Our Baby

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I looked forward to this weekend. I'm excited to know the gender of my baby. I am feeling depressed but at least, there still something to look forward to.

I cried to my appa as soon as I reached home after trying to talk to Jungkook two days ago. It's painful to know that Jungkook hates me. To be honest, I cannot blame him. Leaving him clueless was not a good decision. I guess it angered him a lot. Maybe he waited for me. Maybe he tried to look for me. But I left nothing for him to find me. Not even my real name. Perhaps, just the good memories we shared. Now, I doubt if he still considers them good memories.

I'm now trying to be strong for my baby. He's all I have right now. My child and my appa. Yes, mine alone. My baby's father is now out of the picture and though it hurts, I need to accept the truth and move on. That's the best thing to do.

Taehyung arrived earlier than expected. I learned that he checked in in a hotel near our home. He drove me to the clinic as my appa chose to work today. He said four months to my due date will just come in a blink of an eye. He wanted to work hard for me and my baby.

One more thing, he is so fond of Taehyung that he allowed me to come with him alone.

I am now sitting down on the clinic bed and waiting for the doctor while the nurse is preparing the equipments.

Taehyung holds my hand while we wait. A smile cannot be wiped out of his face. He is as excited as me. I stared at his precious face. His innocent demeanor is so endearing. He is aware that this is not his child but he is treating my pregnancy as if he's the real father. I am happy about it but I felt sad for him too.

At last, the doctor came and greeted us with a happy face.

"Good morning Jinnie!" Dr. Kang looks at Taehyung. It's her first time seeing him. But she chose not to ask about my relationship with him. I am scared that she will ask him if he's the father of my child. Or possibly, my boyfriend.

"Are you excited?" She smiles at me as she puts some gel on my tummy.

I nod. "Yes. I am so eager to know the gender of my baby."

"What do you prefer sir?" Dr. Kang asked Taehyung while looking at the monitor and the machine gliding on my stomach.

"Girl or boy as long as the baby is healthy, I have no problem with the gender," Taehyung answered enthusiastically as he watched through the monitor.

Dr. Kang laughs of Taehyung's excitement. His boxy smile flashing the whole time and he keeps on squeezing my hand as we wait for the announcement.

"Congratulations Jinnie." Dr. Kang handed me a print out of the ultrasound. "It's a boy!"

My heart races in glee and a tear fell from my eye as I stared on the black and white print out of my baby. He is so little inside me. I wiped my tears as I place the paper against my chest. I just can't wait to meet him. I can't wait to hold him in my arms and hug him.

My baby boy. My firstborn will be a boy.

"Do you have a name in mind?" Taehyung asked as we arrived home. Appa is still out, probably still at the boat, fishing.

I nod my head as I slowly sit with Taehyung helping me. "I want the name to be Soobin if a boy or Hyejin if a girl. But since it's a boy, I will settle with Soobin."

"That's a cute name! I know it fits him well." Taehyung kneels in front of me and rubs my belly.

Taehyung looks at me with worry in his eyes. "Did you call his father?"

I looked down, trying to stop my tears from falling. I don't want to talk about it after I release all my anger and frustrations to my father. But it's inevitable that he will not ask about it as he's the one who suggested that I should inform the father.

I wiped my tears. I wasn't able to talk as I gather my strength to talk about again. Taehyung sat beside me and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. I leaned on his chest and started to cry. Perhaps, he understood my cries as I felt him hugging me now. I hugged him on his waist. Just like before, Taehyung can give me the comfort and calmness I am craving for. His arms can give me the peace that I wanted to have. Is he the right man for me?

"Don't worry too much, Jin. I'm here for you. I will never leave you. I will stay here beside you and our baby." He kissed my forehead and rubbed my arm. "If he doesn't want you and the child, it's his loss."

It took me a while before I stopped crying. Taehyung keeps on reminding me that my baby can feel my emotions. It's better to try to be happy for my baby so he will be happy too inside me.

"Let's go back to Seoul, Jin." The question made my eyes widen. He knew how I ended up in Busan. He knew why I ended up hiding like a mouse. Why is he asking me now to go back to that place where I am being hunted.

"I can't. You know that I am not allowed to go back to Seoul."

Taehyung holds my hand and looks at me in the eye. "Can you please stop worrying for a while and trust me? My mom will take care of you while you wait for your due date. We will protect you there. I want to keep an eye on you until it's time for you to give birth. I want you near me."

My mouth fell open by his offer. It's just too good to be true. "Taehyung I don't know how to believe you. I'm really sorry if I have doubts. But how can I face your parents knowing that this child isn't yours? How can they accept me? Maybe they accepted me as a whore but accepting me with a baggage is just too much."

Taehyung let out a sigh and bites on his lips. Am I being hard-headed again? Is he starting to get annoyed at me? "Jin, I can't blame you if you're doubting my intentions. But I already made it clear long ago that I like you. I want you. I love you. I know you have fears in your heart. Your experiences may not be a pleasant one but I hope you will consider me as a different person. I'm not like him. My parents are not like them. I hope you can open your heart for me. For my family. For my love."

"My father helped me locate you. If he doesn't like you for me, why would he even help me find you? You know my mom. If there's someone who can understand you better, that would be her. And if there's someone who can understand us better, that would be my parents. So please Jin, consider my offer. You don't have to decide now but I hope you will give me your answer before you give birth."

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