"Your audition is next week, but I know it's already yours. They just want to see what they're working with." Stella said to me over the phone. I've been wanting to get into acting ever since my fans brought it up two months ago.
The movie I was going for was about a group of high school students that decide to drop out and become sugar babies and live their fantasy lives but it comes with consequences in the end.
These last few months were different without Mattia. Like it was different while on tour because I was busy and working. But now that it's over I've just been staying home relaxing and writing a couple songs but it's more lonely. Taylor and Vic have gone off modeling again.
Since I had nothing else to do, and it was seven in the morning, I was cleaning around the house. Today was Mattias last day in Spain and I've been counting down the hours since I woke up.
message from mattia:
last practice photo 😔
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we using the handcuffs when i get there 🥳
i bought a special outfit too 🤫
show me a sneak peak 👀
i'd rather keep it a surprise ..
damn babe 😩😩 i'm getting on the plane in twenty minutes btw :( ima miss it but i'm glad i chose to stay and i have some news i think you would like
All the rooms downstairs were clean and all that was left was my room. I connected my phone to the speakers in my walls and shuffled Mattias playlist.
Seven months ago Mattia was really going through the worst depression I had ever seen. I traveled back and forth for three months but had to stop when the movies came up.
I've had to talk him out of suicide once and it really broke me. I couldn't show it though, I had to be strong for the both of us. My third time going, I walked into his hotel room and found his roommate crying hysterically speaking to Mattia and he was sitting on his bed with a gun laid in front of him, both of them were drunk. So drunk they couldn't even see or walk straight.
It was something I never thought I'd see especially from him because he's one of the happiest people I know. There was something inside me making me feel like it was a bit my fault and that I should've been there more for him.
He spent his 19th birthday doing nothing but laying in bed while I rubbed his head.
His parents came with me every time I went to Spain. Sometimes his mom couldn't come as much so it was mostly me and his dad.
