The Three of Us

75. September

As the days went on, Walter began to lose that "newly-born" look that Anne did not like- the wrinkly, funny purply-red look. But this did not improve her mood, because once he started to look like a regular infant, it was easier to see his features. She still would not look at his face much, fearful of what she might find there.

Rachel and Marilla were doing nearly everything for the baby, including bathing him and changing his diapers. They were also in the boarding house kitchen often to prepare bottles; but this Anne could not do, as she was not supposed to be out of bed yet. Anne fed the baby, giving him the bottles that Rachel or Marilla brought to her, and she burped him when he was finished, but that was all she did for him.

Rachel still lectured Marilla often about how she ought to make Anne do more for the baby, but Marilla would not listen to her. Marilla thought Anne was simply exhausted, and in her exhaustion she could not cope with the needs of the baby. She felt sure that over time as Anne healed she would begin to do more.

But one day when Marilla had gone to the pharmacy, Rachel decided enough was enough and Anne must do something. She was positive that if someone just pushed Anne to take over, she would, and she would see that she could take care of him for herself. So when Walter needed his diaper changed, Rachel brought him to Anne. She put a towel down and set the baby on it with a wet washcloth and a clean diaper and told Anne she needed to change him.

Then she went into the parlor and sat down. She thought that if Anne realized no one else was going to pick up after her, she'd do it.

And Rachel thought Marilla would be pleased to discover when she returned that Anne was going to start taking care of her baby after all.

But Rachel sat waiting, and Walter kept crying.

Finally Rachel went back into the bedroom. Anne had not taken his diaper off. Strangely, though, she was holding him to her as if she was trying to comfort him.

Rachel came over and took the baby from Anne's arms. "What are you doing?"

"I'm holding him," Anne said, as if it were obvious.

"Yes, but why?" Rachel asked, feeling frustrated because she could not understand her.

Anne explained, "I'm trying to make him stop crying."

"Getting a hug is not going to fix a wet diaper."

Anne put the baby back down, almost dropping him like a hot potato, and turned around in bed, facing away from Rachel. "I don't want to change him," she said.

When Marilla returned, she wondered why Rachel and Anne seemed put out with each other.

--

Diana and Jane soaked up every bit of news Gilbert could give them. Diana received letters from Anne, but due to her mother's reluctant acceptance of the situation, Anne could not mention anything about the baby, and Jane could not receive letters at all.

Gilbert told them what the baby was like- though Anne's description of him was not at all flattering- and they both felt sad to know that Anne didn't seem to want her baby.

Jane could not stop thinking about him, and how Anne didn't like him, and one evening as her family sat in the parlor, it built up inside her until she couldn't help saying something.

"Well, I think it's just terrible," Jane announced, to the room-to everyone and to no one in particular. "Poor Anne. Stuck with that baby and being so miserable!"

Her mother was sitting bent over her sewing, shutting Jane out.

Her father was reading, and Jane could tell he was not even reading but was simply focused on the page in order to tune her out.

Prissy and Billy had a checkerboard between them, playing. Once Jane mentioned the baby, Prissy, blushing, would not look up from the game. Billy's expression especially angered Jane, he simply looked bored with the whole subject.

"I think it's just terrible," Jane said loudly, again, getting no reaction. "Nobody wanting that poor baby."

Mrs. Andrews finally looked up. "Must you go on about that...unpleasant subject?"

Jane deflated. "Mother..."

"What?" Billy snapped, finally looking up. "It's all you talk about, Jane! Headline: No one cares."

"That's just the problem!" Jane said angrily. "No one cares! And we should! We should all care. It has to do with us, too, you know!"

She took a breath. "I was thinking, we ought to tell Anne that we'll take it sometimes. Maybe we can work out sort of a schedule. So she doesn't have to take care of it all by herself."

Billy rolled his eyes. "Why would we keep it here?" he asked. "What good'll that do? Nobody wants it."

"Well, guess what?" Jane asked, upset. "Anne doesn't want it, either! But unlike you, she can't pretend it isn't here!"

"Well I don't want anything to do with it," Billy muttered, going back to his game. "And I don't have to."

Jane was getting upset. She stood up and tossed her needlepoint onto the sofa in a way that wasn't like her at all.

She looked at Billy. "You can't bring...bring something to life...and then say you don't want anything to do with it! ...It's alive because you made it come to life! And then you think you can just walk away!"

"When can I go back to Nova Scotia?" Billy asked his parents.

--

Once September began, and the baby was a month old, Dr. Wescott said it wouldn't be much longer before he felt it was safe for Anne to travel.

"Oh, it'll be so nice to be home," Marilla said. "Though I admit I've been spoiled here. It'll be hard to give up the conveniences we've gotten used to!"

Anne did not say one word to her in response.  Marilla worried; it seemed the longer they had the baby with them, the less and less Anne ever spoke. She missed her dear girl and wondered if she would ever get her back again.

--

Gilbert, who had still been staying with Matthew, decided he needed to go back to his own house. But even though he wasn't sleeping at Green Gables anymore, he was there every day. His own house was too quiet, too empty. Though Matthew was so quiet he almost wasn't there, Gilbert found his very presence comforting.

Though Matthew did not say it, the feeling was mutual.

--

It was September, and school was soon to begin. All of the children wondered what their new teacher would be like. They'd never had a lady teacher before.

Gilbert found he could not look forward to school, because all it did was remind him of how much Anne had had taken from her.