Marriage, a Heartstopper Fan-fiction

Chapter Sixty One Talk to Me

Charlie's perspective
I had been waiting all afternoon for Nick to come home from counselling, I thought it would be nice if we went out for ice cream when he came home, we haven't walked to the park and got ice cream in forever it seems. I heard the door slowly creek open and then Nick walks inside from the kitchen I say "How was it want to get ice cream" he shouted back "it was SHIT" My heart sank hearing that. I know he doesn't love counselling and now its obvious that his councillor said something that upset him. Counselling has really helped him manage his thoughts and I don't want him to lose this outlet. Hopefully he will just talk to me about and not repress his emotions. I go to the bathroom door which he's locked himself in and knock, No answer so I say "Babe please, what's wrong" he doesn't answer me which scares me a little "Come on your scaring me open the door I want to talk to you" He faintly replies "I don't want to talk i'm done with talking today" "I know, I understand i've been doing counselling for a long time now and sometimes you don't want to hear the truth" There's a long pause before he says "I don't want to hear anything! I just need to sit here in silence" Your brain can sometimes play weird cruel tricks on you making you feel or act a certain way, and when this happens all you want is for the noise inside to shut the fuck up. I sat with my knees to my chest against the bathroom door the whispered "I'm right here and I love you no matter what" he softly replies " I love you too" Even if we're upset or angry at each other we always say I love you back no matter what.

Nicks perspective
I wanted more than anything to let Charlie in but I felt too much so much that I couldn't process it all. I was starting to believe what he said was the truth and I did need help but then the angry and the denial would change my mind, I didn't know what I was going to tell Charlie, but along the way I thought about how helpless I would feel if Charlie didn't tell me what was going on, especially if it had something to do with his mental health. "Charlie" I said waiting for his response before telling him the truth.

Charlie perspective
I heard Nick ask my name and I immediately responded "Yes love I'm right here" I tapped my finger against the door showing him I was still sitting against the door. He hesitantly said "Can we talk" I happily said "Yes of course" and after I said that, he opened the door and hugged me tight, we hugged for a while until I pulled him over to the couch so we could talk about what ever was going on. he sat on the couch turned side ways so he was facing me I did the same. Before he even said anything I noticed his hands were tightly squeezed together, I knew this ment he was stressed. "Your hands" I say as I quickly interlock mine with his so he can relax a bit. He tightens his grip and says "Charlie i've been feeling kinda bad lately" I sort of tilt my head telling him as if I need a little bit more information than that. "I feel gross and scared when your not around and my counsellor thinks I might have separation anxiety" My heart increases in speed and my palms start sweating what did this mean? I don't know anything about separating anxiety and how it could be affecting Nick. "What can I do to help" I say guiltily "Ummm Char I don't know my counsellor said he could make an appointment with a real doctor to help me but I don't know about that" I knew what he was going through it's hard realizing that you need help but trust me it's better to get help than not. "I think you should go see a doctor if your councillor thinks it's the right thing" His face looked fearful and pale I rubbed his back and he said "Maybe, but i'm scared I don't want things between us to change" In a reassuring tone I replied "nothing will change between us I promise, the only that might change is when we're not together for what ever reason you will be ok and won't worry so much" he nods and lays his head on my chest with his arms wrapped around my torso.

A few days later

Nick has been doing much better he's been happy and seems to be not in this slump he was in before, he hasn't seen the doctor yet or talked to his councillor about it. I'm trying not to pry but I still have to remind him every day because maybe one day his mind will change and he will make the appointment. I've done some research and you can get rid of Separation anxiety over time with care and patience. "Awe thanks love" I say as he hands me a cup of tea "Do you think your ready to make the appointment yet I really think it will help, i've been reading about it and it can go away you just need the right strategies, I only want you to feel better and less stressed" He looks like he's interested in what Im saying but doesn't replie. After he finishes his tea he says "Ok i'll talk to a doctor" My face burned with excitement and rushed over to him to give him a kiss "Awe babe i'm proud of you"

Authors Note
Hope everyone is enjoying there summer if it is summer where you live!!! Love you all 💗 and if you've read all the chapters from the beginning I appreciate you and for my OG's thanks for sticking with me this far and I hope you continue to enjoy it!!! ❤️