Spencer's POV
This was going to difficult... Coming clean and telling her how I truly felt...
"What is it? Is the baby Ok?"
A knock sounds on the door breaking us from the bomb I was about to drop. A doctor comes in with a nurse and they begin to go over everything with Grace, they inform her that they will be sending someone in shortly to do an ultrasound and that she is dehydrated as well as lacking nutrients. They are setting her up with some vitamins as well as keeping her overnight for monitoring. Once they finish Grace turns to me expectantly.
"What were you saying Spencer?"
"I want you to listen carefully... Nothing was planned, I didn't know until after I left you that night." Fear ignites in her eyes as she remembers what I told her before she ran off. I'm going to now try and explain myself and hopefully I'll be able to tell her how I really feel.
"Were you involved?"
"What!?" I shout unexpectedly.
"Did you have anything to do with what they did to me?" She questions harshly.
"No Grace! Calm down and just listen, let me get this all out before I answer any questions."
"Relax Grace, he's not going to hurt you and he most defiantly was not involved with those monsters." Nodding her head to Logan I breath deeply and once again try to explain myself.
"I never meant to be gone for so long. I wanted to come to you but things happened and I wasn't able to contact anyone. I looked for you the moment I came back home. I had my Captain and the teams keep and eye on your profiles. I was hoping to find you.... I was too late. The night after we met at the hospital was the night my Captain informed me that you were the girl I had been looking for since I returned."
"You've said that already. Why though? Why did you wait? What happened that kept you away?" The fear and worry in her eyes makes my head spin with all sorts of negative thoughts.
"You know how I mentioned Logan's accident?" I whisper She looks at me with confusion.
"Yes? What does his accident have to do with you? And you still have yet to explain why you waited to tell me. Did you decide I wasn't good enough? That after being RAPED I was ruined?" From the corner of my eyes I see Logan stand and exit the room leaving us alone to discuss this.
My anger spikes at her words. How dare she think those horrible things.
"How could you think such terrible things? Of course that isn't what I thought. I saw the mess you were in and my focus was not on pushing myself on you in your time of need and struggle. I wanted to be there for you as a friend first. I was hoping that once things settled down I would be able to tell you that I was happy to have found you, that I was disappointed." As soon as the word leaves my lips she glares and scoffs at me.
"Let me finish! I was disappointed in myself for not finding you sooner and not keeping you safe. I find you to be the most beautiful, strongest and most amazing woman that I know. I am grateful that I have been able to get to know you both online as well as in person. I'm not excited about the circumstances in which I found you, I wanted to murder those men... I would never be ashamed of you or see you as spoiled or ruined over anything that you've gone through."
Sobs break out of her as she looks away. It hurts... Seeing her in pain because of me makes me feel like the dirt on the bottom of her shoe.
"Please leave." I hear her whisper. I feel myself break at those words. I feel empty and dead inside at those words. She is the only one who could destroy me as much as she has.
"I will leave only on one condition." I sigh out as my heart constricts at the thought of not being here to keep her safe myself. I will make sure someone is though.
"What?"
"Logan stays with you at all times as well as a guard being stationed in the room and outside. I won't compromise your safety anymore. Even if you hate me I will keep you safe no matter what this time."
Watching her nod her head I stand up from the bed and walk over to her. Watching her back stiffen really brings it home for me. She didn't let me finish explaining myself... I lean down and grab her by her waist and place her at the top of the bed under the covers. Never once does she relax or look at me. I sigh once more and lean down placing a kiss on top of her head and exit the room. Once outside the door I look to Logan leaning against the wall.
"Do I have to ask or were you listening?"
"What do you think?"
"Please don't say anything. Just let her rest, I will leave her alone unless she wants to talk or if she wants to see me. Please don't interfere. I want her to trust you without worry that you're advocating for me."
"I understand Spencer. Just go calm down and deal with the mess back at the station after you get some rest yourself though."
"I'm actually going to head there now and send a few guys over here and figure out what's going on with Shane as well as let Cap know the low down on the Mel situation."
Nodding to me he heads to the door and before he enters he turns back looking at me.
"Listen... She is hurting right now, don't let this break you... I know you are freaking out inside and are trying to be Mr. Macho Man with no emotions. You were trying to keep her safe, she will see that in due time."
"I can't expect her to accept or forgive me. I should have told her, I should have protected her. I am no better than those monsters that hurt her. Instead of the physical hurt I hurt something far worse just like Mel. I destroyed her trust in me... There may not be a way for me to come back from that. I will keep her safe though even from a distance. I will ensure her and that baby are happy from here on out even if it means it might be with someone else."
With that I turn and leave the hospital looking to get things taken care of down at the station with Mel and find out what is going on with Shane.
So I've decided I plan on making a sequel after I finish the 30th chapter! :) I already have an idea of how I want the 2nd book to be. Be prepared :)
4 chapters to go before the end. :)
What do you think of Spencer's confession?
Do you think Grace will forgive him?
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CZYTASZ
Desert Rose
Romans"She passed out, she needs to rest more I can come back to talk with her when she feels better, I can't rush her." "I'll take you to her room." Following Mel I enter Grace's room to find it completely spotless as well as organized. "She really is O...
