It All Started By One Single Tear (Rantaro x reader x YandereMastermind Kokichi)

Chapter 4 Part 8: Rantaro Amami's Fourth Freetime Event

Your POV:

Multiple thoughts were going through my head as I sat in my dorm with a tired looking expression on my face. My mind was spinning. A panic attack in the dining hall in front of everyone... the way Kokichi was acting. All of these things going through my head were more than enough to leave me brain dead.
Thoughts on who the mastermind could be were also going through my mind. The person to me that seemed the most suspicious was Kokichi. The way he was talking in the dining hall... it was enough to give anyone shivers down their spine.
My mind was wondering what was going on... why was I the one being blamed. It seemed like everything that was in my resolve diminished to nothing. I balled my hands into fists as I slammed them into my bed as a bead of sweat rolled down my face.
"I don't understand...!" I exclaimed, "I don't understand what's going on anymore!"
I was trembling slightly as I was hunched over my bed, my hands still balled into fists. I had no idea what to do... I had no idea what was going on. I was blamed by the people who hated me... I was blamed by them that the world was ending... all I could do was stand there and take what was coming. It was all I could ever do...
Despite these thoughts, I knew I couldn't give up. I couldn't give up on how far I've come. I had to stay strong for him... I had to keep trying to better myself. For Rantaro... for everyone here. I was saving people, trying to keep the mastermind from finding out. Everyone here was counting on me... I had to keep myself up, even though it was ripping me apart from the inside. I knew I had to find the truth...
One thing didn't change ever since we all arrived here. The fact that we all didn't know why we were here. I had no idea why we were forced into this killing game. I didn't know anything, and it seemed like no matter how close we got, something would drag us away from the truth.
One of the things that I knew now was that I had some extra time on my hands. It was something that always happened after a Flashback Light was discovered. We would unlock some sort of memory, and then after that, we would have free time. This was a continuous pattern that didn't go unnoticed by me. I didn't like how we all got used to this, but what more could we do...?
I was taken out of my thoughts when I heard the doorbell chime. I was used to the sound, and it always told me the same thing as always. There was someone at the door.
With a nervous look on my face, I walked over to the door. I was pretty sure I knew who it was going to be. It was most likely the one that I loved, Rantaro. He saw the state I was in during the meeting in the dining hall, and he told me that he wanted to speak with me after the meeting. I obviously knew I couldn't get out of this.
When I opened the door, my suspicions were right. Rantaro was there, with a stern, yet concerned look on his face. I knew he wasn't going to let me get out of this. He made that fact pretty clear in the dining hall.
"Come on, (y/n), let's go," Rantaro told me, "you do recall what I said in the dining hall, correct?"
I nodded nervously in response to that. Beads of sweat were forming on my face in response to that. I had a feeling that Rantaro was going to talk to me about my panic attack, and then he was probably going to tease me afterwards. I remembered that promise that I made him.
"I-I do remember..." I replied nervously.
"Then you must know that you aren't getting out of this, right?" Rantaro asked me in response.
"Yeah... I know I can't get out of this..." I muttered in response to that.
I looked to the side nervously. I was obviously still very unsettled about what happened. Rantaro had to be unsettled about those memories too, but he did a pretty good job at hiding it. He was always good at hiding his emotions. That's what made him more of an enigma.
"W-Where do you want to talk...?" I asked nervously.
"I was actually thinking about going to your lab," Rantaro replied, "I know you're upset, so why don't we try cheering you up by watching some anime? Then when you feel up to it, you can tell me everything."
I could feel myself starting to smile in response to that. It seemed like Rantaro knew just what to do to cheer me up. I honestly didn't know what I did do deserve someone as amazing as him by my side. I really didn't know what I did to deserve him, but he seemed to think that I deserved him.
"Alright," I told him with a smile.
Rantaro seemed to laugh lightly in response to that, a smile forming on his face. I felt his arms hook underneath mine, before he effortlessly lifted me up and spun me around. I was shocked by this, but I started laughing nonetheless.
"There's that cute smile," Rantaro told me, "you made me think I wasn't going to see it again."
Rantaro wrapped his arms around me, and I was pulled closer to him, my hands resting on his chest. A deep scarlet formed on my face, enough to put Kurapika's eyes to shame.
(Bungee Gum, it has the properties of both rubber and gum)
((Take that back Leorio! I said take it back! It's Mr. Leorio.... (okay I'm done))
"I was so worried about you..." Rantaro spoke, "it seemed like you forgot that I will always be there to support you... so we are going to spend lots of time together today, and today is going to be focused on making you feel better."
I blushed even harder in response to that. It was then that I realized how much Rantaro must've been concerned over me during that period of time. He wanted to be sure that I would be okay... I knew I had to stay strong for him.
With that, Rantaro and I decided to spend some time in my Ultimate Lab. We were dating at that point, but even so... I felt like I was getting closer to him. It was nice, being able to get closer to the one you love.
I decided to go through my Monopad to see if I had anything nice to give him. I had options to go to the gift shop that was in the school, but I've been there multiple times. I decided to look around at all of the items I had. I thought for a moment before selecting the Beret I had in my items. I thought that Rantaro would like it, and I honestly wanted to see what he looked like in it.
I blushed lightly as I decided to give the Beret to Rantaro. He seemed to be into trendy accessories, considering his look. And also the colors red and green were across each other on the color wheel. It would add a bit of contrast to his outfit, and it was fascinating to me.
"Here," I laughed nervously as I handed him the Beret, "you know very well I love giving gifts... it's a way that I say thank you to those who sacrifice their time for me."
Rantaro's eyes seemed to widen when I presented the Beret. He took it without hesitation which shocked me slightly. He seemed to just look down at the Beret.
"You don't have to give me gifts for spending time with you," Rantaro told me, "I enjoy spending time with you no matter what... and the Beret is wonderful, I love it..."
I smiled lightly in response to that. I knew I didn't have to give someone a gift for hanging out with me. It was something I wanted to do just to be nice. It was the type of person I was... a people pleaser. I always made an effort to make sure that I made the others around me happy.
"I know I don't have to do it," I told Rantaro, "it's just something I do to make people happy..."
Rantaro seemed to laugh lightly in response to that. He took the Beret I gave him, and he placed it on his head. I was right about what I imagined for it. The contrast complimented him very well. I felt a blush form on my face.
"It looks amazing on you," I told him, "it really pops!"
"Thank you, my princess," Rantaro replied with a charming smile, "you didn't forget your promise did you?"
"No, I did not," I laughed nervously in response.
"Good," Rantaro laughed in response, "so what anime is on the watch list today?"
"I was actually thinking, Hunter x Hunter," I laughed, "it's an anime I've watched recently, and it's amazing!"
"Don't tell me the plot this time," Rantaro laughed, "just put it in and let me be shocked."
    All I did was laugh in response. Rantaro was requesting me not to tell him the plot, and I could see why. Every time we went to watch an anime together, I would always go overboard with telling Rantaro the plot. It was enough to make me laugh slightly. My love for anime was what made me so happy, so it was always obvious that I would always explain the plot in a way that gave spoilers. It happened when I told him about Akame Ga Kill, telling him to read the manga instead. In my defense it was good advice. I cried in episode six when a character that I loved died. It was always sad to me that an anime could be very sad like that.
    "Alright, I'll agree with that," I laughed nervously, "I always go overboard while explaining the plots, so I'll let you decide what the plot is for this one."
    "Alright," Rantaro laughed, "while we watched the anime I believe was Akame Ga Kill, you were hellbent on telling me to read the manga."
    "Hey!" I exclaimed, "that was some top of the hand advice! I cried a lot while watching that anime, and the manga has a completely different fate for some of the characters!"
    I pouted slightly after saying that. I really did think the advice I gave was worth giving. If the anime didn't follow the story of the manga author, then it's obvious that the manga should be read. It was that simple.
    "Don't start pouting now, (y/n)," Rantaro told me, "it's going to make me die from your cuteness."
     I seemed to blush harder in response to that. I decided to walk over to my anime shelf and go to the H section where Hunter x Hunter would be. I spent a moment trying to calm myself down from being flustered as I found the anime. As soon as I found the anime, I took the first disk from the DvD case, and I put it into the player before turning on the TV.
    As soon as I put the disk in and turned on the TV, I walked over to the couch where Rantaro was sitting, and I joined him. Rantaro knew how to make me flustered, and it always made a fun reaction for him, while I was embarrassed. I decided that I would at least explain how long the series is.
    "There's an adaptation for 1999 and 2011," I explained, "the 2011 anime is the one we are watching, and it has around one hundred and forty-eight episodes, so it's long, but the anime is good."
    While watching this certain anime, there was a certain arc that killed my very soul. It was the Chimera Ant Arc. That one was truly painful to watch, and anyone who has seen it could see why. Rantaro was sure in for a ride at this point.
Soon enough, the first episode started playing, revealing the character Gon Freecss, a twelve year old boy who came from Whale Island. His goal seemed to be simple in the anime. He wanted to become a hunter to find his father who wasn't in his life. In a way, this boy reminded me of Edward and Alphonse Elric from Fullmetal Alchemist in accordance to the fact that their father wasn't in their lives either.
These characters did have a difference though. While Edward hated his father, and Alphonse didn't, Gon didn't hate his father either. He wanted to find him and be with him. Gon had to catch the creature of the swamp to be able to take the hunter exam, which he did by his skills with his fishing rod.
Rantaro seemed to let out a small laugh as he watched the screen, Gon catching the gigantic fish monster. It made me laugh slightly too. It was always nice showing someone something you enjoy.
"That kid is rather energetic," Rantaro laughed.
"Yeah," I laughed in response, "Gon is pretty strong too. Probably even stronger than us..."
"That's kinda obvious," Rantaro laughed, "that kid is sure a strong one if he can catch something that big."
I nodded lightly in response to that. As the episode continued, I found myself snuggling up to Rantaro with a light blush on my face. Rantaro seemed to smile lightly as I felt his arm wrap around me. I was comfortable, being with him. It always made me feel safe to be with him. Rantaro seemed to never judge me no matter what happened. He was like that rare ray of sunshine in my life...
At this moment, now we were at the portion of the episode where Gon met Kurapika and Leorio. Kurapika was personally my favorite out of the bunch, considering it felt so weird to be older than Gon or Killua. Kurapika was the only survivor after his clan was brutally murdered by the band of thieves known as the Phantom Troupe. Kurapika had eyes that would turn scarlet when he felt certain emotions such as rage, but he was a very mature character.
I could feel myself starting to laugh as the iconic scene played.
Take that back Leorio! I said take it back!
It's Mr. Leorio...
The way the two argued put a smile on my face considering that Leorio was as dense as they came. It seemed that the old looking teenager didn't think about what he said, and obviously he didn't care.
We continued watching the anime for around a couple of hours. I was feeling calmer than I was feeling when I was in the dining hall, discovering the new memories we had received from the Flashback Light. I knew that I had to speak up to Rantaro about this, so we could discuss it.
I had a small frown on my face as I paused the anime. Sometimes I had to just lay back on getting sucked in, so I could focus on the more important issues at hand. As an Otaku, that was hard for me, considering that my life was filled with anime and manga, but I knew that I had to keep focused on what the situation was.
"Rantaro, I'm ready to talk about what happened now..." I muttered with a nervous look on my face.
Honestly, I was used to having Rantaro coax me into talking about what had happened in my past. He was always there to comfort me when I needed it most, but I still needed to meet him halfway on these issues. We were dating, and I knew I had to meet him half way.
Rantaro had his gaze focused on the TV screen when I paused the anime. After I said what he did, he instantly looked towards me with a serious expression on my face. I knew that Rantaro was normally someone who was very laid back, but he got serious when he needed to be, and all of that was showcased in this moment.
"Alright then," Rantaro told me, "I want you to explain everything you saw in that memory. Don't leave anything out..."
In response to this, I let out a sigh. I could do this. I always vented to him before. Rantaro was always someone I could talk to if anything went wrong. This was a time that I needed to vent. Sure I was getting more confident, but that didn't excuse the fact that I was still depressed. I still thought bad thing about myself even though I was seem by a hero to a lot of people her... the people I saved. Depression anxiety were still in my heart even at this moment.
    It was getting better, but only slightly. The only thing that had changed about me was the confidence in myself, however there was a lot more for me to work on. I had to work on being less self conscious of myself. I always thought I looked awful when looking into the mirror... it was body dysmorphia. That's what it was called. I had to learn that the way I saw myself was not how other people saw me... it was something that I had to improve, or else I would keep slumping back to the same point.
    "It seemed that when I saw the memories, a couple of images popped in my head... the image of a news report, and the image of the riot groups, saying that all humans deserve damnation..." I explained, "but as soon as the conversation everyone had transpired, everything became more clear to me..."
    It seemed as soon as I started talking, the words in my head were coming off of my tongue like a water fall. These emotions that were frustrating me were all bottled up, waiting to be released when I was alone, but Rantaro knew that would happen, and he wouldn't let it happen. I recalled multiple times where I tried to let out emotions when I was alone, but each and every time that happened... he was there to pick me back up. When Kaede and I were blamed for trying that tunnel of despair... after the first said trial after he came back. The only time he wasn't there was when I thought I had lost him near the beginning of this whole mess. That was the only time that he wasn't able to pick me back up when I needed it, but I couldn't blame him for that.
    "When Himiko and Tenko brought up the mention of those groups handing flyers to me.... and when it was brought up that those groups wanted humanity to die.... everything became clear... more memories rushed into my head at that point..." I explained, "it was the fact that everyone who hated me... everyone who blamed me for what happened to my former friend... they pressed me to take those flyers, saying that I was the cause of everything..."
I clenched the clothing on my knees as I said that. It hurt to think about again. It was like a knife was being plunged into my back... it felt like no matter what I did in the past... what I did to avoid being talked to... it didn't matter to them. No matter how much I tried to appease the people who never liked me, they always continued to try and torment me, making my mental health deteriorate at an alarming rate. When people say bad things about someone, eventually they will start to believe it, and that's what happened with me... the constant insults made me believe I was what they said I was... a monster... a curse... it was all everyone really thought of me as...
Despite having a few people to call my friends, the whole world was pitted against me, even now. It was constantly as if the world hated me, trying to get me to get off of it... despite this terrible situation, the happiest moment in my life was when I met Rantaro... when I met every one of these amazing people. I had no idea if they would've liked me if we weren't in this situation however. That was the sad part to me...
"They told me I was a plague to this world... that I should be taking a flyer because according to them, it was my fault..." I muttered, "they told me that I was the reason that humanity would end... they pitted it all on me, and honestly... at that time... I believed it..."
    Rantaro seemed to gasp in response to that. Almost instantly I felt his arms wrap around me. I could feel the soft fabric of his shirt touching my face. I felt tears form in my eyes again. Rantaro seemed to know when I was about to break down, and he never got it wrong.
    "(y/n), the people tormenting you are terrible people," Rantaro muttered as he traced his hands across my back in a soothing manner, "they have no idea what you've been through, and to be honest, they are probably jealous of you..."
    Rantaro continued to rub my back as I silently cried in his arms. He was the one who always made me feel better, no matter what I faced. He always gave me the strength to move forward, but despite that.... I had to find a way to be strong on my own too.
    "You are a gorgeous girl, (y/n)," Rantaro told me, "you always care about everyone, even if they don't deserve it. If something bad happens, you are always quick to give them a second chance, even if I don't agree... those people don't deserve your kindness... that's my opinion anyway."
    I closed my eyes as Rantaro continued to hold me... I did get closer to Rantaro today. Every time I was around him, we seemed to get closer and closer together. It was nice. Rantaro was always mysterious, but the more I spent time with him, the more I seemed to know his personality better.
"I really appreciate you..." I muttered, "you are always there for me, even when I don't feel like I deserve it. I know I say that a lot but it is the truth..."
"Why wouldn't I be there for you?" Rantaro asked me as he held me, "I love you, and even before we started dating, I cared about you... don't ever forget that I will be there when you fall... I will catch you each and every time... that's a promise."
We seemed to stay there for awhile. I let my emotions out with Rantaro holding me in his arms. I knew that he was my ray of sunshine. No matter how much a storm would cloud my vision, Rantaro would be there to clear it... like a breath of fresh air.
It seemed that after a little while, someone seemed to burst into the door of my lab. All I heard was a laugh which made me instantly know who it is.
"Nee-hee-hee, I thought I would find you here, my beloved!" Kokichi exclaimed, "and it looks like Rantaro is with you..."
It seemed that when Kokichi mentioned that Rantaro was with me, he seemed to sound very forced which was odd to me. I was confused on why Kokichi was in here. Perhaps he needed something from me.
"Kokichi is there something you need...?" I asked nervously.
"I actually do!" Kokichi exclaimed, "you are right as always! I do need something from you, my beloved."
I was nervous on what Kokichi needed from me. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest because of the anticipation. It was making me very anxious, thinking of all of the possibilities on what Kokichi could've wanted from me at this point.
   "I want you to bring some food to Kiyo," Kokichi told me with a surprisingly straight face, "and while doing so, I want you to interrogate him. I think everyone wants to know why he tried to kill Angie, and with you almost being a victim, I think he would be more than happy telling you his reasoning behind it."
    The way Kokichi was talking. It was enough to send shivers down my spine. Kokichi was normally someone who joked around with other people a lot, constantly getting on their nerves, but this... it was different... Kokichi had a completely straight face as he told me what he wanted me to do. His tone of voice also seemed to hold no emotion as he was talking either. This was terrifying to me. It was like he was in another class trial, having moments where he was straight faced as well.
    Despite his tone of voice, his request made me anxious too. The fact that Kokichi wanted me to give food to Kiyo and interrogate him. I had no idea why he chose me to do it... but the thought of having to see him right now sent shivers down my spine.
    I hadn't forgotten what happened that day. Where it happened... yesterday was the day that it happened. I could still feel the hint of the could metal that was touching my neck when I confronted him. Kokichi knew damn well I was almost killed by him, but despite that he was still asking me to do this.
    "Why do you want me to do this...?" I asked, "I'm still shaken up over what happened. I can remember how it felt to be in that situation clearly, and you still want me to do that..."
    "But you care about everyone here, right?" Kokichi asked with a smile, "I know that even if someone tried to kill you, you would still be there for them. I mean look at Angie!"
    Kokichi was right about that fact. Angie did try to kill me, and I did give her a second chance. Kiyo was different though. Somehow when his true intentions showed for killing, the expertise of his plan even without the flaws were proof enough that he probably killed more than one person. Despite that, I needed to do this. It was like it was my responsibility, but in truth... I didn't want to go alone...
    "(y/n), you don't have to agree to do this," Rantaro told me, "but if you do, I will come with you, and I'll make sure nothing happens to you while you give him his food."
    "If you're with me, I should be okay," I told Rantaro with a smile, "alright, Kokichi... I will do it, but Rantaro has to come with me... I don't want to do this alone."
I looked over at Rantaro with a small smile. I knew I could have the strength to do this with him here with me. I was still trying to get past what happened, the fear I felt from what happened. I was still trying to process what happened.
I nervously touched the bandages on my neck with a sigh. I already agreed, so there was no going back now. Chances are, Rantaro and I would have to stop by the kitchen to pick up a meal for Kiyo. Then we would have to go up to the third floor of the school to go to Ryoma's lab where Kiyo was being held.
"Can I come with you guys too?" Kokichi asked, "I don't want my beloved to have another panic attack."
"Alright, Kokichi," I muttered, "I know you will keep asking until I say yes, so I'm just going to say yes."
"My beloved knows me so well," Kokichi replied, "I just want to make sure Kiyo can't do anything to hurt you."