Beautifully Damaged: Ibrahim (Emotional Deprivation Disorder)

His Nanny

Chapter 4:

Jasmine's POV:

Naguguluhan siyang tumingin dito.

"Become human again? But he's already human" Nalilito siya, mukha mang Greek God na ubod ng gwapo ang anak nito, sigurado siyang tao ito.

"Yes, physically.. but emotionally, he's not and it's my fault" sabi nito at sumeryoso ng husto ang mukha ni Kazim.

Natahimik naman siya.

Ayaw niyang makialam sa issue ng mag ama.

"He is incapable of loving and trusting someone, hence he became a stone.. the unfeeling child of mine" sabi nito sa kanya at tinignan siya.

"Are you not going to judge me?" Biglang tanong nito.

"I don't have any rights to do so" mabilis niyang dagdag.

"Right because I'm your owner--"

"No, because I don't know the real reason and the real story" mabilis niyang sansala, nakita niyang natigilan ito.

Tapos ay bumuntong hininga ito.

"I wasn't wrong then" sabi nito at ngumiti pero hindi umabot iyon sa mata nito.

Mukha itong malungkot.

Naisip niyang kahit pala mayaman, malungkot pa rin, kasi siya lahat ng problema niya nagsimula sa pera.

"I neglected him and verbally abused him because he killed my only love..my dearest wife" sabi nito at napasinghap siya.

Napasinghap siya.

"It wasn't his fault I know, because my wife died due to labor, but I can't help it, every time I see him, I see my wife..on the child who killed her" patuloy nito.

"Y-you blamed him?" mahinang tanong niya.

"Yes, that's why I put him to the care of a caregivers and Butlers, I told them to take care of him, but strictly not to love him because he took the only woman that I love" sabi nito.

Nangilid ang luha niya.

Alam niyang kakakilala pa lang niya sa dalawang mag ama, at kay Ibrahim pero hindi niya maiwasang hindi isipin ang batang si Ibrahim na walang nagmamahal dito.

Wala itong nakagisnang Ina, tapos buhay nga ang tatay nito pero pinapahirapan naman siya.

"I trained him yet still abused him verbally, until one night, when he was twenty one, my wife visited my dream, and she hates me..that's when I thought, I should correct what I did to my only son...but it's too late" malungkot na sabi nito.

"I tried to reach out for him, to love him finally, I apologized, I told him that I'm regretting everything that I did...and--" huminga muna ito ng malalim.

.."and he said the most painful thing that I ever heard "

Mabilis niyang inihanda ang sarili.

"He said blankly with no expression or anything.. ' I don't care about you, just mind your own and continue what you've been doing to me', and that made my heart breaks the second time around" sabi nito at parang nawawalan ito ng enerhiya na napasandal sa upuan.

"And I said to myself... what I have done? I thought he's just avoiding me or any people who's around him, until one day, I brought him to a psychiatrist and I found out..he had an emotional deprivation disorder"

Tinignan niya ito sa nagtatanong na mata.

"He was incapable of loving someone because he never experienced that, that he may be not show it but he's afraid of rejections" kwento nito.