Aubrey's Playground

:7:

"Trust me! Lebron is in LA for the weather. That man didn't promise a damn thing!" Aubrey argued back. "In Cleveland, he promised a championship! And he brought it. I don't remember him saying he was bringing a damn thing to LA, man is there to ride the wave and enjoy the weather."

Oliver shook his head and laughed as he wiped his face with his napkin, he dropped it on his empty plate and pushed himself from under the table.

"Iigh, though I would love to argue about whether or not Lebron gives a fuck about LA..."

"Here we go!" Nessel cut him off mid-sentence. "The I gotta go home because I have a wife speech!" He purposely changed the tone of his voice as he teased Oliver. Aubrey leaned forward in arms laughing out loud.

"Really? I have to go through this every time!?" Oliver argued back stretching his arms to either side of his body. "You two need to be finding a wife!"

"Oh!? Did you hear that Aubrey!? We need to be finding a wife instead of dealing with the surplus of vagina" Nessel said sarcastically as he turned to Aubrey.

"This is why my wife doesn't like you two, you're bad influences!"

"I'm a bad influence!?" Aubrey said in shock pressing his fingers into his chest. "Him, yeah! Me, no!" He pointed his thumb in Nessel's direction.

"You know what!? I'm going to indulge you two tonight..."

"Oh, did you hear that Nessel!? He's going to indulge us! How lucky are we to have his presence!" Aubrey teased. Oliver took his seat back at the table, he laughed as his childhood friends as they continued to mock him. "Please tell me why marriage is better than what I'm doing right now!" Aubrey asked leaning back in his chair and getting comfortable. "Marriage is the greatest thing that has fallen in your lap!? And I've been around to see the amazing things that have fallen in your lap! But you're telling me Marriage is the best one!?"

"Yes!"

"And when you divorce!? She now gets half of what she didn't work for!"

"We have a prenup! See that's the thing! You're thinking about the divorce before the marriage!"

Nessel frowned shaking his head. "Please! Prenups mean nothing!"

"You ask a woman to sign a prenup that's like spitting in her face and calling her a bitch! The first thing she says is... oh, you don't trust me!? You think I'm some kind of gold digger!!" Aubrey argued back.

"That's because it's the wrong woman! If she's in this shit for you! She'll sign that shit!" Oliver said back. Nessel and Aubrey shook their heads laughing.

Nessel leaned forward directing his attention straight at Oliver. "Men are supposed to spread and conquer. That is what I do as a man! It is in our DNA! We are not meant to be monogamous! It's been proven by science! Scientists, Oliver! Scientific research has told my black ass to spread and conquer! I mark my territory! I can't spread and conquer if I'm married!"

"Well, you have a son so you definitely handled the spreading part!" Aubrey said in agreement. "You got that part down."

"See! Spread your seed, conquer your women, and mark your territory!" Nessel explained further in a drunken slur as he laughed.

Aubrey joined. "I don't know about the spreading the seed thing, but I definitely do the conquering women and marking territory part!"

"Oh, yeah! I forgot Mr. Vasectomy over here! Not wanting that responsibility!" Nessel teased Aubrey rolling his eyes. "Got his nuts clipped cuz he's scared of a mini him!"