Nicks perspective
We decided to walk down to the peer where the new coffee shop is, our apartment was in such a beautiful location, it had a view of the ocean and the nice city walk that was paved with beautiful stone. This all was a short walk from our place, it looked like a cottage down there with all the small shops and markets embellished with flowers and greenery of all sorts, it made a beautiful view from our deck. Of course Charlie picked out the apartment Charlie was good at everything even house hunting. We were walking down the street and I realized that his hand wasn't in mine, I interlocked our pinky's because that's how we prefer to hold hands, it was special it ment something more to us than meets the normal person's eye it was how we told one another at school we loved each other before I was out and when we kept us a secret. It was easy to hide underneath a table our quickly in the hall, it's always been our silent way of telling each other how much we cared and loved them. he turned his head to glance at me and his smile was unbelievable it was a full teeth smile and a true one he looked so happy with the sun rays hitting his body lighting him up, the little breeze blowing his bouncy curls around a hardly noticeable amount but if you took the time to take everything in you would notice how gently he looked with the light breeze hitting him. He was wearing green converse black jeans and a green sweater to match, he looked so attractive in his well matched autumn style outfit, we we're in between seasons here it wasn't cold but wasn't too hot, today was perfect you could wear a sweater and be comfortable or wear a t shirt and still be comfortable, this was my favourite time of year. "Stop starring at me" Charlie said pulling his free hand over his face to hide his cheesy smile and flushed cheeks. "Are you embarrassed by my undeniable love for you " I said as I elbowed him in the side gently. "Who's the nerd now" he said followed by the most soft chuckle. "I'm going to be married to the biggest one ever so he might have turned me into one do you know him? his names Charlie Spring soon to be Charlie Nelson" Charlie pulled my hand up and kissed it "I like the sound of that" "Me too" I said before I hooked him around the waist and pulled him in towards me our body's were touching and our faces were close I leaned down to Charlie's level and kissed him nothing serious just a nice gently kiss the type you see your parents give each other maybe a bit more passion than that but still we were in a public area I didn't want to make anyone uncomfortable, nobody should be doing a full on session in a public area. I spotted Elle and Tao waving at the door of the café, I felt so emotional seeing them, last time I saw them which was only a few days ago, was when I was crying my heart out onto Elles shoulder asking her over and over if Charlie was going to be ok and back to his usual bubbly easygoing loveable nerd personality. I just have so much gratitude towards Elle as I see her I can't wait to give her a big hug and thank her for everything. She really calmed me down which is exactly what I needed.
I didn't care! When we were only a few feet away I ran up to elle and wrapped her up in a huge hug which almost knocked her off her feet. As I hugged her Charlie says "Awwww" and Tao goes "Get a room you too" I laugh a little before saying to Elle "Thank you for everything me and Charlie both really appreciate it" She pulls away from the hug and holds my shoulders "Nick I'll always be there for you and Charlie no need to thank me" I smile and we all walk in together. Charlie bends down to me who's sitting "Nick I need to talk to Elle quickly can you lot stay here" I nodded me head and patted his thigh as he left to talk with Elle, which I'm pretty sure is about my panic attack he's been a bit worried about it, i'm not that worried anymore like I was. Charlie is doing good he's trying so hard and is doing much better. Tao was across from me and started a conversation "So mate are you doing any rugby anymore" I nodded my head no and said "No life's a bit too crazy for rugby but I would like to maybe join a team in the future" "I've been doing a whole lot of no exercise lately I know we're not that old but it's hard to maintain the body we had when we were younger" Tao words hit like tone of bricks, My body when I look in the mirror screened in my head, he was right I didn't have the body I used to in high school, I never thought of that, how different I must look in Charlie's eyes does he think I'm fat too. I don't look like the guy he fell in love with. I snapped out of my thoughts when Tao said "Like I have definitely been eating too much! your not doing too bad your self, well might as well eat good well we still can right" he laughed after, lightening the spirt of the harsh comments he was making towards my body, he said it in a nice way but it was still the same meaning weather someone tells you your fat or You've been eating good its the same meaning. I couldn't be mad at Tao he was just telling the truth something he does best. "I wouldn't be surprised if Elle and Charlie left us there just like they were years ago, it's funny what time can do" I just agreed and nodded my head to everything he was saying throwing in a laugh or two to seem like I was there in the present moment when instead I was drowning in my own self doubt, he was right though Charlie probably thought I was disgusting...
Authors Note
Guys Nick is perfect the way he is just like you all body sizes are beautiful and deserve love Nick is feeling self conscious and down about himself which I think almost everyone goes through at some point that doesn't mean what he's thinking is true he's beautiful and perfect in every way and so are you. ❤️❤️❤️ I love you all ... voting and commenting supports this book tons and if you like the authors it helps her a lot too THANK YOU ILY AND HAVE THE BEST DAY TOMORROW IF ITS THE EVENING WHEN YOUR READING THIS OR THE BEST DAY IF YOUR READING THIS ANY POINT IN YOUR DAY 😘😘😘