Dean didn't know how to react. Cas was missing, so was Metatron. Knowing what the douche bag was capable of, Dean had a right to worry. Cas was reckless at this point.
Dean breathes heavily as he ran up to the thirteenth warehouse they could be in. He busted through the door right as he saw the shiny blade pierce through the Angels heart.
Dean froze for approximately three second before charging towards them. By the time he slid by Cas's side, the scribe was gone. Dean immediately pulled the blade out. "Come on, Cas. Wake up. You gotta wake up." Tears spilled down his cheeks.
"Please. Please wake up. I need you. Goddamnit, wake up!" Dean completely broke down, loud sobs leaving his body trembling. He took the lifeless body's face and held it up.
"Come on, baby." He whispered hoarsely. He connectedly his lips to the growing cold ones quickly. And again. And again. Maybe it was to comfort him. Maybe he hoped it would all be a fairytale and Cas would wake up.
But of course their lives never went like that. Cas remained lifeless. Dean remained crying. He eventually sat up against the concrete wall and pulled Cas into his lap.
"Hey Jude, don't make it bad
Take a sad song and make it better
Remember to let her into your heart
Then you can start to make it better."
He sang softly, voice weak.
"Hey Jude, don't be afraid
You were made to go out and get her
The minute you let her under your skin
Then you begin to make it better
And anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude, refrain."
He pushed the pitch black hair out of Cas's eyes.
"Don't carry the world upon your shoulders
For well you know that it's a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder."
Dean couldn't help the endless broken sobs.
"Hey Jude, don't let me down
You have found her, now go and get her
Remember to let her into your heart
Then you can start to make it better."
"Dean?" A voice called. "He's gone, Sammy." Dean chuckled in spite of himself. "I was too late." A sick smile formed on his face. "I'm always too fucking late!" His breathing became ridged as his jaw clenched.
"Dean.. Come on.." Sam said sympathetically. His brother shook his head and shrugged his shoulder away from Sam's reaching hand.
"I didn't tell him. I was supposed to tell him. I never told him."
"Dean, we have to go."
"Why? Got nowhere to be. Not anymore."
"Staying here isn't going to do anything. We should go back to the bunker." Sam sighed. "Just leave me alone, Sam."
Dean then went on to repeat 'should've told him' repeatedly in a hushed voice. "Just.. Come back soon." Sam patted his brother shoulder twice before turning back and leaving.
Dean ran his fingers through Cas's hair. "Please, if you come back, I'll tell you. I'll tell you everything. We'll have one big chick flick moment. I'll sing for you even, whatever you like. Just please, please come back to me. I'll let you into my personal space, I'll let you sleep in my room even, if you're not having nightmares. Hell, it's not paining me to hold you every night and chase all your problems away for you. I just need one more chance. Give me that. Give me that and I'll give you everything else."
His words vanished into the air. Cas was still dead. He was still alone. After all, isn't that always how his story ends, him being completely alone?
Dean bit his lip in attempt to stop the sobs that rippled through his body. It didn't help much, all his got was a bloody lip and tear stained cheeks.
He sat there for another 20 minutes or so, who was counting? He got up, carrying Cas with him, and heading to the car. He set the limp body in the back seat before setting in the drivers side.
Once he started the car up, Sam sat up, blinking awake. "Dean? Want me to drive?" He asked. Dean only gave a mumble of "I'm fine, Sammy." In response.
His brother shot him a worried glance, but he just gripped the steering wheel and sped down the road. "Dean, slow down!" Sam hissed. Dean's jaw clenched as he accelerated more.
"Slow the fuck down or let me drive, damnit!"
"I'm not going to slow down! The faster I drive the faster we get back tot the bunker and we can get him back."
Sam let out a long sigh. "We can't get him back, Dean."
"You don't know that! You don't, know that."
Sam didn't object further, just looking at his brother sadly. Dean's knuckles turned white and he adjusted his grip on the wheel. Once they reached the bunker Dean slammed on the breaks. He barely had time to turn the car off before he was picking up Cas and bring him inside.
Dean carefully set him in his room. He tried to make him comfortable before exiting and going straight for the books. Sam merely watched from the doorway, not able to bring himself to say something.
Days went by. Dean never moved except to get more book or more alcohol. He never slept. He never ate. Sam was running out of options. He sat on his bed and took a deep breath.
Hey, uh, Gabriel. Cas, he-he's dead. Long story. But Dean, he's not in good shape. I need help. Please.
He waited. And waited. And waited. He eventually gave up hope of him answering. The next day Sam walked into the library. Dean had bags under his eyes, he was on his sixth bottle of whiskey, and there was a giant pile of books on the floor.
"Dean, please eat something." Sam sighed. He didn't get a response. He never did. He walked into the kitchen to see a golden-haired angel on the counter. "He looks like shit."
"I know. Is there anyway to help him?"
"Bringing an angel back. That takes serious mojo." Gabriel answered. "Well, you're an archangel, would you be able to? Please?" Gabe pursed his lips.
"I'll be in touch." And then he was gone. Sam immediately went back to Dean.
"Gabe was here." He announced. Dean didn't even flinch. "He might be able to help." Dean's ears perked in interest. "He said he'll look into it. There's hope, Dean. But if we get him back, I don't think he'll be too happy to see how you've been denying to take care of yourself."
"Then go make me a sandwich, bitch." Dean mumbled. "Whatever, jerk." Sam rolled his eyes but returned to the kitchen to make two of the biggest sandwiches he's ever seen. When he brought them out, his brother practically inhaled them.
"Alright ladies, called in a few favors, but I think we can pull this over."
Dean shot out of his seat. "Then what are we waiting for?" He snapped. "Calm down, hotshot, we need to do it at the exact time of death."
"7:16." Dean answered immediately. "Two hours. We'll set things up and wait it out."
And so they did. There was a lot of animal parts, blood from many species, Gabriel even had to eject some of his grace, which, in his words, "Hurt like a fucking llama". Of corse no one knew what it meant, but they didn't care enough to ask.
Then, one hour and 50 minutes later, Dean had them all circling Cas's body, Gabriel at his feet. Ten minutes later it started. Gabriel took his time, it felt like hours.
Sparks flew every-so-often, words were mumbled, yet Cas still lay there, unmoved. Dean checked his phone.
7:37
He mentally sighed.
What the hell is taking so long?
Then just like that, Cas shot up. No big light, no big gust of wind, or puff of smoke, he just shot up and looked around.
"What happened?" He asked, voice hoarse and deep as always. Dean took a shaky breath. He was alive. He was right there. He could tell him.
"Come on Sam, give em a minute." Gabriel smirked and followed Sam out the door. Dean still hadn't moved, practically shaking. "Dean." He called.
He slowly looked down. "What happened? Why are you crying?"
Dean's hand shot up to his face. He was crying. He would wonder why, but he, and everyone else, knows the reason. "I-I'm not, I mean, just, I'm happy your okay."
"Why wasn't I okay? Why won't anyone tell me? Dean?"
Dean sighed and rubbed his face. "Metatron. He stabbed you. I-I saw it. God Cas, I saw it right in front of me. You-" His voice broke. "You wouldn't come back to me. You fucking left! Don't, please don't leave me again.."
Cas grabbed his hand pulling him down to lay his head on his chest. "I won't leave you, Dean. Never again."
Please, if you come back, I'll tell you. I'll tell you everything. We'll have one big chick flick moment. I'll sing for you even, whatever you like. Just please, please come back to me. I'll let you into my personal space, I'll let you sleep in my room even, if you're not having nightmares. Hell, it's not paining me to hold you every night and chase all your problems away for you. I just need one more chance. Give me that. Give me that and I'll give you everything else.
He promised. He promised he'd tell him. Just. Say. It.
"Cas, I need to talk to you."
"But we are taking, Dean."
"Yeah just," He let a chuckle escape. He had missed how clueless his friend was. "let's get out of here, your mojo good?"
"Yes, my grace is fully intact as far as I can tell." Cas nodded before flashing them to a lightly populated park. "What did you want to talk about?"
Dean looked out at all the kids, running, laughing, so innocent. No idea that those monsters in their closets could come out, right now in the light of day, and slaughter them and their family. Dean can't remember a time that he didn't think about it.
"When you died,"
He still didn't look at him. He couldn't, not if he wanted to go through with this.
"Please. Please wake up. I need you. Goddamnit, wake up!" Dean completely broke down, loud sobs leaving his body trembling. He took the lifeless body's face and held it up.
"I felt my world crumple. You and Sammy are all I have left. I couldn't eat, sleep, nothing. It was hell, being so powerless."
Please, if you come back, I'll tell you. I'll tell you everything.
"I made a promise to you, I promised if you came back to me, I would tell you. I have, I have to honor that. I've tried to back out, but I know I can't. I need to tell you."
"Come on, baby." He whispered hoarsely. He connectedly his lips to the growing cold ones quickly. And again. And again. Maybe it was to comfort him. Maybe he hoped it would all be a fairytale and Cas would wake up.
Tears poured down his cheeks, the image of his love cold, limp, and lifeless flashing through his mind.
Cas placed his hand over Dean's. "I'm not dead, Dean." That merely made Dean cry harder. The hunter pulled him in for a tight hug. "Never leave me. Promise me right now, I know you said you wouldn't, but just fucking promise, please."
"I promise I will never leave you, Dean Winchester."
Dean pulled away and wiped his cheeks fiercely. Cas reached up and forced his hands down, gentle wiping them away himself. "What did you promise to tell me, Dean?"
He didn't answer in words, too many were already spoken. Instead, he leaned forward to hover his lips over the Angels. Cas was shocked, in a sense. He had always felt a deep attraction towards Dean, but he never fully understood it, and certainly never expected it to mean this.
They say there for a while, breathing each other, saying nothing, doing nothing. That was, until Cas pushed forward, finally connecting their lips.
They moved slowly, but in sync , enjoying the feeling of fully being with each other. Dean forced himself away, biting his bottom lip softly. "I promised to tell you that I love you, Cas."
"What does this mean, Dean? We certainly aren't just friends, correct?"
"Correct." Dean chuckled at the formal language. "Are we dating?"
"Not yet. I haven't asked you out yet."
"Will you be my boyfriend?" Cas blurted out, surprising them both. "There goes all my romantic ideas. Yes, I'll be your boyfriend." Dean smiled.
And well, I could tell you how it ended, but that's not the important part, no, the important part is what came next.
Dean Winchester, hunter, and Castiel, Angel of the Lord, we're officially dating, and finally, for the first time in a very long time, they were happy, and they were together.
Sam was beyond overjoyed for his brother, he knew how much they meant to each other, and he would never stand in the way of his brothers happiness.
So, the two hunters and two angels sat around a cheap motel table, with cheap beer, and appreciated all the little things they had, which added up to something they wouldn't trade for anything.
Thank you all for the feedback, I'm trusting you with this. I know I've been inactive, I'm sorry, but hey, here's a long, bittersweet, chapter.