"I know your secret," Harper sings, leaning on my locker door.
"What are you talking about?" I ask, putting my books in my backpack.
"Mon amour," Harper mocks me in a deep voice making me smile.
"No idea."
"No? So you don't care she went home with Theo?"
My head snaps towards her. "What? When?"
"Just now." She grins.
I poke the inside of my cheek with my tongue and go back to putting my books in my bag.
"Elijah, look. I'm your biggest shipper. Is that the word? Shipper?"
"I don't know."
"Get with this century, oh my gosh. Anyways, I want you two together." I look at her as she talks, confused. "You like her and she likes you."
"She does?" I start to smile.
"Well... she hasn't exactly said anything but we'll work on it."
I close my locker and completely face Harper.
"So what should I do about Theo?"
"Nothing! She's not into all that 'I'm so much better' stuff," she explains.
I nod. "Okay. Anything else I should know?"
"Lavender doesn't like being touched but you can tell when she needs a hug. She also likes holding hands, it makes her feel safe," she continues.
"Okay."
"Elijah, don't screw this up. It's not funny. Lavender deserves the world and anything she wants, she will get."
"I understand," I profess.
Harper's expression turns sad as she stares into my eyes. "I'm serious."
"I promise I won't hurt her. I love her."
Oh shit.
Harper's hands go up to cover her open mouth and her eyes light up.
"Wait, don't say anything!"
She jumps up and down excitedly as her smile widens with each leap. "!Dios mío! I knew it!"
I grip her shoulder to make her pay attention to me.
"Don't tell her, Harper. I'm serious. I will tell Lavender when I'm ready." Or at least when I know she's ready.
"Okay. I promise."
"Thank you."
———
I pull back to see his reaction. Theo parts his lips and I gently peck him one more time.
This time he kisses me back as he gently cups the side of my face. I feel him pull my head slightly so I accommodate myself to straddle his lap.
By now the little kisses have turned slower and longer. I take my chance and slip in my tongue.
Theo allows it and I start to feel him under me, making me smile into the kiss. I adjust myself on top of him just to get more comfortable.
"Lavender—," he speaks into the kiss.
"Mhm?"
The front door opens wide making me prop myself up.
"What in the world," the woman at the door says.
Theo looks back and gently pushes me off his lap. Standing, he goes over to grab her bags.
"Lavender, this is my Mom," he speaks with a forced smile.
I get up on my feet and I wipe my mouth. Adjusting my skirt, I go over and shake her hand. "Hello," I sweetly but awkwardly say. "Your sweet tea was really good."
"Thank you." His Mom eyes the two of us before aggressively grabbing the grocery bag out of Theo's hand and heading to the kitchen.
When she's gone I turn to Theo and slap him in the arm. "Why didn't you tell me she was coming home soon!" I whisper yell.
"I didn't know! And I definitely didn't know you were going to kiss me!" he argues.
"You kissed back!"
"I know! I—"
Theo cuts himself off and stares at me, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.
That feels different when Elijah does it, not that I'm thinking about Elijah. Of course not. Definitely not.
"You should probably go or else she's gonna ask you to stay for dinner," he mumbles.
My expression turns embarrassed.
"Oh! Unless you want to stay, that's fine."
"No, I don't want to impose. It's just that my backpack is in the kitchen."
He nods and gives into the kitchen. About three minutes later, he comes out with my backpack.
"Oh, shit. You don't have a car."
"It's fine. I'm fine, I'll walk." I wrap my hand around the door knob.
"I can't let you do that."
"I'm good. I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?"
He reluctantly nods and I shut the door behind me.
I can't believe I just kissed him! Why would I do that?
"Can I try something?" I'm so stupid!
I kick a rock as I walk. I feel a sprinkle so I look up and see it's cloudy.
Just my luck.
My house is at least an hour away but it's okay, this is my punishment. I can't just go around impulsively kissing everyone.
My computers going to get soaked. And my hair, I hate wet hair.
I feel like I want to cry. Why did I do that? I'm so disappointed in myself.
It starts continuously sprinkling when I see a white car pull up next to me. I let out a huge relieved sigh when I realize it's my best friend ever.
"Hey, Lovey. Get in," she speaks through the window.
I get in and my eyes immediately start watering up.
Harper's expression turns sad and she brushes my damp hair behind my ear. "What's wrong, mama?"
"I kissed him," I explain trying my hardest to not cry.
I know I'm being dramatic but I feel so guilty for some reason. I'm in no state to get into a serious relationship right now.
Harper nods gesturing for me to continue. I like talking to her because she never interrupts me and just listens.
"I feel so embarrassed. And just so upset at myself." I put my head in my hands and Harper takes that as a sign to speak.
"What about it made you feel embarrassed? Did he not kiss you back?"
"He did, that's what made it worse," I hear my voice crack. "I feel so guilty and I don't know why."
"It's okay, Lovey." Harper reaches over and rubs my back. "I'll drop you off at home, okay?"
I nod and sniffle, looking out the window as my silent tears fall with the raindrops.
Harper drives me to my house and gets out to open the car door for me. As soon as I stand, she tackles me into a hug.
"It'll be okay," she whispers, pampering light kisses in my hair.
I sadly smile and walk into my house, watching her drive away.
I immediately go up and take a shower.
I sit in the shower for about an hour. My tears mixing with the water.
I don't know why I feel like this. He kissed back, he said he liked it. So why do I feel upset? Is he not the person I wanted to kiss? Theo's a sweet boy, he's done nothing to hurt me so why can't I bring myself to like him?
I wrap the towel around my body and sit in the corner of the room. Wiping my silent tears for the hundredth time, I lean back and rest my head against the wall.
Maybe I should go back on my meds. But I mean fuck, I'm trying so hard.
Maybe I just need to be alone for a while until I feel better.
Starting Saturday because Friday I can drink all the alcohol I want and then heal my hangover by myself the next day.
I bring my knees up to my chest and bury my head in between them.
I'm just so tired it's exhausting.
***
A/N:
Hell, my loves! A couple of things:
1. All my pre-written chapters have been posted so updates are going to start coming slower and I apologize in advance. I hope that's okay.
2. I think it's time to start a posting schedule. Right now I'm thinking every other day or maybe every Wednesday and Friday? I'll keep you updated 💗💗
If you have any questions, concerns, or additions about/to this story, please let me know!
Enjoy reading <33
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