👾Why?🙈

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*Brooklyn's POV*
It's been so hard. I couldn't get over him and I couldn't get over the fact that he just left me. He left without a second thought and it was killing me. I couldn't be happy. Not when I knew that he was gone.

He was my happiness. He was my everything and now he's gone. I knew all the boys could see how much I was hurting but no one knew how to help. It was making me lock myself away from everyone. I had stopped going live, I had stopped posting, I had stayed away from the vlogs as much as I could. I didn't want the fans seeing me like this. I didn't want them worrying about me.

My nights were restless. Sleeping would just bring memories of him. Memories of him leaving after all the happy memories we had. It'd bring memories of all our small and petty fights and twisting them into ones that were so much worse. Anytime my eyes closed, they'd be there waiting for me, waking me up to just sit there and cry.

I wanted to stop feeling this. I wanted my emotions to just disappear. I honestly just wanted to feel numb.

Here I was again, laying in bed reading through all our text messages. I could feel the tears slip down my face and for the first time since he left I texted him.

I miss you so much it hurts. I can't be without you. I can't do this. I can't be happy. I can't be me without you. There is no me without you. I love you and without you I all there is is pain.

I sent it, instantly regretting it. He won't care. If he did he wouldn't have left. Then my phone started ringing. I looked down at it and his name popped up. I instantly answered the call.

"M-mikey," I stuttered. "Brooklyn," he said quietly. I felt my body shaking more and I felt more tears fall down my face. "P-please stop," Mikey said, "I don't want you to cry."

"W-why?" I asked him, "Why did you leave me?" I heard him sigh, "You are better off without me. Our dreams changed and we both need to go our separate ways. I can't keep you happy if I can't keep myself happy by being there. If I wasn't there, I couldn't be there for you Brooklyn. So had to let it go. All of it and that meant you too," he said and I felt like I couldn't breathe now.

"Shh, shh. It's okay. It's better this way. You will find someone better. Someone who will love you and treat you so much better than I ever did. Everything will be alright Brooklyn. Maybe not right away but in the end it will and I promise you that. But you have to try," he said.

"I love you," I said. "I-I, Brooklyn you know I can't say that. You know what will happen and I can't let it. You have to move on," he said and with that he hung up. I couldn't help it. Instead of sadness coursing through me it was only anger. I took my phone, chucking it as hard as I could at the wall before collapsing on the bed, crying into it till I fell asleep.

At least now, I know why.

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