Previously on An Eventful Internship:
Peter got shot.
***
"What's up ma peeps" I say as I walk into the living room of the tower with a grin on my face.
Bucky, Clint and Scott are there playing Mario Kart, I dunno where the rest of the team are thought I'm secretly thankful mom isn't there.
"Sup Pete- WHAT THE FUCK?!" Bucky says, freaking out when he sees me.
"PPPS HELP! ASSISTANCE NEEDED! PETER IS HURT I REPEAT PETER IS HURT!" He yells into a walkie-talkie, what the fuck?
"WHERE THE FUCK IS MY CHILD!?" Nat says as she walks into the room from the kitchen, Oh no.
Her gaze finds me and I internally groan, welp guys this is it, I'm about to die, see y'all in hell, I'll send a post card.
"WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED WHY ARE YOU BLEEDING?!" She exclaims and she rushes over to me faster than Pietro runs to pizza.
"I'm on my period" I say, don't judge me, I panicked.
Bucky let's out a snort at my response as Ma glares at me.
"Okay... I may or may not have been shot by a bank robber and-" I'm saying when I'm cut off by my wonderful mother.
"YOU WHAT?!" She exclaims in horror.
"Maaaa I wasn't finished, and then again by a cop 'cause he thought I was the robber" I say and she looks livid.
"I need the robbers name and the cops. Now" she says, bro how the fuck am I supposed to just know their names.
"How do you expect me to know that...?" I question timidly.
"I'll just hack into the surveillance footage, what bank was it?" She asks, do I tell her or not? Ehhh she'll probably kill me if I don't but if I do she'll kill my new besties, those robbers were so nice.
"Mom calm down, it was all a misunderstanding, I mean the dude apologised, he was really nice, as for the cop he's not racist" I say and she just looks hella confused as well as Bucky, Clint and Scotty.
"I- please don't tell me you made friends with the robber, and what the heck does racism have to do with this?" She asks and I just shrug.
"I HEARD PETER WAS HURT WHERE IS HE?!" Steve exclaims with wide eyes as he rushes out of the stairwell out of breath. I- what was he doing? Usually this dude can run a marathon and not be out of breath.
"Dude did the serum where off? It literally sounds like you got that asthma back" Bucky says in amusement.
"I- just- sprinted- from Brooklyn- and ran- up 100- floors " he says through his breaths.
"Dude... why?" I ask him, what a dumbass bros am I right?
"Oh thank god you're alive" he says and comes over and hugs me.
"Dude... I kinda need to breathe" I say and he lets go looking at me apologetically.
"I came as soon as I heard! Peter are you okay!?" Wanda yells in worry as she comes out of the elevator.
"Jeez why is everyone asking me that?" I say, like honestly, how many times do I have to say I'm fine.
"What the fuck... Peter you're fucking bleeding!" She says with wide eyes and I shrug.
"I'm fine" I say nonchalantly.
"You're not fine! You were shot! Twice!" Clint exclaims, Jesus fucking Christ, sorry for my language grandma, may you rest in peace by the way.
"YOU WERE SHOT?! PETER GO TO A HOSPITAL!" Steve yells, my god, these people need to calm down.
"Hey it's my gunshot wound, I can do what I want with it!" I say, crossing my arms.
"You're a fucking dumbass, I'm calling Bruce" Ma says, whipping out her phone.
"Well I'm gonna go sit on the white couch and tell Tony you had your period and bled on it" I say, fighting the urge to stick my tongue out at her.
I then go and sit down while she calls Bruce while Steeb fusses over me and Bucky pokes me making me glare at him every time. What an asshole.
"Buck stop it!" Steve scolds him, swatting his hand away as he goes to poke me again.
"Whaaaat? I'm bored" Bucky whines.
"Well be bored somewhere else" Steve says.
"Alright come on, we're meeting Bruce at the Med Bay" Ma says as she gets off the phone then continues to basically drag me into the elevator. How rude, am I right?
We get to the med bay and she just points at the bed... table? I dunno what it's called but I go and sit on it, not wanting to argue with her because she's scary.
Suddenly the elevator doors open with a ding and Bruce scrambled out looking suuuuper worried.
"Where is he?!" He exclaims and Nat points at me and he races over like I'm about to die or some shit.
"We're have to get these stitched. Right now." He says and I throw my head back with a groan earning a glare from Ma.
"Okay okay, I won't complain" I say, putting my hands up in defence with yet another groan, except this one of pain rather than annoyance because of the shoulder movement I guess.
I let him stitch me up and whatnot, ha apparently I had a bullet fragment still stuck in me so that was fun having him dig around in my shoulder to get it out.
"My money don't jiggle jiggle, it folds, I like to see you wiggle wiggle for sure, makes me wanna dribble dribble, you know, riding in my fiat, you'd really have to see it" I start to sing as Brucie bandages me up.
"Peter... what are you doing?" Ma asked in an exasperated tone.
"6 feet 2 in a compact, no slack, but luckily the seats go back I got a knack to relax in my mind, sippin some red red wine" I continue, ignoring her judgemental statement.
"Why are you British? I'm so confused" she says.
"Hush mother, it's called vibing" I say and she can't help but laugh and shake her head slightly in amusement.
I'm just that funny folks. It's undeniable.
"Peter shut up" Wanda says having read my mind, when the fuck did she get here?
"Rudd" he huff and cross my arms earning a glare from Bruce because I disturbed his process of mummifying me.
Honestly these people are so annoying.
I would also die for ever single one of them. No cap.
I don't say that meaning not Cap, as much as I find him annoying I would still take a bullet for the dumb hunk of shit.
It's a weird feeling.
———
Y'all have jonahkin to thank for his constant nagging for me to update
I have no idea what the fuck this is but it's a continuation of the last chapter.
Sorry for not updating I've just been on A03 recently.
ITS ALSO MY BIRTHDAY IN 5 DAYS AND IM GETTING A MOONY INSPIRED CAKE, SOME NEW RECORDS AND MY BROTHER SAID HE ORDERED ME A SENSORY SOCK ITS GONNA BE SO FUN!!!!!
Anygays here's a funny mean as a way of asking for forgiveness for not updating in like a month:
Peter's Shrug Count: ya know what I will count it this time, ONLY ONE WTH?!
Word Count: 1100
- mayaaa ✌🏼