The Unoticed Truth (Edited)

Chapter twenty-two

Hoseok's pov:
I woke up with a pounding headache, I groaned and tried to sit up, but was held down. I glanced down, seeing strong arms around my waist and then the familiar pine scent hit my senses. My eyes shot open in shock, now very much awake, slowly and carefully untangling myself away from the alphas arms.
Sitting up in the bed and glancing down at my body, seeing that I was completely bare. I sniffed the air, scrunching from when the scent of sex hit my nose, which, for some reason, made me feel off. My gaze then broke down to the alpha, who was fast asleep on his side, I brushed his messy bangs away, getting a betting look at his calm, sleeping face. I held my breath when he shifted and turned onto his back. Gasping, my hand clamping my mouth shut to quiet my quick breathing. Taking in several panicked breaths, pulling my hand away from my mouth, to trace the tattoo mark on the alphas chest with the tips of my fingers. What happened last night? I have no memory of anything that happened. I remember, picking up Taehyung from the New Years Party, taking him home and then everything went black after that. My eyes traced to something glowing on his nightstand, seeing it was only the ring I got him for his birthday. Something then clicked, I jerked my hand away from his chest, tears began to blur my vision and dampen my cheeks. Bitting my bottom lip to keep myself from crying to loudly, not wanting to wake up the alpha.
The blue moon, I remember seeing the blue moons glow, when I was about to leave his room. I saw it in the corner of my eye, shining from coming out from behind the clouds. But his rut scent made me feel fuzzy, the kiss, I can still feel his hands on me, and the pain of loosing my innocence, and the fact I enjoyed it. But I know I didn't want this, not yet, I didn't even give him my consent to do it with me. Did he knot me? I don't remember if he did or not. How am I even able to remember most this? I'm not supposed to, maybe it was a blue moon.
I felt my world start to tumble, my body began to tremble, feeling so used from an alpha that I had feelings for. 'I need to get out of here!' I mentally screamed to myself, quietly crawling of the bed with shaky legs, catching myself on the nightstand. Bitting my bottom lip from the pain shoot up from my lower back, tasting my own blood from the habit. Taking slow breaths and taking one step at a time, picking up my clothes and sliding them on. I take one last glance at the alpha and left.

I went home, slamming the door, running to the bathroom to take a hot shower.
Looking at myself in the mirror, seeing the hickies painted on my skin, he didn't mark me, but he did abuse my scent gland, it's a deep shade of black and blue. I put some medicine on them, to help the bruising color a bit. Fighting tears, trying not to let my wall break again. But the memories are haunting me, I should have known better, he was drunk and on his yearly rut. I feel so disgusted in myself, I did try to stop him, but he's so much stronger than me, and his rut scent was intoxicating. Plus, I was in pre-heat, I felt it coming, but I suppressed it down with suppressants. My last heat got delayed after the hospital incident, this is probably going to mess it up big time. I can't believe that it was all lust though, only lust, not a single bit of love, I let an alphas rut take my virginity through lust and rape.
I let out shaky breath, sitting down on my bathroom floor. Feeling my back hit wall, pulling my knees to my chest. The marks he left behind will heal on my body, but not mentally and I will never mention this to Taehyung, I can't, not yet at least.
I jumped from my alarm going off, echoing throughout my apartment.
I haft to get ready for work now, letting out a sigh and mentally counting to three, hissing when standing up. Good thing I don't have dance lessons today, I take out the ibuprofen from a little cabinet above the sink. Swallowing down four gel tablets, sipping up water from the faucet. I washed my face, applying some makeup to cover the bags under my eyes. Brushing my teeth before heading into my room to change. Slowly sliding on a black turtleneck dress, adding a loose gray poncho like sweater on top and sliding on black leggings underneath. I slip on my favorite black ballet flats, taking a look at myself in the full body mirror, making sure the marks are hidden. Styling my hair, to make it look less messy and like I just crawled out of bed.
'This is going to be hard to hide at work for a while,' I thought to myself.