I shyly tug a strand of hair behind my ear as I watch Carol. We were sitting on the couch watching a movie. We weren’t very affectionate with each other, mainly because we just started dating and mainly because I’m shy too.
I see Carol reaching out to hold my hand and she’s quick to see the hesitation on my face, “It’s okay Y/n, we don’t need to hold hands.” She mumbles and I reach out to take her hand in mine, running my thumb over the veins popping out. Her hands felt so soft and warm in my own and I cuddle up to her, placing a kiss on her cheek.
“Mmm you’re really soft.” I mumble, resting my head on her shoulder and she kisses my forehead. I bite my lip nervously, looking at my girlfriend. I really wanted to kiss her but I was a bit scared. I guess I am just scared of losing her.
“Carol, you know I like you right?” I say facing her
“Are you breaking up with me?”
“No! No, I promise. I just have to tell you something and I don’t know how you’ll react.”
“Okay, go ahead.” She encourages me and I clear my throat
“I’m asexual. It just means I prefer to have romance and not like sex. I would understand if you want to end things.” I mumble and she turns to face me completely, holding my hand in hers.
“That’s okay! I mean it doesn’t change how I feel about you and there are other methods I can get pleasure.” She mumbles and I smile at her. “We’ll still make out and cuddle though, right?” she asks and I chuckle softly.
“Of course. And hold hands. I literally love your hands so much they’re so soft.” I say, giving her hand a squeeze and she looks at me with curiosity. “Do you have questions?” She nods and I motion for her to continue.
“When did you realize it?”
“Well, I was in this relationship with a girl named Zendaya and we had sex twice and I just felt like I wanted to not do it again, you know? She was amazing but sex just isn’t for me. She obviously understood and supported me and she got a big break in Broadway and moved to New York. She was the only girlfriend I had, besides you, who understood my sexuality and still supported me. I guess I just feel like feelings are more important than just a good time, you know?” Carol is silent for a moment and I play with her fingers, waiting for her to breakup with me or just say something.
“Well, I fully support you Y/n. I might not fully understand your reasons, but I like you a lot and that’s not going to change.” I smile at her and bring her hand to my lips, kissing the knuckles.
“That means so much to me, Carol.” She smiles at me, happiness written all over her face.
“Can we make out now?” she asks curiously and I giggle, shaking my head.
“Yeah.” I say with a hum as she connects her lips with mine.
