Erikia well....We Love each other.And you may think thats weird,discusting,and just sick......but i fucking love her like i did your mom.She means everything to me! And i cant live another day in this world without her! And i want you to know that.......even though you probably will never look at me the same again....im in love with her,and i cant change my feelings" He stated,making me and hallie go into shock.He let out the tears that had been growing in his eyes.He just looked at me and cryed more.
"Do you feel the same way Erikia?" She asked me being extremly weirded out and confused.
"Yes....Hallie im so sorry,i would tell you anything,but i couldnt just go "Hey im in love with your dad" It just didnt sound right.Because it isnt right,but I love him Hallie.I dont know what to do,i just dont want to lose you.your the best thing that has ever happend to me! Besides your dad of corse....You and him is all i got....i fucking love you both to much to lose both of you or any of you for that matter.Please understand.!" I cryed hoping to god she would.But she just sat there with a discusted face on her.Looking at me like i just ate a 3 week old peice of gum off of a random desk at school (people do that in my school! Its so gross!!) .She snapped out of her daze......
"Wow.....I cant believe this..." Is all she said and walked up to her room,slamming the door again.I just cryed into my pillow,and suddenly i got up.Marshall watched my every move.I made a run for the bathroom when he caught the door with his foot.I got my blade and tryed to slit my wrist again.Because i new for a fact that if i hit it hard enough that i would die instantly,no more worries! No more drama! No more pain!
"FUCKING STOP ERIKIA! PLEASE!!!" He yelled I ddint.he grabbed my wrist and pulled me,sitting on top of me.taking the blade out of my hand.
"LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE MARSHALL! I WANT TO FUCKING DIE! " I yelled at him,making him lean in and just kiss me.I faght it but couldnt win.I just gave up.His kiss was soothing.I fell under his spell....And we were there in the bathroom making out on the floor.Never thought i would do that...
Okay im sorry,im being lazy xDD If ya hate it,i totally understand lol